Young People are "The Entitlement Generation"...- Page 3

[robbiej]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 4:14pm

I remember when I was in school, if I ever did anything wrong (rarely, but still...I really was an angel), and my teacher informed my mother, I would immediately be in big trouble.

Now, I hear stories from teacher friends of parents who will show up and discuss what the TEACHER did wrong and how it's not the child's fault.

The world was a better place when it was known that children, though cute, are simply rotten little scheming liars that should live in fear of consequence.

[UglyBug]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 4:20pm

Okay here is something I want to point out:

Who buys these kids the games, cell phones, ipods, expensive clothing? I would say it's a whole generation of parents that don't have the balls to say no to their children. If you raise a kid on giving him everything he wants what the hell do you expect? It's the parents fault and then the kids. Kids don't raise themselves, they are influenced by the actions of adults around them. Adults who should know better!

I'm 20, I live in suburbia, my mom makes a very decent amount of money. When I was younger, we had a lot of toys, normal amount of clothes for a middle class kid, etc. But I think I've grown up pretty well, have been instilled with good values. I bought my own car, used, I buy my own clothes. My mother hasnt boughten me clothes since sr. year of high school. (And I'm not complaining). I work. When I have kids they are not going to be coddled, given cell phones when they are 12, given a new car when they are 16.

BUT don't shoot down a whole generation, and grossly generalize. Just b/c we grew up with more things doesn't mean the whole generation is spoiled and bratty, refusing to work for itself. (And just b/c a kid lives in suburbia and their parents can afford to buy them things doesn't make them a bad person!)

I have seen kids in my generation, a lot of them, that make me want to cry b/c they are such horrible people. But they are probably not any worse than the kids in the generation before them. After all what MORONS are raising these brats?

I have seen kids in high school who work their asses off at school, community service, and a job. But not many people see that, unless they specifically know them.

I know kids can be idiots, but that doesn't mean a whole generation is rotten.

[RobbO]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 4:21pm

if you think the 25 year old's of today are bad, just wait until my three nieces (ages 10, 8, and 5) grow up! i spent the weekend with them and was appalled (once again) at their behavior and even used the "entitlement" label on them.

every day for them is like their birthday - with "prizes," snacks and rewards for doing absolutely nothing. they are poorly behaved, rude, loud, and never listen to their mother. it's so sad to watch, and i wonder how my sister let them get this way and then get mad at any family member that has the gall to tell her how badly behaved her kids are!!

the scary thing is that their parents think they are "not that bad," and that there are "worse kids." yeah, in prison! WTF?!?

i know every generation thinks the world revolves around them but our society today is so shockingly rude - it's unbelievable. cell phone behavior is just the tip of the iceberg. we've seem to lost our way when it comes to interacting with each other and showing people common courtesy.

i cannot tell you how many times i've held the door for someone (young/old, male/female) to have the person never even acknowledge me, like holding the door for them is my job or something.

i don't see why we've let this become acceptable. "please" and "thank you" go a long way, and manners never go out of style.

[KelRel]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 4:21pm

I am sadly a member of the instant gratification generation and I HATE it. I had parents who doted on me and gave me everything I ever wanted as a child except for attention. I loved the cell phone and the new car etc..but what I really wanted was for them to spend some time with me. What really hit home was when I moved out, against their wishes and was pretty much cut off. I went from *poof* there is my latest heart's desire, to living on easy mac for a month so that I could make my car insurance payment. It was hard, and it still can be at times, but I am glad that I had to bum it for awhile. I go to school full time and am almost a senior in college. I work close to full time and I am married so I have all of the fun family stuff to juggle too. I have officially emancipated myself from the gimmie generation and have proudly joined the "Sure that would be nice, but bills and saving for a house come first" frame of mind. Parents need to spend more time and engery with their kids and teaching them about the value of money and that it is not the end of the world if you don't have the latest cell phone or if you get a hand me down car (If you are lucky enough to get a car at all). There are more important things in life and I want to go back in time and smack myself for not realizing that earlier.

