You know, I'm actually a little impressed! Didn't expect this. It needs fine-tuning and if you were doing this as an official job, they're going to have you change some colors, move the Nederlander logo and decrease its size, and add the credits, but otherwise the concept is very nice!!
No one loves this show more than me... but that just doesn't work for my eyes. Maybe it's the checkerboard that pushes it over the edge?
I don't see the problem with the original art the way it is so I guess any changes or mock-ups like this I would find lacking. Just me. Good effort, either way.
P
I like it-pretty good graphic design. I don't know what the show is about, but I think I get the gist from your design, and that's what counts!
Broadway Legend Joined: 7/22/07
I really like it. IMO, if you took out the checkerboard and added a white plane in the top right hand corner, it would be amazing.
I think there's a little too much going on. The KISS premise might be a better way to go.
I like it, but, as others have stated I'm not really getting the checkerboard.
For someone who was so quick to criticize the "La Cage" artwork, I'd say you're pretty effing bold to post this hot mess on the internet.
Needs work.... a lot of work.
Ok La Cage was professionally made. I'm 15 and I was bored.
I have no desire to embarrass you, especially publicly, but here are my comments as a professional designer/marketing director:
There is nothing original about the arrows you have used for the title of the show - they were used on the book cover that was printed at the time of the movie's release as well as in promotional materials for the film.
As has been mentioned, the Nederlander logo is too large and is placed in an awkward position.
The font used for "Catch it" - a good tag line - doesn't work with the font used for the title of the show, and it is virtually the same size. I don't know where to look, so as a consumer I will be confused - what is the name of the show? Where is it playing? What the hell is that big N thing? What is this about?
It basically tells me nothing, nor does it intrigue me enough to find out.
Whatever you may think of the LA CAGE... logo, it is all of a piece and works as a strong branding image for the production.
That said, you do seem to have a flair for graphic design but you have a lot to learn, especially about informational hierarchy and typography.
I would suggest you take a few courses geared for HS students. Check out F.I.T's "Saturday Live" program. You might discover something about your own talents, and have some fun as well.
For 15, you show a lot of potential. I hope you continue your interest in art.
Messy
Messy and bad. Don't bash a FANTASTIC design, like "La Cage", and then expect to receive some type of praise from me (regardless of age).
xoxo
aasjb-please just go on with your art. I hope you're getting some classes because you've got the eye. This isn't the best place to get objective or educated opinions.
I taught art and photography for 25 years.
It's terrible from a lot of standpoints. A tagline like "Catch It" should never be bigger and more prominent than the title of the show. You've also rendered it almost impossible to read and in a too divergent font style from the title treatment.
The Nederlander "N" is way too huge and prominent and theatre information doesn't belong in the middle of an ad. Everyone has been trained to look at the bottom of the ad for that information. People care first about the show itself and then want to know where it's playing. You don't throw that info at them simultaneously.
The maroon and checkerboard pattern seem to belong to a different ad.
Nicht gut.
I don't want to discourage you by critiquing your artwork itself, but I do want to encourage you to explore this talent if it's something you're interested in.
When I was your age I spent my bored moments in class doodling logos for shows I was in. I didn't know about the emerging digital tools for graphic design and wasn't a good enough illustrator to succeed in standard art classes, so it was just a hobby I kept to myself.
17 years later, I make a few thousand dollars a year designing artwork like this for a niche market of high schools and community theaters. I don't make my living as a graphic artist and I will never work for a big agency like Serino-Coyne or SpotCo, but my clients are happy with what I do and I get to be a part of the creative process for a lot of productions.
No, this spec art is not going to be picked up by the producers and plastered all over Times Square, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't keep trying.
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