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Broadway for Dummies

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#1

Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:32pm

I just saw this in another thread, and thought it deserved it's own post. What chapters would be in the book Broadway for Dummies?

Here are some ideas (not all mine!):

Chapter 1: Turning Your Cellphone Off...

Chapter 2-shutting your mouth

chapter 3: Don't unwrap you candy in the theater

chapter 4: Don't BRING candy into the theater

chapter 5: cast recordings, NOT soundtracks

chapter 6-broadwayworld.com

chapter 7: Hot Broadway Actors!

Chapter 8: Ways to get rid of the emotional sadness straight women everywhere feel when they find out the hottest actors are gay.

chapter 9: STRAIGHT broadway actors

chapter 10: what to do when little old ladys talk through the entire show.

chapter 11-good broadway websites

Chapter 12: What to Bring With You to the Theater to Tame the Annoying People (mine)

Anything else?

"We like to snark around here. Sometimes we actually talk about theater...but we try not to let that get in our way." - dramamama611

Updated On: 8/12/04 at 08:32 PM

#2

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:34pm

chapter 13-adam pascal (he deserves his own chapter)

"People asking questions, lost in confusion. Well I tell them there's no problems, only solutions." ~The one and only John Lennon

#3

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:36pm

Aisles aren't there to stand in during intermission...people would like to get to their seats. That's what a lobby is for.

"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. Ralph Waldo Emerson

#4

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:38pm

Chapter 15: Don't Hum, Don't Sing, Don't Tap Your Feet - That's What the Actors Are There For

"We like to snark around here. Sometimes we actually talk about theater...but we try not to let that get in our way." - dramamama611

#5

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:38pm

You forgot the essential chapter on why you should go to the bathroom before the show and try not to go at intermission.

And hang on, when did you win the discus?

#6

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:39pm

a chapter for Bernadette Peters?

#7

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:40pm

a chapter for the Fosters

"We like to snark around here. Sometimes we actually talk about theater...but we try not to let that get in our way." - dramamama611

#8

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:42pm

Chapter 16: What To Do About Musical Fans Who Believe The History of Broadway Started With CATS, or Even Worse Yet, RENT.

#9

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:42pm

how about a chapter for broadway legends

"People asking questions, lost in confusion. Well I tell them there's no problems, only solutions." ~The one and only John Lennon

#10

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:44pm

a chapter for the flops.

"We like to snark around here. Sometimes we actually talk about theater...but we try not to let that get in our way." - dramamama611

#11

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:44pm

Chapter 17: Ensemble and Understudies are actors, too!

Plince! Plince! Nein! T-Rex!!

#12

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:45pm

broadway for dummies:Part 2 will be for the actors/actresses
chapter 16: don't hum/sing the music while in the theater.

You aren't feeling overwhelmed are you?

#13

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:45pm

Chapter 18: So are Standbys and Alternates!

"We like to snark around here. Sometimes we actually talk about theater...but we try not to let that get in our way." - dramamama611

#14

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:45pm

chapter 18 the express elevator to the marquis theater is a terrifying experience (especially if it starts to go up to the 46th floor and then drops down rapidly)

"Grease," the fourth revival of the season, is the worst show in the history of theater and represents an unparalleled assault on Western civilization and its values. - Michael Reidel

Updated On: 8/12/04 at 08:45 PM

#15

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:46pm

this is going to be a HUGE book

You aren't feeling overwhelmed are you?

#16

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:49pm

I think the chapters on specific people should be put in a different book of Broadway STARS for Dummies

And hang on, when did you win the discus?

#17

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:50pm

Don't forget "Dressing" for the theatre...what you should wear and what you shouldn't wear.

"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. Ralph Waldo Emerson

#18

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:54pm

I think it's up to chapter 20 now

You aren't feeling overwhelmed are you?

#19

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 8:59pm

Chapter 21: How to succeed at the stage door- a lesson in Broadway Moshpits.

What is Broadway? A street? Some say it's a street. Some say it is the best street in the world. Others think its terrible. That's the beauty of it, it's terribly beautiful. Some hate it and don't know why. Others love it and don't know why. That's what makes it so wonderful, it's a mystery.

#20

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 9:05pm

A chapter for Broadway shows exist beyond what was created in the 80's and 90's.

#21

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 9:06pm

Ch. 22- "How To Tell The Difference Between a Real ROCK OPERA (Tommy) and a MUSICAL Disguised as One (Rent)"

Ch. 23- "Huge Broadway Stars You May Recognize From Commercials or Their Two Lines In That Movie"

"The last train out of any station will not be full of nice guys." - Dr. Hunter S. Thompson

"I wash my face, then drink beer, then I weep. Say a prayer and induce insincere self-abuse, till I'm fast asleep"- In Trousers

#22

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 9:06pm

haha i love chapter 21! can we put eden is the standy-by chapter?

"People asking questions, lost in confusion. Well I tell them there's no problems, only solutions." ~The one and only John Lennon

#23

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 9:07pm

Chapter 24: When You Give a Standing Ovation, Make Sure Everyone Else is Actually Standing Up So You Don't Block Someone Else's View

"We like to snark around here. Sometimes we actually talk about theater...but we try not to let that get in our way." - dramamama611

#24

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 9:11pm

>>Ch. 23- "Huge Broadway Stars You May Recognize From Commercials or Their Two Lines In That Movie"
that can go in Broadway Stars for Dummies

You aren't feeling overwhelmed are you?

#25

re: Broadway for Dummies

Posted: 8/12/04 at 9:11pm

ooops. i did that once. but little shop deserved it!

"People asking questions, lost in confusion. Well I tell them there's no problems, only solutions." ~The one and only John Lennon

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