[Millie42]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 4:28pm

"The world was a better place when it was known that children, though cute, are simply rotten little scheming liars that should live in fear of consequence. "

haha, interestingly put, Robbie.
But sadly this is true in some cases. I work part-time at a preschool during the school year and we have had many such instances.
For example, one child's mother was called for a meeting because her child was going crazy--never listening, yelling, hitting, writing on walls, cutting the comp mouse cord w/scissors, etc--and after she was told of his behavior (by several teachers) she said very seriously "I don't believe my son did that." end of story. This is of course followed by the child hitting his mom as she is dragging him out the door.
Same child, a few months later: he had messed up the wall kicking and drawing on it at naptime. The teacher very kindly asked the mother if she thought it would be good for him to clean the wall at the end of the day as his consequence, and the mother agreed. But, later in the day the father calls up yelling that "No son of mine is going to clean a wall!"

SERIOUSLY? No wonder they are greedy and spoiled! This child was only 4!

[UglyBug]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 4:31pm

Also

Everyone blames the media, video games, etc, for how pathetic some kids are today. No one ever points the finger back at the parents. I say IT's HIGH TIME to do that. Parents need to take responsiblity for their kid's actions. A kid can have a lot of "things" and still be a good decent person if their parents raise them that way.

But no that would be too hard for them to take responsiblity for the brats they raise.

[KelRel]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 4:34pm

I work with children during the summer. At our program we have a rule that says that no one can bring toys from home to camp. Well this one child continuously brought toys to camp. Not quiet toys either, no loud beeping ones that would not turn off. (Neopets make me mad to this day) After having them taken away numerous times and returned to him when his parents picked him up he kept bringing them. I finally spoke to his father about it and his father made me so angry! I told him about the child having the toys and his dad said, "Well other kids have toys!" I explained that we try to get all toys that are brought in but inevitably we will miss some, etc... He then went on to say that his son would never play with them during "class", but he did, that was the main problem. When I asked the child if it was true that I had had to talk to him numerous times during class about it he started to nod and say yes, but his father squeezed his shoulder so hard that the kid kind of yelped and then said no, you have never said anything to me in class before. The child was encouraged to lie to get out of trouble. Then his dad got in a name calling fit and started calling all of us toy nazis. It was hilarious afterwards, but at the time I was appalled that a parent would encourage their child to lie over something as stupid as bringing toys to camp. It was very sad and very pathetic.

[Millie42]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 4:35pm

Anybody else love Supernanny? The kids on that are just unreal.

[UglyBug]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 4:47pm

"Anybody else love Supernanny? The kids on that are just unreal."

I love that show!!! But it makes me not want to have kids. I would want to kill myself if I had such brats.

And does anyone else notice how uninvolved the dads are on that show? pathetic.

[KelRel]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 4:52pm

Does anyone else think that it is sickening the way that parents just let their children get away with anything? It embarassed me to death as a child, but when I was little my dad would go to my teacher and tell her that if I did anything wrong that she could spank me and that I would get it when I got home too. Looking back I know that it was an idle threat, but at the time it mortified and scared me to death. I was an angel (for the most part) in school because of it. Parents need to be more like that. I hate how now children will tell their own parents they will call the police on them for child abuse if they spank them. I was spanked as a child and I am fine, there is a fine line between spanking and beating and as long as that line isn't cross a good smack on the tush never hurt anyone.
Parents do not want to accept responsibility for their own actions as parents, they want to blame everything on schools or society or the media, when in all reality it is their own fault for not stepping up and being a good parent.

[Millie42]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 4:52pm

"I love that show!!! But it makes me not want to have kids. I would want to kill myself if I had such brats.

And does anyone else notice how uninvolved the dads are on that show? pathetic. "


It's the best of two worlds for me. I get the entertaining out-of-control children and I love Jo b/c, frankly, I'm a bit of an anglophile!

I imagine a good many of those kids are they way they are because their dads are so uninvolved. It's so much easier for the kids to walk all over one parent when they are the ones that I have to be the disciplinarian and the poor mom is unhappy, and tired, and desperate.

[Sporkie]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 4:58pm

This thread reminds me of "Gee, Officer Krupke" The trouble is they're indulged, the trouble is they're brats, the trouble is their parents, lets beat them up with bats. Krupke, we know all these kids are rats.

