Serious Discussion-Stress and Psych Disorders- Page 18

[NYadgal]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:33am

Sex and the Single Girl (with tongue firmly planted in cheek)...

Interesting topic.

Updated On: 1/27/06 at 08:33 AM

[beacon1]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:37am

*gives SOMMS a "time out"*

[SonofMammaMiaSam]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:38am

No.

[NYadgal]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:38am

Hmmm.... I'm trying to think of something worthy of a Friday.

I love the varied topics that have been covered so far, and all of the participation from such a diverse group of people!

Great thread!

[bwaysinger]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:38am

The title is serious discussion, SOMMS!
But we could talk about the changing role of marriage/single status in the US today. It's certainly not very taboo to be single/unmarried for far longer these days...

[beacon1]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:40am

*looks up from her deck of Old Maid cards*

[SonofMammaMiaSam]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:42am

*takes his turn at Chutes and Ladders*

[bwaysinger]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:45am

Seriously, guys, seriously. I really didn't create this thread to become just like the rest of them.
I'm not trying to be snarky, but either contribute to the topic at hand (or the creation of the topic) or don't post. Please.

[SonofMammaMiaSam]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:48am

The Effect of Coffee Deprevation on a Sense of Humor.

[bwaysinger]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:50am

Well, I suppose it was a nice thread while it lasted.
Enjoy your jack, guys.

[beacon1]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:50am

Sorry, Mister Singer. I wasn't sure if that truly was the topic today.

If it is, it certainly is one close to my heart. I'm a single woman...a single LDS woman in a Church which is very family-orientd.

[NYadgal]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:52am

Some facts:

During the 1950s the men and women born and raised during the depression and the war years came of age. They married sooner than any other cohorts who have reached adulthood in the twentieth century before or since. About three-fourths of the women born in 1930 to 1934 were married by age twenty-three; in contrast, women born twenty years earlier or later were two or three years older before three-fourths of them were married. Moreover, the long-term rise in divorce affected those who came of age in the 1950s less than some other cohorts. In addition, more of the women in the paternal generation of the 1950s had two or more children than did the women in either their parents’ or their children’s generations. The distinctive family patterns of the young adults of the 1950s suggest that when we look for explanations of the postwar trends, we should examine the experience of growing up in the depression and war years.

As for the children of the 1950s - who were born during the baby boom and who reached adulthood in the 1960s and 1970s - they, too, have been distinctive in some respects. To be sure, their pattern of marrying has been more like the typical twentieth-century pattern than was the case for their parents’ generation. But in the 1980s, women’s average age at marriage rose beyond the twentieth century high. And since 1970 there has been a great increase in cohabitation prior to and after marriages. These recent changes suggest that the place of the institution of marriage in American society may be changing.

Moreover, the lifetime levels of divorce for persons who married in the 1960s and 1970s will increase beyond what we would expect from the long term trend. Rates in the 1980s, although stable, still imply that about half of all marriages begun in the mid 1970s will end in divorce or separation. Most of those who divorce will live with a partner and eventually marry, creating an unprecedented number of unions in which one partner or both has been previously married.

[DG]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:52am

Beacon - do you feel pressure because of that situation?

[SonofMammaMiaSam]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:52am

As was I (being serious). My dating/relationship experience has been like a game of Chutes and Ladders--many ups and downs with the overriding threat of not winning in the end.
Updated On: 1/27/06 at 08:52 AM

[beacon1]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:53am

Did I just kill this?

It's not "taboo" in our society to be single anymore or to single parent. In fact, sometimes those choosing to get married get a lot of guff from folks. An odd turn of events.

[DG]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 8:59am

I don't know if we've settled on this topic, but I just want to take this opportunity to say that I don't like the concept of government recognized marriage - it's basically nothing more than social engineering, to my mind. People ask if I'm for gay marriage, and I answer that I'm against all marriage - at least as something that the government has anything to do with.

I see no reason to treat individual members of society differently simply based on whether they are married or not. The coersion into choosing that kind of life is way to anti-Libertarian for my blood.

[SonofMammaMiaSam]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 9:03am

Siamese, I tell you! Joined at the brain. I just had this exact conversation with my sister. The fact that it was at my parents 50th wedding anniversary made it interesting, to say the least.

[beacon1]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 9:04am

DG,

Good question. I'm not sure pressure is what I feel. I do feel lonely at times when I see the families sitting together. But many of those families are single parent as well due to divorce or death. And, I know that being married is not a guarantee of bliss or a buffer against loneliness.

The Church is very careful to remind us that we all have worth and should take care of each other regardless of marital status.

It just feels like a longing sometimes that make my heart feel sad. Marriage and family are highly valued and I still hope they are something I can enjoy in this life.

However, I do not feel less valued. I serve in many callings (volunteer positions) and have served in leadership capacity. I've always feel like my opinion counts and has an impact.

As for society in general, I see more focus on single-ness than on marriage.

[beacon1]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 9:06am

And, I do long for a permanent companion and would want the marriage covenant. Part of that comes from my religious beliefs and other from an innate longing I have.

[DG]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 9:11am

Beacon - that is one of the most beautifully worded posts I have read on this board. Thank you.

and SOMMS, I can only imagine!

[beacon1]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 9:21am

Thanks, DG.

That compliment means so much coming from someone as eloquent as yourself. :o)

[beacon1]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 9:22am

Mr. Singer...we need a change on the title of the thread so folks will know to come to the new discussion.

[SonofMammaMiaSam]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 9:24am

At the age of four I put my hands on my hips and declared to my parents, "You people need to get divorced, this isn't working for me." Obviously my viewpoint on marriage was skewed at an early age.

(But, what do I know, we just celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary)
Updated On: 1/27/06 at 09:24 AM

[DG]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 9:29am

The only things I've ever heard is that it's a) supposed to provide a stability to society, or b) it's supposed to foster the 'makin' babies' process. I think we get a clue now as to how stable it's made things, and I have a feeling that babies are going to get made no matter what.

[NYadgal]

Posted: 1/27/06 at 9:49am

Well, a discussion about the changing place of the institution of marriage has to include an awareness of the changes in traditional male and female roles, and the growth of women in the workplace. There are significant economic and political aspects to it.

There are, obviously, many points to be made about the state (or lack thereof) of same-sex marriage laws...