A Message From ~Caldwell~ — Page 2

Caldwell has been making snotty remarks about my tuchas and boobies. I think he likes me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!~~~~~ Madeleine~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Shaquannah.you ignorant slut! Caldwell likes me, not you! I heard that Fruma Sarah Titzlinger likes you and that you are both Lebanese! ~~~~~~~~ Madeleine~~~~~~~~~~

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Updated On: 9/10/04 at 11:05 PM

You are a tramp Shaquannah!! And I hope you get cramps so bad that they have to take you to the hopsital in an amblance. I have a good reputation. And if you dont believe me, ask Reb L. Withoutacause at school.~~~~~~~~`Madeleine~~~~~~~

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Updated On: 9/19/04 at 02:08 PM

I herd that if you poke Madeleine's too-kas with a pin, schmaltz comes out

Jack, you know that Brother Purity says its a sin to play with yourself, so stop doing it. Its very important to lead a virtuous life.

Yesterday was an un-LOL day. Thinking about what happened on NYC three years ago depressed me. When I was going to Our Lady of Food, it was really near the Financial Districk in Manhattan and we saw all the garbage that was taking place that day. It was really horrable and rembering it all yesterday made me feel very sad. Uncle Dollypop took me out to this big holy shrine we have on Long Island and we sayed a few prayers and I felt a little better but not much. But when we got home he made this stuff Madeleine was talking about called beef brisket and it was really good. I mean REALLY good! He took the receipt out of a Jewish cookbook and all I can say is those Jewish mamas really know what to do in the kitchen! There were no leftovers at all!

Now I have to do a report on what life is like on the Island of Lesbos. All I can think of is that's where the lesbians come from.

TTYL.

~Caldwell~

PS--Do you like the new avatar? It's the pitcher my uncle had took when he was in Scotland. It's a real pitcher, but it was taken in front of a fake backdrop at the Edinburgh Woolen Mills. I think he;'s wearing the tartan of Clan McCormack, or somethin like that. He'll kill me when he finds out I posted it here!

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Pipsi, I rember you! We had a very intellchual discushion on Ditmars Avenue. Rember? It was about weather Coke was better then Pepsi, right Pipsi? What was the outcome?

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Pipsi, we dont want yur bfriend to beet you up. Thats rude and uncalled for. Mebbe you could come to the sock hop were planning with the Jewish kids who go to the Bris school across the street from St. Welfares. The only problem is we cant have on a Friday nite because thats the nite they call "Savage" and they have to go home and lite candles and stuff. You shood here the grils when there leaving skool on Fridays. They say things like "Good Savage, Fern". I relly didn't think Fern was savage until Madeleine explained it to me. They also eat somethin called Holly Bread that night. If its anything like the brisket my uncle made last night, its really good stuff!

~Caldwell~

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Updated On: 9/12/04 at 03:10 PM

It would be soooo kewel to have Idina come to our sock hop!!!! Im gonna write to her and invitate her!!!! BTW: Did you know that there writing a follow-up to WICKED and there gonna call it WACK IT? I just know its gonna be amazing! (Do you think Idina's skin is really green? Or does she just make it turn that color for the show?)

~Caldwell~

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Updated On: 9/12/04 at 03:33 PM

Yesterday was Shabbos and I went to our synagogue. It is called Temple Beth Youismywomannow. The Rabbi there is a woman. I had never had a woman Rabbi before but I like her very much. She wear a tallis just like the men do. All the women over the age of 13 wear one. She says I should wear one too. Rabbi spoke about the bad thinbs that happened on 9/11. We said Kaddish for all the people that died then. It is a prayer you say to remember peope who have died. My mother is busy getting ready for Rosh Shaquannah. She has been baking fresh Challah. Caldwell calls it Holly.....but most genitals do. I am inviting him for dinner on that day. I kinda like him and I think maybe he likes me. It is hard because he is not Jewish. Fruma Sarah Titzlinger says I should not even be speaking to him because he is not Jewish and their god killed the Jews. I thought we all had the same one. But he seems to be a very nice boy. I started my diet today because that is my new years resolution. For breakfast I had 3 bagels with low fat cream cheese, lox, whitefish, herring and french toast. For lunch I had cheese blintzes with sour cream and a low carb Slimfast. ~~~~~~~~~~~Madeleine~~~~~~~~~~~

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Updated On: 9/12/04 at 04:36 PM

What is Matzo?? We don't have that at Saint Augustine's Catholic School :P We do get green mashed potatoes on Saint Patricks day though.

The Church of the Poison Mind is really named "The First Church of the Gooey Death and the Discount House of Worship For You Soul". It's located in Billings, Montana.

~Caldwell~

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Caldwell, I am so happy you are coming to synagogue with me on Thursday morning. Be ready about 9 am. This means you wont have to go to St Welfare's school that day. But I am sure Brother Purity wont mind. You get to wear one of those little hats called a kippah or yamulke. We do a lot of singing and praying im Hebrew, but there is always an English translation. WE also blow the chaffeur. It is a rams horn and it makes the most awsome sound! After services you can come back to our house. My Mom is making her famous brisket, potato kugel, chicken soup with kreplach and honey cake. We also have to have a green veggie, so she is serving pickles. We also have Challah. { NOT HOLLY}. It is also tradition for dip an apple in honey and eat it for a sweet year. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~Madeleine~~~~~~~~

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Updated On: 9/12/04 at 05:48 PM