The Most Brilliant Monologue in Film History

[Cruel_Sandwich]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 3:10pm

"Good morning. In less than an hour, aircraft from here will join others from around the world. And you will be launching the largest aerial battle in the history of mankind. "Mankind." That word should have new meaning for all of us today. We can't be consumed by our petty differences anymore. We will be united in our common interests. Perhaps it's fate that today is the Fourth of July, and you will once again be fighting for our freedom... Not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution... but from annihilation. We are fighting for our right to live. To exist. And should we win the day, the Fourth of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day the world declared in one voice: "We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight!" We're going to live on! We're going to survive! Today we celebrate our Independence Day!"

*tear*

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 3:21pm

Are you effing kidding me?

I would submit Samuel Jackson's from Pulp Fiction.

[GuyfromGermany]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 3:34pm

Lester Burnham from "American Beauty":
"I had always heard your entire life flashes in front of your eyes the second before you die. First of all, that one second isn't a second at all, it stretches on forever, like an ocean of time... For me, it was lying on my back at Boy Scout camp, watching falling stars... And yellow leaves, from the maple trees, that lined my street... Or my grandmother's hands, and the way her skin seemed like paper... And the first time I saw my cousin Tony's brand new Firebird... And Janie... And Janie... And... Carolyn. I guess I could be pretty pissed off about what happened to me... but it's hard to stay mad, when there's so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much, my heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst... And then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain and I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life... You have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm sure. But don't worry... you will someday."

Maybe not the most brilliant, but it's so touching...

[ShbrtAlley44]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 4:05pm

Hooper: You were on the Indianapolis?
Brody: What happened?
Quint: Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes into her side, Chief. Was comin' back from the island of Tinian Leyte. Just delivered the bomb, the Hiroshima bomb. Eleven hundred men went into the water. Vessel went down in twelve minutes. Didn't see the first shark for about half an hour. Tiger, thirteen-footer. You know how you know that when you're in the water, Chief? You tell by lookin' from the dorsal to the tail. What we didn't know was our bomb mission had been so secret no distress signal had been sent. They didn't even list us overdue for a week. Very first light, Chief, sharks come cruisin'. So we formed ourselves into tight groups. It was kinda like old squares in a battle, like you see on a calendar, like the Battle of Waterloo. And the idea was, the shark comes to the nearest man, and that man, he starts poundin' and hollerin' and screamin'. Sometimes the shark go away, sometimes he wouldn't go away. Sometimes, that shark, he looks right into ya, right into your eyes. You know, the thing about a shark, he's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes, like a doll's eyes. When he comes at ya, he doesn't seem to be livin', until he bites ya and those black eyes roll over white. And then, ah, then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin'. The ocean turns red. And in spite of all the poundin' and hollerin', they all come in, they rip you to pieces. You know, by the end of that first dawn, lost a hundred men. I don't know how many sharks, maybe a thousand. I don't know how many men. They averaged six an hour. On Thursday morning, Chief, I bumped into a friend of mine. That'd be Robinson, from Cleveland, baseball player, boatswain's mate. I thought he was asleep. Reached over to wake him up. Bobbed up and down in the water just like a kind of top. Upended. Well, he'd been bitten in half below the waist. Noon the fifth day, Mr. Hooper, a Lockheed Ventura saw us. He swung in low and saw us. A young pilot, a lot younger than Mr. Hooper. Anyway, he saw us and come in low, and three hours later, a big fat PBY comes down and starts to pick us up. You know, that was the time I was most frightened, waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a lifejacket again. So, eleven hundred men went in the water. Three hundred and sixteen men come out. The sharks took the rest. June the 29th, 1945. Anyway, we delivered the bomb.

