Can The Adults Please Smoke? Part 26: Apparently They Can Drink, too!- Page 2

[shira467]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 1:47pm

I'll bring cookies. But not Cookie.

[YouWantitWhen????]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 1:49pm

Shira,

There are families that do not put a priority on college. Most of my friends went, but a couple just went to a JC and never finished.

For my family, there was never a doubt. We were going to college, and a good one at that, no ifs, ands or buts.

The same is not true for all families. Some families have businesses that need attention, or do not have a history of education. My mom was the first person to go to college in her family, but her sister did not.

I used to volunteer at a program with young, incarcerated offenders, and when talking to one guy (who had to be no more than 20) about his business, I tried to explain to him that if he used his clear intelligence for a legal end, he would do amazing. His response was basically that from his neighborhood, there was no view out via college. And, that he doubted he would be alive long enough to benefit, so why bother.

This was about 10 years ago.

I think it really is a factor of your culture, environment, and the expectations placed on you by the people around you.

And, Happy New Thread.

[shira467]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 1:50pm

That's what I'm learning, YWIW. I just wish everyone could get a good education.

[brdlwyr]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 1:51pm

I do not think that Cookie posts at all. And how about KMF? I miss him!

[shameless]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 1:53pm

It's probably a very long and complicated answer. But, I agree that the environment that you're raised in is a major factor.

My cousin, Chris, and I are the only 2 out of 25 first cousins to graduate from college. Hopefully, the second cousins will do better.

Like YWIW, from the time that I was old enough to know what college was, my parents made sure that I knew I was going. The same with my brother, but it turned out that it just wasn't for him and he didn't finish.

[DayDreamer]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 1:55pm

Meeting postponed and here I come with another unpopular opinion:

A good education is not exclusively based on going to college, or even what college you go to. You can go to Harvard and not learn squat, go to a community college and learn a lot more, and some people don't even go to college, like myself. Ok ... so eventually I did go to college, but only to get a piece of paper that said I could do what I had already been doing for years because that was the only way I could get a different job.

I was truly not cut-out for school. I had no idea what I wanted to be at that time, was bored out of my mind, and personally learned more by what I chose to do instead.

[DayDreamer]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 1:57pm

... and I will add that I always had my parents full support. They were a bit upset that I didn't go to University (which was free for me 'cause mom worked there) but also encouraged me 100% to be myself.

[shameless]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 1:58pm

I agree with 100%, DD. I don't think I really cared about or appreciated learning until after I graduated anyway.

And none of your opinions are unpopular around here. Even the wrong ones. Kidding!

[shira467]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 1:58pm

But at least it was an option and you had a choice.

[DayDreamer]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:00pm

That's true ... but I think we all do. If a kid truly wants to go to college, regardless of what the family says or their background, they will find a way. There are many cases of such kids. The ones that don't is because they give up and don't see a different way, like YWiW says.

[DayDreamer]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:07pm

... ok, two big subjects already and we're only on page 2. Can we sustain this without having our heads implode?

[D2]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:08pm

My parents started out with the intention that neither of us would go to college - my sister was supposed to get a job out of High School, get married, have kids, and I was supposed to get a blue-collar job and be happy.

They didn't count on either of us being who we are, and when my sister was a senior in HS, the principal of her school told my parents that she was college material and they'd be doing her a disservice if they didn't send her to college. I remember a lot of arguing back and forth but in the end my sister won and went to University. I remember my mother looking at me and saying "don't think that just because your sister's going to college that you will too." I looked up at her and in all my 8 year old "innocence" said "Wanna bet?"

Our relationship has been strained ever since. And I did go to college, needless to say.

[brdlwyr]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:09pm

In one family of my cousins - only two graduated from high school and all are productive members of society with good jobs. I am also fairly certain that my brother who did not go to college makes double my salary.

[YouWantitWhen????]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:10pm

DD, I met plenty of foolish people in law school. And, by no means does a college education equal common sense or intelligence.

For that matter, passing the bar exam is no indication of intelligence, or how good a lawyer you will be, just evidence of how well you take standardized tests.

I think one of the most amazing things an Obama Presidency can do is show those who think that they "can't" that it is in fact possible to be anything you dream of.

Something McCain said last night really bothered me - implying that we have equal access to education. Well, there may be access, but the qualify of that education varies wildly from community to community. And parents, as Obama has said, need to be held accountable as well - they need to be parents, and not friends to their children.

OK, off my soapbox. This childless adult who had the privilege of a good public eduction probably should just get back to work.

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:10pm

New thread? Yay!

And with a new thread comes the introduction of DGG's new boyfriend...yay again!

[shameless]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:13pm

Okay, where is he?

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:17pm

In class. I haven't seen him today, either.

I was just reading back...I'm putting myself through college. There isn't any way for my family to afford to help me. They have enough trouble putting food on the table as it is. My mother didn't think I'd be able to go. Whenever I call home, having a bad day, she says "Just remember: You got yourself into a great school all on your own. There's nothing you can't do."

[D2]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:18pm

She's right.

So. New boyfriend. Major? Year? What's he look like? Details. I want details.

[brdlwyr]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:23pm

Mrs. Brd has a major audition today. She is in a fairly severe funk and could use the ego boost - send positive vibes to Chi!

(and the money could pay tuition!)

[ALittleNorthofKansas]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:25pm

I have worked for 2 companies in my life where the owners didn't finish high school. One was brilliant in IT and the other just had a passion for his line of work. Actually both went out of their way to recruit the best and the brightest whether if be with college/university smarts or industry/life/street smarts.

Here in Canada I know companies are usually screaming for people in the trades or to do apprenticeships and in some markets they can't find them. There are probably too many young people here trying for college when there are other opportunties. I'm not sure why there is a perceived heirarchy of trades to college to university because as brdlwyr mentioned people may do better financially than their higher educated counterparts.

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:26pm

Freshman, from Long Island. Majoring in Bass Performance at the Hartt School.

[D2]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:29pm

Awww...

Have fun.

Find a business major for long-term, though. Pre-law maybe. Pre-med better.

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:30pm

I met a pre-med. He's an idiot.

[shameless]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:31pm

Yes, stay away from those crazy artistic types.

[bdwaygirl]

Posted: 10/16/08 at 2:33pm

DGG, is this the 2nd or third one? I'm losing track. Looks like a cutie!