[RobbO]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 4:59pm

as for my sister and her husband, it is amazing how they work against each other. they undermine each other and all of their kids know it, and use it to their advantage. it is just so sad because i love my nieces but i cannot stand them and often don't visit my sister because the girls are so hard to take.

i blame the my sister and her husband, who does not do very much to help around the house with the kids. he justs wants to be the nice guy all the time and the hero of the kids, so that forces my sister into the "bad guy" role of making them bathe, brush their teeth, do homework, etc.

it's scary, and i fear for what my nieces will become...

[Mister Matt]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 5:29pm

As far a generation definition, Baby Boomers were born immediately following WWII (when the soldiers returned and the economy picked up) and Gen X-ers are children of Baby Boomers. My parents we born at the end of 1945, so my brother and I (born 1966 and 1969, respectively) are definitely Generation X.

So Diva, you probably are a Gen X. It's a tough fact to face, but there it is.

[LilMiZBroADwaY23]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 5:46pm

I'll admit it... I am spoiled little brat. My parents buy me stuff, yeah, expensive stuff? Not Louis Vuitton or Dolce and Gabbana. But nice stuff from the Gap and the Buckle. Do I have an iPod? Nope, but I do have a nice Samsung one that was a hundred dollars less.

My parents buy me stuff because they don't really trust me with my own money yet. They only give me enough money for gas and that's it. They only think I'm going to buy stupid ****... which is probably true.

But I have /always/ been taught to respect my parents, respect my elders, and be a polite teenager. I've grown up with privelage, but they always know how to bring me back down to Earth. I am not one of those people in the mall saying 'Mommy, Daddy! I want this!' In a whiney little voice. True, that used to be me when I was a kid... but they always said no. But now, I respect their opinion. If I don't need it, well then, I have other clothes to wear don't I?

My parents always told me that if I got in trouble at school, I would get twice in much trouble at home (Let's just say I haven't tested that theory and will not try it any time) and growing up I wasn't grounded. I was spanked, with a spatula. Yes... a hot, metal, spatula. Did I deserve it, totally. And it made me a more respectful person.

To this day I don't piss my parents off.

[justme2]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 6:06pm

admitted fan of the Nanny shows (both) and as an Aunt of 8 nieces and nephews all under the age of 7, I agree with Robbo! I watch with absolute horror as my nieces and nephews ABUSE their parents. Forget child abuse; it's been reversed with this upcoming generation!

There definetly is an air of entitlement with these little darlings; and I truly believe it begins in the cradle. These kids have "on demand" cartoons, tv's in their parents cars, each kid has a tv, PLUS DVD player in their rooms, and they EXPECT to rewarded for sitting at the dinner table.

The kids I nannied for had PERSONAL computers at age 4, electronic dictionaries and calculators be second grade, CD players around 7 years old (exchanged for IPod's when those came on the market), cell phones at ages 11 and 13, and let's not leave out the "normal" childhood toys, the obligitory X box and Nintendo gameboys.

I adore these kids, but did not adore the birthday parties for 40 plus kids (because they had to invite EVERY kid in class, boy scout or girl scout troop,etc) that were held at rock climbing activity centers, SF Zoo (with, of course, the night time tour and personal animal feedings), Trout fishing farms, etc.

And while I'm ranting, since when do kids need "goody bags" from a birthday party that are worth $20-30 dollars and have gift certificates in them? For a 7 year old???

[Rose_MacShane]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 6:11pm

See, this is why I could never be a nanny. I don't have the patience and the lack of dignity required.

Posted: 6/27/05 at 6:16pm

Im part of this generation and I personally think it sucks. Im go to school with kids who get every damn little thing they please while I have to work for it. I recently just got a job at the local Acme and I see kids like the other day this little girl screaming and calling her mother a liar and it makes me sad. Because when I was younger I was bratty when my parents wouldnt buy me anything but now that Im older I see that my parents work hard to get things for me and my siblings. It pisses off that their are rich kids out there like on Super Sweet Sixteen or Laguna Beach on MTV who get all the **** they want by whining. I say we take their credit cards and get them a job and a clue.

[justme2]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 6:19pm

Yeah...nothing's worse than dealing with snotty seven year olds expecting their damn gift certificate for attending a party!!

