Your Favorite WILL & GRACE Quotes- Page 3

[tagiunagi]

Posted: 5/28/06 at 2:44am

Grace: Well you're barely gay.
Will: I am plenty gay.
Grace: When was the last time you had same-sex sex?
Will: I'm choosey!
Grace: You're straight! Go watch a basketball game!

[mominator]

Posted: 5/28/06 at 10:22am

Karen to Will: "Honey you can't work down here. All you see all day are people's bad shoes. LOOK, Nine West!"

[hannahshule]

Posted: 5/28/06 at 11:29am

The one where Karen pretends to be a maid in order to get a hot Hotel staffer.

Fervent Proletariat Hot Worker: I'll get us some mayonnaise... the mayonnaise of THE PEOPLE!

[Silence = Death]

Posted: 5/28/06 at 1:23pm

(Will and a police officer are at a gay bar trying to find the gay laptop thief...and this is from memory, so bare with me)

Will: It's him! He's at a gay bar eating a hot dog with no irony!

[RENTingFAME]

Posted: 5/28/06 at 1:45pm

Back in the day when Will and Vince were together... Vince is taking a shower:

Grace: He's been in there for ever!
Will: He's gay and Catholic. He may never feel clean.

[tagiunagi]

Posted: 5/29/06 at 2:54pm

JACK: [INTO THE MICROPHONE] Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. I am your host for this evening, Jack McFarland. Hello. And to honor those of you who have traveled so far from Great Britain to be with us here tonight, I'll be translating my remarks into English.

JACK: And now... for their first dance as husband and wife...

JACK: [WITH BRITISH ACCENT] And now, for their first donce as husband and wife...

JACK: Please welcome to the fabulous Caesars ballroom...

JACK: [WITH BRITISH ACCENT] Please welcome to the fabulous Caesars bollroom...

JACK: Mr. and Mrs. Lyle Finster.

JACK: [WITH BRITISH ACCENT] Mr. and Mrs. Lordy-loo Bumbershoot.

[RENTingFAME]

Posted: 5/29/06 at 3:03pm

Jack and Karen talking about getting Will and Grace back together after a fight:

Jack: Pretend to think pretend to think pretend to think...

Karen: Pretend to care pretend to care pretend to care...

************************

Karen: *seductively* There will be a big cake there...
Grace: *in a little kid voice* I do like a good cake...

Posted: 5/29/06 at 3:10pm

Jack: For your information, most people who meet me do not know that I am gay.
Will: Jack, blind and deaf people know you're gay. Dead people know you're gay.
Jack: Grace, when you first met me, did you know I was gay?
Grace: My dog knew.


Karen: Hey Poodle.
Jack: Who's your daddy?
Karen: You are.
--[Jack is angry with Karen]---
Karen: Hi, poodle.
Jack: Mm. How are you?
[to Grace]
Jack: Hi, Grace. Who's your daddy?
Grace: [confused] His name is Martin Adler.

[tagiunagi]

Posted: 5/29/06 at 3:45pm

WILL: Wow. Well... maybe it's just as well you never did take a ride on the Truman train. That coulda ruined you for life.

LEO: Train? You had one passenger.

WILL: Yes, but at least she got off.

[hannahshule]

Posted: 5/29/06 at 3:56pm

Grace or Will: Jack's mom doesn't know he's gay
Karen or Grace: What is she, headless?

[Dancinqueen123]

Posted: 5/29/06 at 3:56pm

Mrs. McFarland (Jack's mom): [to Jack] Well, you always were very fond of the nursery rhyme, 'Rub-a-Dub-Dub, Three Men In A Tub.'

[RAPP'unzel]

Posted: 5/29/06 at 4:04pm

Michael Douglas [to Will]; Place: A gay bar, while waiting for a "notebook thief"
- You have sedating eyes like two inviting pools of chocolate pudding -

[dotmarie]

Posted: 5/29/06 at 4:19pm

Grace: Hey, where'd you get gum?
Will: Oh, sorry. (takes half the gum from his mouth and puts it in Grace's)

Grace: Look at me.. I'm a friggin bombshell.

