#1
Posted: 2/6/15 at 11:36am
This sort of thing is not uncommon. I hear gay guys all the time talking about how masculine they are, effectively setting themselves up for failure. The fact of the matter is that it's not especially masculine to be preoccupied with masculinity because a key part of masculinity is not being particularly preoccupied with anything. Masculinity just is. By virtue of the fact that you are a man who lives with another man, you are ensconced in masculinity. ("Ensconced" is masc word choice, right?) You don't have to prove anything. At some point, probably something that reads as very gay will probably come out of your mouth (or scalp—like a wave of bleached blonde hair), and that's OK. We're all complex people with lots of layers, and a lot of us have traits that would be considered both masculine and feminine. Self-acceptance is a process.
I get it, though. Growing up gay can be traumatizing. You have to make it right in your head when you feel like the world is telling you that it's wrong. A common but ultimately ****ty way to do that is to differentiate yourself in your head from the other gays, which is what Lance Bass did when he came out in 2006:
I want people to take away from this that being gay is a norm. That the stereotypes are out the window … I've met so many people like me that it's really encouraged me. I call them the SAGs — the straight-acting gays. We're just normal, typical guys. I love to watch football and drink beer.
OK, buddy. You do that in your wee top hat.
Lance Bass is masc, bro
I get it, though. Growing up gay can be traumatizing. You have to make it right in your head when you feel like the world is telling you that it's wrong. A common but ultimately ****ty way to do that is to differentiate yourself in your head from the other gays, which is what Lance Bass did when he came out in 2006:
I want people to take away from this that being gay is a norm. That the stereotypes are out the window … I've met so many people like me that it's really encouraged me. I call them the SAGs — the straight-acting gays. We're just normal, typical guys. I love to watch football and drink beer.
OK, buddy. You do that in your wee top hat.
Lance Bass is masc, bro
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