Well, there are worse things, but none in context with this thread!

I never nannied again, but with these kids, I loved them like my own. Maybe because they pratically were my own, considering the only time the kids saw mom and dad were at the extravegant parties thrown for "the kids".

[BluCat500]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 6:40pm

All hope is not lost I took care of a 3 year old last summer, who was the sweetest, most even tempered, unassuming little girl I had ever met. And this is a child whose parents were both quite succesful doctors...

I think this thread simply tends to bring out the worst examples, magnifying the ubiquity of the problem (which I do agree is a relevant issue) to a degree which it might not truly exist.

[shira467]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 6:49pm

A friend came over to my house and asked, incredulously, "You only have ONE television?" Sheesh.

I think I'm quite a bit like LilMiz, except I'm a bit older and never was spanked. I got a car for my 19th birthday. An '89 wagon, and my mother will attest I was so shocked, because I didn't expect it. At all. (Now, it's going to the chop shop, but that's a different story.)

When it comes to school, I had my parents come and vouch for me once. I'll admit it. Because I failed physical science. And I'd studied. And he wouldn't give me my test back so I could see the grade, nor my term paper, nor any validation that the grade I recieved was deserved. I had my parents call, and I may not have gotten an A, but it was proven that I passed the class.

In my senior year, I recieved a C on a paper. I went to the teacher and explained that this paper was horrendous - what can I do to do better? And she looked at me like I was from Mars. What, admitting to not meeting expectations? That's shocking? I wanted to improve!

I have many things handed to me, but when I got to college I had many things covered (dorm, meal plan, 1/2 books) - but that's it. "Shira, you want money? Get a job!" And I did. It taught me real quick about budgets and control and debt (and damn taxes!).

Here's what frustrated me: As the only person in my suite who worked, I was the only one who picked up the toilet paper, and who, on occasion, picked up bagels and cream cheese for my suitemates. Why? Because it was the nice thing to do. Godforbid, when I asked someone to pick me up something, and I didn't have the cash ready, Ms. I-have-a-750/month-budget-from-Daddy responded "I can't afford it right now." What was I asking for? A bagel. Literally. What, 50 cents? She came home that day with 3 bags from Barneys. I was infuriated and at the same time saddened by her.

I've never gotten an internship or job because Daddy helped me. I get it because I work hard at school for the grades, and I have the work ethic for a job. (Do I have one now? No. But I'm looking).

I am a bit jealous of my friends who have everything handed to them on a golden platter -- but I also know when we all grow up, I'll be able to live life a bit easier, and won't go into shock when I graduate college and have to pay bills.

*end of rant*

[justme2]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 6:57pm

Spanked? I would have preferred that to the beatings that my siblings and I received! Funny enough though, when friends of mine get together, we all (children of the 70's that is) have similar "you ONLY got spanked?" stories to share!

We never considered it abuse until we see what children today get away with! If I had ever hit my parents, yelled back at them, or simply didn't "stop" whatever I was doing wrong, I wouldn't be here typing this post!

I cringe when I watch that nanny show...my friends and I refer to it as the "Children who need to be Euthanized....and the parents who created them" show!

[shira467]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 7:08pm

I admit, spanking aside, when I was teaching preschool some of these children needed to be grabbed by the arm and spoken too very sternly. But I couldn't do that, because it was considered abuse.

[Plum]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 7:32pm

Then just out of curiosity, what exactly are you supposed to do when a kid actually runs away from the room? I've TAed preschool classes and had that situation, and some point you need to grab the kid around the waist or you're going to be chasing them forever.

[KelRel]

Posted: 6/27/05 at 10:10pm

I work with children and if they are causing a danger to themselves or to others then it is OK to restrain them. You can grab them hard or yank them, but I have had to grab a child by the waist and life them from the ground to keep them from running off or getting in a fight or throwing a chair, etc...I have had bruises all over me, been bitten, spit on, cursed at called names, had a chari thrown at me, scratched, you name it. I feel bad for the kids who do this though. I mean if they feel the need to act out in such a manner what can their home life be like? Its so sad and I have come home from work in tear from what these kids have told me (and as required by law and moral conscience I reported any abuse to the proper authorites) and I will never forget them.