Karen: What?! I ain't changing my name. I like my name. Carol--
Will & Jack: Karen.
Karen: Texas Ranger.
Will & Jack: Walker.

[secondstar05]

Posted: 5/29/06 at 4:21pm

Grace: You know what my Aunt Pescha would say if she were in this room right now?
Will: "Why the hell did my parents name me Pescha"?


Will: Grace, go to bed. You obviously have had a very busy day of crazy.


Will: Ow.
Grace: What?
Will: Could we talk about your toenails?
Grace: I'm sorry. I'll cut them.
Will: Don't you need them for tree climbing and warding off predators?


Karen: By your inflection I can tell that you think what you're saying is funny, but... No.


Karen: Hey, are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Jack: I don't know, are you thinking what it would be like to have Spiderman spray his web on you?


Jack: Heterosexual marriage is just wrong. I mean, if God had meant men and women to be together, he would have given them both penises.

Jack: Will, the sweetest thing just happened. The lady on the elevator said we were a cute couple.
Stuart: Well, actually she said, "Stop making out or the fires of Hell will consume you."

[tagiunagi]

Posted: 5/29/06 at 4:25pm

Jack: Are you telling me you intend to know a married man in the biblical sense? And in the vagina?

[dotmarie]

Posted: 5/29/06 at 4:39pm

Karen: I love my big gay horse!


Jack: She's pretty upset. I've never actually seen Grace run from a cake.


[Rosario is in bed after pulling a muscle; she & Karen are on the phone]
Karen: Oh, honey I'm sorry. Can I get you anything?
Rosario: Actually, I could use a bowl of sou-- (Karen hangs up)

[tagiunagi]

Posted: 5/29/06 at 4:39pm

From the Kevin Bacon episode...

Jack: Hmm, new plant in living room. Must be gift from studio wooing "La Bacon" to do Hollow Man II.

From an outtake from the Kevin Bacon episode...

Kevin: When the stalkers leave, it's the first sign your career is slipping. The second is when you're a guest star on Will & Grace.

[RENTingFAME]

Posted: 5/30/06 at 12:13am

I <3 this thread... it's perfect for making me feel better when i'm angry!

[RENTingFAME]

Posted: 5/30/06 at 12:21am

Jack, telling Guapo to leave.

Jack: Shoo! Shoo! Shoes! That's what I can get tomorrow~

Jack: Now Guapo, the closet's not that bad... Will was in there for 20 years!

Karen: (to Jack) I saw you smile when I fired that salesgirl...

Karen: There's only one thing I can give you to make up for this...
Jack: Your love?
Karen: No! A boat!

[RENTingFAME]

Posted: 5/30/06 at 1:20am

Grace: You know what my Aunt Pescha would say if she were in this room right now?
Will: "Why the hell did my parents name me Pescha"?
Grace: No, she would say *eye of shame*
Will: What was she, a Yiddish mime?

[secondstar05]

Posted: 5/30/06 at 1:22am

Ahhh, I saw the episode with that "Pescha" quote again today. Such a good one.

[M J R]

Posted: 5/30/06 at 1:30am

Karen: "Good Lord. I can't believe I'm at a public pool. Why doesn't somebody just pee directly on me?"

[RENTingFAME]

Posted: 5/30/06 at 1:37am

Yeah, secondstar it was just on WGN... I was watching it too. :) Made me smile all the more.

[Dre2387]

Posted: 5/30/06 at 8:44am

i would love to see the episode with Jack high on caffeine. and he has the whole speech that goes like twenty miles a minute. hilarious!

[RENTingFAME]

Posted: 5/30/06 at 11:09am

Hahaha... Me too. I think I actually haven't seen that one! *gasp*