"In an Open Relationship" — Page 2

I would like to try one...I think I wouldn't mind my BF sleeping around, as long as I know he comes home to me. That's just my thought, I don't have time or energy to have sex everyday, so it would benefit me.

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Updated On: 11/11/10 at 04:23 AM

I have been with my guy for 5 years and we are in an open relationship, it's something that works well for us. We have seen so many of gay friends who are couples finish a relationship because of cheating. It sounds awful but the majority of gay people cant seem to keep it in their pants lol. We have eliminated that problem. I love him more than the world and we have many rules about what we can do, what we cant do etc. We would never stay overnight with someone for example, we never meet that person more than twice and so on and so on. To be fiar its something we dont even take advantage of that much, we just know it's there.

Sex is one part of a relationship, everything in ours is beyond perfect, but also sometimes they may be things he wants to try in the bedroom or i do and the other is not in to it, instead of supressing what we want to do we can do it.

Wow that was personal lol

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If you can't expect him to follow the "Don't f*** anyone else" rule, how do you expect him to follow the "only once" or "no sleepovers" rule?

Updated On: 11/10/10 at 10:22 AM

If he can't "expect" him to follow a don't sleep with anyone else rule? Do you mean "have sex with" when you say "don't sleep with"? Because when there is no expectation of sexual monogamy, then there is no rule there to break.

And if the agreed upon parameter is "you don't stay over at somebody else's house" it would be pretty obvious if the partner did that, no?

As for any other parameters, a person in a non-monagamous relationship has to agree that honest discussions happen and that their primary relationship always comes first.

Doodle, I was in a monogamous relationship and was surprised to find it was perfectly reasonable to me. The point is honesty and openness and not expectation, heartbreak based on rule-breaking, and judgmentalism.

People should only do what they're comfortable with.

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I'm not sure telling the other person really is key.

I've been in a relationship with doodle's guy for about 12 years now, and I'm pretty sure he was never told about it.

You, too?

You too? Damn him, he said I was the only other one! That four-timing bastard!

Yep. Nice back side Doodle, by the way.

I was just curious about this. I've never been in an open relationship and it's something I don't know that I could be comfortable with. It's so foreign to me. I told my friend (in the open relationship) that relationships are meant for two people the other night--and reflecting on that, I realized that I shouldn't have said that. Whatever a couple wants to do--that's their prerogative. It's not something I'm looking to do, but people can do what works for them. I realized that my belief that this doesn't make sense is like somebody telling me that marriage should only be between a man and a woman. I don't think an open relationship would be for me, but apparently it works for others and they can do that if it works for them.

I gave this a LOT of thought the other night.

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Yeah, whatever works. Everyone is different.

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Then you have nothing to lose

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I was pondering the subject myself recently as part of a wide-ranging discussion after a viewing of "Company."

I find it refreshing that this thread is a place where people feel comfortable talking about creative arrangements (or more traditional ones) that work for them. Especially nowadays, with what can only be termed the "rush to prove our normalcy" that is the quest for marriage among same sex couples.

I know the argument is often presented that "we're just like you, we want the exact same things you want," when really, we are free to create the relationships we desire, however non-normative they may be.

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