Worst Broadway Lyric ever?- Page 14

[bigrab1018]

Posted: 3/17/06 at 3:40pm

From "Popular":

Think of it as personality dialysis
Now that I've chosen to becaome a pal-a-sis-(ter...)

[jasonf]

Posted: 3/17/06 at 4:03pm

Uh - Josh -- blows DO glance, as in "he landed a glancing blow in the fight." It's like when you barely hit someone - so if the woes are fleeting, then the blows would be glancing. It's not the greatest lyric, but it does make sense.

[Shoshana's Future Ex]

Posted: 3/17/06 at 11:24pm

From Caroline or Change:

Washing Finish,sweet and wet and coo-o-ool.
My daily task is doooooooone!

[nelliecollins]

Posted: 3/17/06 at 11:46pm

"Oh Noah
You go-ah
All the way back to the protazoa."
from Children of Eden.

Most of the lyrics to "Come Look at the Freaks" from SideShow.

And another vote for "Leave your cheese to sour" from Pippin.

[buffyactsing]

Posted: 3/17/06 at 11:49pm

I think those Popular lyrics are kind of clever, internal rhyming.

[Caroline-Q-or-TBoo]

Posted: 5/22/06 at 3:54pm

I sorta like CoC lyrics

[JustABroadwaybaby2]

Posted: 5/22/06 at 5:29pm

That whole "cold feet" song in Drowsy, and Her is, from PJ game. i think the reason why some of these lyrics are SO bad, is because people can't find good enough words to rhyme with each other.

[Caroline-Q-or-TBoo]

Posted: 5/22/06 at 5:30pm

Beat My Dog

[Crazy_for_the_Q]

Posted: 5/22/06 at 8:47pm

I can't believe no one's metioned "Bread" from The Baker's Wife.

I can't rememer all of it but jeezy creezy there's a line in there that's like "it's an orgy for the nostrils".. give me a break. The rest of the song is equally bad. Half the time they are just repeating bread, bread, bread.

Awfuuuul

[Emcee4ever]

Posted: 5/22/06 at 9:07pm

Yay! Nothing from Cabaret! :)

I think the worst lyrics are to Something Bad in Wicked. All of it.

[sondheimboy2]

Posted: 5/22/06 at 9:20pm

Isn't this thread a little pointless?

As the old saying goes "one man's meat is another man's poison."

I mean, there are people out there who actually like "Jekyll/Hyde"!

[Caroline-Q-or-TBoo]

Posted: 5/22/06 at 9:24pm

for your cringing pleasure:

Beat My Dog by: Jay Leonhart

You beat my dog
You eat my frog
You drink up all my gin
You bay at the moon
You sleep till noon
And you never tell me where you been

I buy you clothes
I fix your nose
I steal you ruby things
You break the rules
You pee in pools
You do outrageous things


Oh baby
I lie, I cheat, I steal, I cry for, baby
Oh baby,
I'd lay down my life and die for you, baby

You take my car,
You drive so far
You come back with the tank on E
Your hair all messed
And you half-dressed
And you just look at me

You out all night
You come home tight
You fall down on my bed
And there you lay
For all the next day
For all I know your dead



Now, listen, friend
this has got to end
we got to have ourselves a talk
things got to change
got to rearragne
or somebody gonna take a walk

now i ain't one
to put down fun
but this time you've gone too far
you smoke my hash
you spend my cash
who the hell you think you are!?

you beat my dog
you eat my frog
you drink up all my gin
you bay at the moon
you sleep till noon
and you never tell me where you been

i don't know why
i even try
to change the status wuo
'cause you break the rules
you pee in pools
but still i love you so
pretty baby, still i love you so.


*bows*

[beav]

Posted: 5/22/06 at 10:42pm

My vote goes to:

This is the moment,
This is the time,
When the momentum and the moment
Are in rhyme!

Seems like Leslie Bricusse let a 4 year old write some of these lyrics. Oh and Stephen Schwartz really needs to buy a new rhyming dictionary...

[StageManager2]

Posted: 5/23/06 at 3:27am

First of all, I'm sick of people repeating the Nessa/confess-a lyrics. Read the entire thread and you'll know that he's not saying confess-a. Same goes for the "cut the plate" lyric from RENT. One more thing, T.S. Eliot was not British, per se. He was originally an American born in St. Louis who became an Anglophile and relocated to London. He's as much British as is Elizabeth Taylor who was born in England to American parents and lived there until she was six or seven, or at the start of WWII, then moved back to the security of America, specificaly California.

[scooter38432]

Posted: 5/23/06 at 7:48am

Oooh. So many from which to choose...

MISS SAIGON
"That marine wants his beer."

All of JEKYLL & HYDE

So much of SIDESHOW
"She's raising my Farehnheit"

[ruthiefan_felix]

Posted: 5/23/06 at 8:11am

The whole Jerry Springer the opera, I mean 'Mama give me smack in the a**hole, mama give me smack in the a**' I mean COME ON! And all those fxxk you, fxxk you back... jesus christ, it was one theatre experience I had there!

