Favorite/Funniest Beginning of Show Warnings — Page 3

there's a youtube warning for legally blonde? what is it (yeah im seeing it wednesday but if they took it out i still want to know what it is)

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OH, I forgot to mention my ABSOLUTE FAVORITE preshow announcement:

"Please remember to turn off all cell phones, beepers, watch alarms, radar detectors, egg timers, electric shavers, and anything else that would make a distracting noise during the show."

Is there any funny cellphone annoucnements in LITTLE MERMAID? Maybe something like:

"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, as a courtesy to the creatures of the deep, we kindly request that you turn off your cellphones, beepers, watch alarms, and iPods, as well as refrain from using any photography or recording, especially since none of those devices would work underwater anyhow. And for this performance, the orchestra will be conducted by ______ _________!"

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DRS and Spamalot had/have good ones.

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Mamma Mia!- something like: "Warning, this show contains strobe lights, spandecks, and really high heels, so those faint of heart, please leave."

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My favorite was when I worked at the Delacorte during Henry V. They had an actor on stage with a camera taking pictures of the audience, then the assistant theater manager would ask him to stop taking photos, he wouldn't. Then she would "confiscate" his camera. It was funny to watch because the schtick between them would change every night. Sometimes the actor would be so obnoxious to her just to get her reaction. The otehr good one was the Seagull when there was an anouncement made that con edison was testing new technology and if a cell phone went off during the show the owner would be electrocuted.

When I saw DRS in St. Louis, they had a a couple of swings on and such so they listed them.

And they had the guy playing Freddy do the announcement and it went something along the lines of:

"Hi. So, we're gonna start. As soon as you SHUT YOUR TRAPS. Okay, now, since this is the theatre, we ask you turn off your cell phones, pagers, and all that jazz *starts humming*. Also, may we remind you that this is ALL COPYRIGHTED! NO cameras. No audio or video recording. It is illegal. If you do record the show, your recording will rock. But you're an idiot. Thank you for your time. Now, sit back, shut up, and listen. Cause now WE'RE the center of attention-NOT YOU!"

*Overture begins*

At SD they said that he ad libbed the entire announcement. Supposedly they wrote down a basic "Turn off cell phones" but he added some to it. It was hilarious.

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I loved Cyrano de Bergeracs's. It was something like
"Please remember that swords are used in this production, so don't use any cellpones, cameras, or video rcording devices."

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When I saw it, November didn't have one. Just the ushers saying to turn them off when you went in. I was a little disappointed. I'd hoped for something like "This is the President..." Or at least Hail to the Chief in the background or something.

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Spamalot's is very funny

Jordangirl I was hoping for the same thing! When I saw November 2 weeks ago I was awaiting an announcement from Nathan Lane haha

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A play i wrote which opened in a fringe festival in the UK last year called '3sum' (an updated twiat on 70s sex comedies) had a great pre show announcement

"Ladies and gentleman welcome to tonights performance of 3sum, may i take a moment to remind you that the use of camera recording equipment is strictly encouraged and we urge you to post it on you tube as we need all the publicity we can get.
Also note that whilst the cast do not condone having a 3sum they did all research with each other and now are not returning each others calls so F**k knows who is in the cast tonight.
So sit back, relax, set the toys to vibrate and enjoy the show "

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I thought it was hilarious at GLORIOUS ONES when they said "photography is not permitted, but you may paint in oils."

Also, the I AM MY OWN WIFE in German was unique and funny at the time. Others have copied that now.
The Ahrens & Flaherty website

At a local production of 'This Wonderful Life' the announcement started with the 'everytime a bell rings an angel gets their wings' speech, then switched to the voice of Daddy explaining that it isn't always true. That nowadays, when a cell phone goes off an angel dies. I think there was something else, but that's all I can remember.