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Horrible First Names

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#1

Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:22pm

How cruel are some parents? At my job, I recently saw 2 horrible names, where the parents obviously were smoking crack:

SH*Tterio
Kuntessa

What were they thinking?
#2

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:26pm

I saw someone the other day who named her daughter Algebra. Poor kid -- especially if she ends up sucking at math.
#3

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:27pm

This name isn't the worst ever, but due to the timing of when I first heard it sounds pretty bad:

Shokinnah (pronounced Shock-in-ah) - and I heard it right when the US launched that terrible Shock and Awe mission...

Parents just don't think.
Ostriches are rad. Like, really.
#4

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:28pm

Mandela. The worst part is that she's an adorable little girl.
Like a firework unexploded
Wanting life but never knowing how
#5

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:29pm

Apple
Pilot Inspector
when ducks grow thumbs then maybe my opinion will change.
#7

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:32pm

Moxie Crimefighter
Kal-El
Have I ever shown you my Shattered Dreams box? It's in my Disappointment Closet. - Marge Simpson
#8

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:33pm

Every time we get this subject come up, I have to single out the child of one Shannyn Sossamon:

Audio Science
Nothing precious, plain to see, don't make a fuss over me. Not loud, not soft, but somewhere inbetween. Say sorry, just let it be the word you mean.
#9

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:34pm

I also just ran across a name in one of our files where a male was actually named:

Lover.

Oy.
#10

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:37pm

i don't know anyone with horrible first names...but i HATE when parents don't take into account their own last names! like my dad's friend Charlie Farley (he goes by his middle name now) or a little kid i used to babysit Rudy Ruderman. C'mon, people!
www.kickfornick.com
#11

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:38pm

My friend Aiko always got a giggle out of the fact that her name literally means "love child" in Japanese.
#12

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:39pm

Remember how we all thought Gwyneth was the epitome of elegance and class (well, some of us - I always had my doubts, having seen her in action), until she named her child Apple?
Have I ever shown you my Shattered Dreams box? It's in my Disappointment Closet. - Marge Simpson
#13

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:41pm

I've always hated my first name, but it's all relative, I suppose.
And enjoy the beauty - all the joy and beauty - that a Merry Christmas can bring to you!
#14

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:42pm

You have a porntastic surname that more than makes up for it though.
Nothing precious, plain to see, don't make a fuss over me. Not loud, not soft, but somewhere inbetween. Say sorry, just let it be the word you mean.
#15

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:44pm

What is it with that name and porn?
And enjoy the beauty - all the joy and beauty - that a Merry Christmas can bring to you!
#16

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:44pm

who can say?
Nothing precious, plain to see, don't make a fuss over me. Not loud, not soft, but somewhere inbetween. Say sorry, just let it be the word you mean.
#17

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:47pm

Well, it's just that with the name, you expect your avatar pic to be dressed in plumber's overalls and responding to an 'emergency' call from a frustrated housewife.
...fragment of the day...
#18

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:48pm

Parks
"If it walks like a Parks, if it wobbles like a Parks, then it's definitely fat and nobody loves it." --MA
#19

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:51pm

I think I've posted this before, but I have two names for you to point and laugh at:

Crystal Chandelier

AND...


Lucious Titz


(Both of which were born in the hospital where my mother used to work as a labor and delivery nurse...in fact, I believe my mother may have delivered baby Lucious)


Oh geez.
Honey, I don't produce theater. I am theater.
#20

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:53pm

Dollypop always has good answers to this question. DP, where are you?
A work of art is an invitation to love.
#21

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:56pm

I remember reading somewhere that someone named their kid SH*Thead. Except it had some foreign pronunciation.
#22

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 3:58pm

Shi-THEED
Like a firework unexploded
Wanting life but never knowing how
#24

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 4:17pm

I knew an Israeli kid named Dor who came to the U.S. You can imagine how fun that was.
#25

re: Horrible First Names

Posted: 11/27/05 at 4:19pm

My babysitter when I was a little kid told me a story of how she knew a man named Ham...and his last name was burger. I was like, "you're full of sh!t."

Cookie is a weird name...I like it though. My friend's mom has the name Cookie..
"If it walks like a Parks, if it wobbles like a Parks, then it's definitely fat and nobody loves it." --MA

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