-Robert Shaw as Quint in "Jaws"

Updated On: 7/9/06 at 04:05 PM

Posted: 7/9/06 at 4:36pm

I would nominated Barbara Jean's breakdown from robert altman's NASHVILLE

[DG]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 4:48pm

Miss Coco Peru, from TRICK:
"A little pee-shy? Don't worry, Miss Coco is here to help. Gabriel, you look like a nice person, you do. So, as a truth seeker, i feel it's my duty to tell you that Mark is a no-good ****in' piece of rat ****. Don't get me wrong, he's handsome, he's charming, huge penis. HUGE penis. Oh believe me Gabriel, I know. I know. I remember the first time i met him. Oh yeah, it was two years ago, gay pride day, I was on the train going home from the festivities, and he was sitting across from me sleeping. But he wasn't really sleeping.. Oh no. He was pretending to sleep because he knows he looks like an angel when he's sleeping and not the anti-christ he really is. And even though i could tell he was fakin', i went along with it. Call me crazy, i dont know. Anyway, we started talking and he gives me some line about some old lady he lives with and he asked if he could go back to my place. I told him, "I don't invite strangers to my apartment". And then he looks down at his crotch and then back up at me, and he says "It's big, it's beautiful and you're gonna love it." I said "Oh, alright", and as he walked me back to my apartment on that gay night of nights, he took my hand gently into his, and for a moment I felt like the luckiest drag queen in the world, and I fantasized: yeah, this is it.
This is the man i'm gonna spend the rest of my life with. I'd be the one to show him the virtues of a loving heart. But do you know what he did? He took that heart, he tossed it on the floor and with his little satan hooves he jumped. He jumped hard. The truth is gabriel when we got back to my apartment he grabbed me and threw me on the bed, he tore off all my clothes. *knocking on the restroom door* WILL YOU HOLD ON ONE GODDAMN MINUTE?! Jesus Christ, now i forgot where I was. Oh right, so I'm lickin his balls and the next thing I know, he cums in my eye and he's out the door. Gone. You ever get cum in your eye Gabriel, HMM? It BURNS. So, there I was, laying in the middle of my bed completely naked with an eye full of cum, thinkin' to myself "oh hell no." And then the next day when I call the number he'd given me earlier it was the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens and would you believe they never even heard of a Mark Miranda? Am I bitter? Absolutely. Face it, you're just another phone number on a dirty cocktail napkin shoved into the bottom of his pocket. *Gabriel finally begins to urinate*. Good boy. Well, do what you will. I only offer you this information because i'm a giver. Who knows, maybe some day we'll meet again, and i'll be able to look at you and say, "Gabriel, Gabriel, I told you so."

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 4:52pm

I did enjoy that monologue, DG.

VERY nice choice, ShbrtAlley44.

[Cruel_Sandwich]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 5:14pm

"Allow me to be frank at the commencement. You will not like me. The gentlemen will be envious and the ladies will be repelled. You will not like me now and you will like me a good deal less as we go on. Ladies, an announcement: I am up for it, all the time. That is not a boast or an opinion, it is bone hard medical fact. I put it round you know. And you will watch me putting it round and sigh for it. Don't. It is a deal of trouble for you and you are better off watching and drawing your conclusions from a distance than you would be if I got my tarse up your petticoats. Gentlemen. Do not despair, I am up for that as well. And the same warning applies. Still your cheesy erections till I have had my say. But later when you shag - and later you will shag, I shall expect it of you and I will know if you have let me down - I wish you to shag with my homuncular image rattling in your gonads. Feel how it was for me, how it is for me and ponder. 'Was that shudder the same shudder he sensed? Did he know something more profound? Or is there some wall of wretchedness that we all batter with our heads at that shining, livelong moment. That is it. That is my prologue, nothing in rhyme, no protestations of modesty, you were not expecting that I hope. I am John Wilmot, Second Earl of Rochester and I do not want you to like me."

- THE LIBERTINE

[papalovesmambo]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 6:09pm

son, we live in a world that has walls, and those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. whose gonna do it? you? you, lt. weinburg? i have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. you weep for santiago, and you curse the marines. you have that luxury. you have the luxury of not knowing what i know. that santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives. and my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. you don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. we use words like honor, code, loyalty. we use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. you use them as a punchline. i have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that i provide, and then questions the manner in which i provide it. i would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, otherwise, i suggest you pick up a weapon, and stand a post. either way, i don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.

colonel nathan r. jessep, a few good men

[Cruel_Sandwich]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 6:12pm

This wasn't actually in the movie but it's funny nonetheless.

