The Thread For Those Who Feel The Need To Share All of Their Banal Details- Page 123

Posted: 4/29/06 at 1:46pm

My parents wanted the graduation party more than I did. This sounds incredibly whiny, but I loathe this town more with each passing day. I hate the prevailing athletic-dominant mentality here, I hate having to give speeches to WASP-y clubs, and more than anything, I hate how I've been growing apart from my friends for a year and I don't even care much.

Sorry, it's just been a bad day. The stress of schoolwork and AP tests isn't helping. I'm sorry to hear that your sweet 16 wasn't fun. I didn't have one.

Em, I liked the teacup ride a lot. I also really liked Epcot and MGM Studios.

[luvtheEmcee]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 1:50pm

I used to like the Teacups, but a few years ago, when I had vertigo, I developed this huge phobia of anything that could potentially make you dizzy, or anything that spins; sometimes things can trigger it to temporarily come back, too. So I can't go on the Teacups anymore. Epcot is my favorite!

I didn't really want to have a party for my 16th, but my parents really wanted me to have one, for some reason. I went to a few and they were fun, so then I decided maybe I *did* want to have one. It was so, so much fun in the moment, but after people who were there (and very important to me) that night started falling out of my life and things went bad in a lot of relationships over the next two years, so much of that fun is now tainted; I look back on it kind of sadly.

*hugs* I understand how you feel. I'm sorry, though. It's not easy.

Banal: it's incredibly stuffy in my room.

Posted: 4/29/06 at 1:57pm

That's how I look back on the summer before ninth grade. It was the last time everything was really "right" between a lot of my friends and I. Parts of last year were good, too, but I don't feel any connection to most of my friends anymore. We're on very different paths now.

I should probably get ready to volunteer. It's my weekly obligation.

[Caroline-Q-or-TBoo]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 2:02pm

my parents think i'm a pothead and a "fag" (as they put it)

[luvtheEmcee]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 2:12pm

It's 2 p.m. and I'm still in bed.

[insomniak]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 2:48pm

Judging by the amount of response I've recieved, I'd venture a guess that my posts are no longer welcome (unless someone wants to oogle my pretty avatar), but I can't find it in me to care.

My feelings regarding old friends and small towns:

Every person in your life is temporary. They're going to die, forget you or make you want to forget them. You enjoy their company for a year or so; then it's over. I've only known one person who really cared about me unconditionally and non-judgementally, and I don't expect to find many more. The easiest way to avoid those regretful feelings about sixteenth birthdays and "tru teen luv" are to realize that they're very superficial. There's no long-term benefit in investing a lot of love into someone, but you can still laugh at their jokes and chit chat for the sake of fun.

Small towns are only good for their antique shops and ice cream places. Friends are only good for their antique memories and ice cold rejections.




Updated On: 4/29/06 at 02:48 PM

[orangeskittles]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 2:55pm

Hmm, that's interesting, I thought I saw another post after Em's, but I must have just been imagining it. I guess I won't respond.

Updated On: 4/29/06 at 02:55 PM

[insomniak]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 2:58pm

But you just did.
Updated On: 4/29/06 at 02:58 PM

[xM3L24x]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 3:02pm

"so much of that fun is now tainted; I look back on it kind of sadly."
That's how I always feel when looking back on pictures with people who I'm no longer friends with or don't like anymore. It makes me sad.

Nia-- I agree with you. I know that a lot of the friendships I have with people right now are not going to last past highschool. There's only really one or two friends that I have that I'd want to still know years from now.

[insomniak]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 3:06pm

Exactly, M3. Right now I have a handful of people I can talk to, but we're not close and I know we never will be. Nevertheless, I can still eat lunch with them, even though I know we won't speak after graduation.

And that's really ok. It's just not an easy to deal with sometimes, if you expect more than you get (which I used to do).

[caitiesus1522]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 3:06pm

But then you have the friends that you will sit around on a Friday night and color things like this




and talk about all the stuff that is great about your friendship

[xM3L24x]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 3:14pm

Yeah, I always expect too much from people in general. My friends tell me I'm "too nice".

Wow, that's really pretty Caitie .

[wickedrentq]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 3:21pm

"You'll never share real love until you love yourself."

One of my favorite quotes. It holds true in the context, but it applies to all walks of life--romantic love, as well as the love of friends. I wrote well what accidentally ended up being a 23-page paper(oops) on rejection sensitivity. It's a cycle. If you go through life either desperately feeling or assuming that you will be rejected by others, you do get rejected/abandoned. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy.

And I would know, as I fell into that trap for years. Between third grade and tenth grade, the same pattern would happen. I would become best friends with a sort of queen bee...or maybe they weren't a queen bee yet, but they would become one and totally ditch me/make me feel like ****. I always blamed myself because it must have been me...everyone didn't want to be my friend after a while. Until the end of 10th grade I finally realized it was me to an extent. I was a rag mop. I let people get away with treating me like ****, but still considered them my "friend." Who wouldn't wanna take stuff out on someone who will let you? I feared rejection so much that I let them get away with it, and doing that is what got me rejected.