I wudnt say Cats as they just put music to the poems so it's not TS Eliot's fault (in fact I love his poems)

Phantom - ew

Avenue Q - another musical's lyrics I cant stand!

[trikaraokeidol]

Posted: 5/23/06 at 4:50pm

From EVITA ("Buenos Aires"):

Give your lover the very best
Real eiderdown and silence.

Sad.

[WiiCKED x3]

Posted: 5/23/06 at 5:03pm

Avenue Q. And Cats.

Cats has the worst lyrics iv'e probably have ever heard in my LIFE.

Avenue Q, I honestly hate the whole show.

[StageManager2]

Posted: 5/24/06 at 3:38am

trikaraokeidol, in response to your post regarding "Buenos Aires" lyrics: what is sad about them" You forgot to includethe three lines preceding the three you posted.

And if I ever I go too far
It's because of the things you are
Beautiful town I love you
And if I need a moment's rest
Give your lover the very best
Real eiderdown and silence

Eva is talking about how much she'll be taken in by the big city that she'll act literally like a kid in a candy store, trying to experience everything at once and overdoing it. But when she finally rests, the city will provide her with "real eiderdown" (which is a type of expensive comforter filled with goose feathers or something) and silence. [The real Eva imagined that the city was full of white telephones and all the money could buy for everyone. Tim Rice is trying to show Eva's naivetee and ignorance of city life.) When she says "your lover" she's referring to herself, since she appears to be singing to Buenos Aires itself throughout the song and a few lines before had just declared her love for the big city. No there's nothing sad about the lyric. Some of you people really need to start using your heads. Take the time to study and dissect a lyric and find its meaning. It's a lot like reading poetry. As for the MISS SAIGON lyrics, since the musical is entirely sung (like an opera) there will naturally be recitative in between the arias, or songs. Thus, when Kim says "That marine wants his beer" she's not singing per se but reciting. Sorry if I sound bitter, but a lot of what's posted in this thread should not be considered the worst lyric ever.

[StageManager2]

Posted: 5/24/06 at 3:38am

trikaraokeidol, in response to your post regarding "Buenos Aires" lyrics: what is sad about them" You forgot to includethe three lines preceding the three you posted.

And if I ever I go too far
It's because of the things you are
Beautiful town I love you
And if I need a moment's rest
Give your lover the very best
Real eiderdown and silence

Eva is talking about how much she'll be taken in by the big city that she'll act literally like a kid in a candy store, trying to experience everything at once and overdoing it. But when she finally rests, the city will provide her with "real eiderdown" (which is a type of expensive comforter filled with goose feathers or something) and silence. [The real Eva imagined that the city was full of white telephones and all the money could buy for everyone. Tim Rice is trying to show Eva's naivetee and ignorance of city life.) When she says "your lover" she's referring to herself, since she appears to be singing to Buenos Aires itself throughout the song and a few lines before had just declared her love for the big city. No there's nothing sad about the lyric. Some of you people really need to start using your heads. Take the time to study and dissect a lyric and find its meaning. It's a lot like reading poetry. As for the MISS SAIGON lyrics, since the musical is entirely sung (like an opera) there will naturally be recitative in between the arias, or songs. Thus, when Kim says "That marine wants his beer" she's not singing per se but reciting. Sorry if I sound bitter, but a lot of what's posted in this thread should not be considered the worst lyric ever.

[beav]

Posted: 5/24/06 at 4:11am

In Les Mis, the bit about "If we come out of this alive, I'll see you at number 55 ..." What? What? And then in John And Jen there's "If you have to hit something, hit a home run." Painfully cheesy.

My particularly loathed line from J&H is the "Today, or never, I'll sit forever with the gods".

[bschneid76]

Posted: 5/24/06 at 8:10am

This might have been said already but from JENNIE:

"Don't want the pie that's in the sky. I want the pie before i die!"

[scooter38432]

Posted: 5/24/06 at 8:14am

StageManager2...

Point taken regarding the MISS SAIGON "That marine wants his beer" issue.

However, it's still a lyric.

AND, it's still lousy writing.

[WhenURScrap]

Posted: 5/24/06 at 3:55pm

"HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!" from Different in HONK

[StageManager2]

Posted: 5/24/06 at 4:13pm

scooter38432, I wonder if in regard to "that marine wants his beer" your assume that Kim is just saying it for the hell of it. If you've only listened to it on the sound recording, then yeah it seems odd. But in the presentation, the engineer has pulled Kim aside and talking with her about Chris when a non-descript marine asks for another beer. Remember, Kim works as a bar girl and her other job is to serve beer to the soldiers. Therefore, when the marine interrupts, Kim tells the engineer "that marine wants his beer" and proceeds to get one for him.

As for you, Ruby Slippers, Valjean is telling Javert that after the battle, if he is still and alive and Javert still wants to apprehend him, he can find him at 45 Rue Plumet, which is the address of his house. Basically, Valjean is telling Javert "You know where I live." God, you people are so dense sometimes!