"Ahhh! I don't get it. I don't get it. I don't get it. How could I find myself in this mess? This is a mess. This is not a situation I understand. This is a mess. How do I extricate myself from this mess? Is my girlfriend a man? I don't understand. This is not a part of any plan. She deceived me. She has hair! She's not supposed to have it! But am I being fair? So what if she has hair? Who am I to judge? I have hair. But I'm supposed to have it! I am a man. Men are supposed to have hair. But poor Lila. Think of what she's had to go through. The courage she's had to have in the face of this abomination of nature. I should love her all the more. I should love every grotesque hair on her body."

- HUMAN NATURE

[Bret]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 6:27pm

No... wire... hangers. What's wire hangers doing in this closet when I told you: no wire hangers EVER? I work and work 'till I'm half-dead, and I hear people saying, "She's getting old." And what do I get? A daughter... who cares as much about the beautiful dresses I give her... as she cares about me. What's wire hangers doing in this closet? Answer me. I buy you beautiful dresses, and you treat them like they were some dishrag. You do. Three hundred dollar dress on a wire hanger. We'll see how many you've got if they're hidden somewhere. We'll see... we'll see. Get out of that bed. All of this is coming out. Out. Out. Out. Out. Out. Out. You've got any more? We're gonna see how many wire hangers you've got in your closet. Wire hangers, why? Why? Christina, get out of that bed. Get out of that bed. You live in the most beautiful house in Brentwood and you don't care if your clothes are stretched out from wire hangers. And your room looks like some two-dollar-a-week furnished room in some two-bit back street town in Okalahoma. Get up. Get up. Clean up this mess.


Lest I even say where from?

[shiksa_goddess]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 6:38pm

Tom Joad's final monologue in "The Grapes of Wrath." Brilliant.

[pab]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 6:39pm

"It wasn't him, Charley! It was you. You remember that night in the Garden, you came down to my dressing room and said: 'Kid, this ain't your night. We're going for the price on Wilson.' You remember that? 'This ain't your night!' My night! I coulda taken Wilson apart! So what happens? He gets the title shot outdoors in the ball park - and whadda I get? A one-way ticket to Palookaville....You was my brother, Charley. You shoulda looked out for me a little bit. You shoulda taken care of me - just a little bit - so I wouldn't have to take them dives for the short-end money....You don't understand! I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender. I coulda been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am. Let's face it ...... It was you, Charley."

[Mr Roxy]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 6:39pm

Since Grapes Of Wrath is taken, I will say Jimmy Stewart in Mr Smith Goes To Washington

[blueroses]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 6:40pm

Bret wins.

[Craig]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 6:42pm

Love this one:

I love you. And not in a friendly
way, although I think we?re great
friends. And not in a misplaced
affection, puppy-dog way, although I?m
sure that?s what you?ll call it. And
it?s not because you?re unattainable.
I love you. Very simple, very truly.
You?re the epitome of every attribute
and quality I?ve ever looked for in
another person. I know you think of
me as just a friend and crossing that
line is the furthest thing from an
option you?d ever consider. But I
can?t do this any longer. I can?t
stand next to you without wanting to
hold you. I can?t look into your eyes
without feeling that longing you only
read about in trashy romance novels.
I can?t talk to you without wanting to
express my love for everything you
are. I know this will probably queer
our friendship - no pun intended - but
I had to say it, because I?ve never
felt this before, and I like who I am
because of it. And if bringing it to
light means we can?t hang out anymore,
then that hurts me. But I couldn?t
allow another day to go by without
getting it out there, regardless of
the outcome, which by the look on your
face is to be the inevitable shoot-
down. And I?ll accept that But I know
some part of you is hesitating for a
moment, and if there is a moment of
hesitation, that means you feel
something too. All I ask is that you
not suppress that - at least for ten
minutes - and try to dwell in it
before you dismiss it.
There isn?t another soul on this
****ing planet who?s ever made me the
person I am when I?m with you, and I
would risk this friendship for the
chance to take it to the next plateau.
Because it?s there between you and me.
You can?t deny that. And even if we
never speak again after tonight,
please know that I?m forever changed
because of you and what you?ve meant
to me, which - while I do appreciate
it - I?d never need a painting of
birds bought at a diner to remind me
of.