What's funny is all through this, I didn't realize what I had. I still have two best friends...one I've been friends with since I was 6 years old, one 3. We're still extremely close, and one of my friends and I have just gone through 2 really rough things together, and we're as close as ever.

I mean, with trusting people there comes a lot of hurt. One day I got so mad at someone I thought was my friend I told a friend I wasn't gonna trust anyone anymore. She was like c'mon...it's not something you can change. And despite getting very hurt at times, I'm glad I'm like that. The good ends up outweighing the bad. I made 4 life-long friends after just...living/being with them for 6 weeks. High school friends who I was worry would neglect me, since I was the one who always called in High School and stuff, proved me wrong.

Still, depending on the situation, past relationships don't always need to be "tainted." If you look back and realize the person was a bitch even as your friend, then yes, it's tainted. If people changed or you just grew apart, you shouldn't have to look back at memories in sadness. Everyone...affects you in some way, and you learn something from everyone. As you lose old close friends, you gain new ones. Even friends who I look back and realize there was a lot I didn't like about them, I can still realize for the time they were a true friend and I'm grateful for that friendship.

Leaving high school is a tough time. I left mostly happy, realizing anyone I would miss I would keep in touch with, though I had the fear that I was proven wrong about them keeping in touch with me. And you may realize there's no one you'll miss, and that's fine too. Your town is such a small sampling of the entire population. You make friends to get you through that time, and once you go off to college and other wakes of life, you could meet people that will impact your life more. I guess it's also hard realizing you won't miss anyone.

Finally, it's important to be able to sustan long-distance relationships. A lot of friends I talk to see, maybe twice a year. But that doesn't mean I'm still not close with them. I know they're there and care about me, and sometimes it's frustrating and I think gah, I haven't talked to her in soo long, are we still even friends? The answer is yes.

Wow, it's been so much fun writing this instead or writing my paper. And my paper isn't really that far off from topic, it's about female aggression in Junior High. But I still don't wanna write it. Stupid procrastination.

Updated On: 4/29/06 at 03:21 PM

[insomniak]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 3:22pm

As skittles enjoyed pointing out, "too nice" is far from being my problem.

I just expect that the people who voluntarily talk to me on a daily basis will, at some point, want to voluntarily do something social with me like seeing a movie. That is apparently too much to ask for.

Nice chatting, M3. I'm off to go study for AP Composition. Bleh.

Caitie, I'm glad you've got friends.

[xM3L24x]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 4:00pm

I'm happy in highschool right now. My friends are what make me happy. I try and not over think friendships. Things change, it's inevitable. You gotta just roll with it .

[dancingthrulife04]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 4:19pm

Banality: I'm half way towards my WalkAmerica goal!

Posted: 4/29/06 at 4:22pm

Nia, I feel that way about nearly everyone I encounter on a day-to-day basis, but I also believe there are a few execeptions to the rule as well. Sure, most people you encounter don't truly care about you and vice-versa, but I think a person comes along to defy that standard once in a while.

My cramps are causing me so much pain that I'm sitting here, blowing my hairdryer on my abdomen.

[luvtheEmcee]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 4:24pm

You should take something....

[xM3L24x]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 4:24pm

That's great dancing!

SD, does that help it? Well I guess it must if you do it. I get bad cramps too and I'm always looking for ways to get rid of it. Feel better though .

[dancingthrulife04]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 4:27pm

Thanks Mel! It's good, especially considering I just registered this morning and it's tomorrow.)



Feel better, SD.

Posted: 4/29/06 at 4:27pm

Thanks, girls. I took two Advil about an hour ago. Mel, pretty much anything with heat helps a bit. It would probably be more energy efficent to just get a hot water bottle, though.

[orangeskittles]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 4:29pm

My cramps get really bad when I go home. I usually end up lying in the tub with the shower on. I don't really get them when I'm at school though- at least not to the point that a dose of ibprofen won't help.

It's gorgeous outside today, but I can't go outside and enjoy it. I need to get work done, but I can't do that without my laptop and we have a really sh*tty wireless connection in my area.

[luvtheEmcee]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 4:29pm

Or a heating pad. :)

[Dirty Rotten Scoundrel]

Posted: 4/29/06 at 4:30pm

Tylenol seems to be disagreeing with me today. Maybe I should switch to Advil?

Posted: 4/29/06 at 4:32pm

Being physically fit is also supposed to help prevent cramps. I keep trying to make a point to exercise, but never do (hah, like 90% of America). I'm trying to promise myself that I'll use the exercise facilities at NYU.