..chasing amy

Updated On: 7/9/06 at 06:42 PM

[cturtle]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 6:50pm

as god is my witness, as god is my witness, they're not going to lick me! i'm going to live through this, and when it's all over, i'll never be hungry again. no! nor any of my folk! if i have to lie, steal, cheat, or kill, as god is my witness, i'll never be hungry again!

[blueroses]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 6:52pm

Oh God. I love that part in Chasing Amy.

[Mr Roxy]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 6:54pm

Brando in On The Waterfront

[SallyBrown]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 6:55pm

I still am in awe, after mannny times seeing To Kill A Mockingbird, during the speech at the courthouse. Maybe not the best, but it still hits me every time.

[blueroses]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 7:19pm

"We must not confuse dissent from disloyalty. We must remember always, that accusation is not proof, and that conviction depends upon evidence and due process of law. We will not walk in fear, one of another, we will not be driven by fear into an age of unreason. If we dig deep into our history and our doctrine, we will remember we are not descended from fearful men. Not from men who dared to write, to speak, to associate, and to defend causes that were for the moment unpopular...The actions of the Junior Senator from Wisconsin have caused alarm and dismay amongst our allies abroad and given considerable comfort to our enemies. And who's fault is that? Not really his. He didn't create this situation of fear -- he merely exploited it, and rather successfully. Cassius was right: the fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, but in ourselves. Good night, and good luck."

[Gothampc]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 7:38pm

Judy Garland "A Star is Born". One camera shot. Raw emotion, no tricks. None better.

[Cruel_Sandwich]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 7:43pm

"For years, humanity has turned its eyes skyward. The sky has been our cropfield AWAY from our cropfields! We have looked to it...expectin' en'less harvest. And we have recieved nothing less than an incredible bounty each time we struck our collective icepicks into its heart. But now....our wonderful comrade-in-arms has become a miserable BEAST-WITH-FANGS! As the levelin', in which 100% sky meets 100% ground, is beginnin'! Atlas is growin' weary and humanity is growin' more blind!"

- ATLAS DYING, the best film ever made.

Posted: 7/9/06 at 9:47pm

also Piper Laurie in CARRIE

[blueroses]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 9:52pm

Love this:

"If I asked you about art, you'd probably give me the skinny on every art book ever written. Michelangelo, you know a lot about him. Life's work, political aspirations, him and the pope, sexual orientations, the whole works, right? But I'll bet you can't tell me what it smells like in the Sistine Chapel. You've never actually stood there and looked up at that beautiful ceiling; seen that. If I ask you about women, you'd probably give me a syllabus about your personal favorites. You may have even been laid a few times. But you can't tell me what it feels like to wake up next to a woman and feel truly happy. You're a tough kid. And I'd ask you about war, you'd probably throw Shakespeare at me, right, "once more unto the breach dear friends." But you've never been near one. You've never held your best friend's head in your lap, watch him gasp his last breath looking to you for help. I'd ask you about love, you'd probably quote me a sonnet. But you've never looked at a woman and been totally vulnerable. Known someone that could level you with her eyes, feeling like God put an angel on earth just for you. Who could rescue you from the depths of hell. And you wouldn't know what it's like to be her angel, to have that love for her, be there forever, through anything, through cancer. And you wouldn't know about sleeping sitting up in the hospital room for two months, holding her hand, because the doctors could see in your eyes, that the terms "visiting hours" don't apply to you. You don't know about real loss, 'cause it only occurs when you've loved something more than you love yourself. And I doubt you've ever dared to love anybody that much. And look at you... I don't see an intelligent, confident man... I see a cocky, scared ****less kid. But you're a genius Will. No one denies that. No one could possibly understand the depths of you. But you presume to know everything about me because you saw a painting of mine, and you ripped my ****ing life apart. You're an orphan right? You think I know the first thing about how hard your life has been, how you feel, who you are, because I read Oliver Twist? Does that encapsulate you? Personally... I don't give a sh-t about all that, because you know what, I can't learn anything from you, I can't read in some f-ckin' book. Unless you want to talk about you, who you are. Then I'm fascinated. I'm in. But you don't want to do that, do you sport? You're terrified of what you might say. Your move, chief."