Why Do Some Gay Men Want to Out Other Gay Men?- Page 7

[Rathnait62]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 3:43pm

That's too advanced for nomdeplume. She hasn't yet accepted that we're not pets or aliens.

[papalovesmambo]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 3:47pm

colleen, if you come out, i'm turning to islam. you have to love the c*ck.

[chicolini]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 3:49pm

PJ, I'm sure it's an invaluable book, but the title makes me think it's a show on the DIY network.

"Coming up next: Bob Villa's Outing Yourself, followed by a new episode of Scrapbooking"

[SueleenGay]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 3:52pm

Thanks Robbie. Priest, of course I was not talking about teens who are just discovering their identity and coming to terms with it. Of course coming out is a process, no one here will dispute that.
But there are times when I believe certain closeted people should be outed and other times people might be outed because I refuse to hide who I am. It is unfortunate, perhaps, but I will not play it straight to make you feel more comfortable around people you are not out to yet.

[PalJoey]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 3:53pm

Great idea for a reality show, like Queer Eye: QUEER LIFE FOR THE FORMERLY STRAIGHT GUY

Each week another gay man outs himself to his family, his friends and his co-workers--with hilarious and heartrending results!

[chicolini]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 3:56pm

You could probably get Bob Villa to sign on, too. He doesn't seem to be doing much now that Norm Abrams has taken over as the token celebrity Yankee woodworker, other than repackaging the old 'This Old House' shows for commercial TV.

[SueleenGay]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 4:02pm

Speaking of coming out...Bob Villa?

[doodlenyc]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 4:03pm

Bob Vila and Norm are gay?

How about Tim Allen and that beary guy?

[sally1112]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 7:06pm

Why not out others?

It's cheap, easy, and fun.

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 10:17pm

Sueleen, I said onstage, not on TV.

Rath, it was more complicated than that in my discussion with my hairdresser, who was technically the owner. It also involved decision-making and other dimensional aspects of the relationship he had with his partner. Now in my extended family, the sexes of the spouses did to some extent inform who played which role and had responsibility for which decisions, etc. of the house, partnership and family (not exactly delineated the same way for my own parents as my mother worked, and so on). In a gay partnership, I told him I wouldn't know who played which role because they were both the same sex so I didn't know if they would each take a different role or work the roles some other way. What he basically said was forget about that part of their relationship and look at just the love aspect of his relationship with the other guy, that that was the part he was only concerned about so I could answer that for him.

Actually, I forget who suggested this above, but I don't have any issues with Sueleen and haven't for a long time. I think you, Sueleen, are talented in the graphic arts and while pithy, satirical and sarcastic can also be funny in an over the top way and I haven't felt any real animosity directed toward me from you, though you can disagree all you like with anything I say, so what.

And PalJoey, I do not hate either you or Namo, though I have countered one aspect in particular of both of your behavior and you know well what that is and it deserves to be addressed and eliminated. There is no benefit to be gained from hating; it is a waste of time and energy. One has to focus one's aggressive drive on constructive pursuits that take up your life's energy, to meet life's responsibilites and to create things.

And why would I hate someone just for being gay? Two of the three men to whom I feel most indebted for helping me to grow in theatre are gay and one is like a second father to me. It is his artistry, graciousness and generosity of spirit that I love, his kindness, his unending support and his intelligence. It is, the content of his character. He loves me like my father did, and has passed on to me some skills of his learning that my own father did not possess.

One last comment for now and that is regarding the Christian religion, that some have mentioned is associated with non-acceptance of gays. There are different groups of Christians and different interpretations of Christianity. Yes, some groups or sects of Christians take such stances against gays and that is the case in some other religions as well, certainly Islam and sharia law can be as extreme as you can get.

In the Episcopal protestant catholic faith we are given an analogy to the understanding of the faith as being like a stool with three legs. All of the legs are required for the stool to stand and none outweighs the other. These are: Church traditions, scripture and individual conscience. Scripture, at least the old testament, may take a stance against homosexuality. Maybe some of the Church's traditions do, too, regarding certain aspects of ordination of ministers, conduct of marriage and so on. But if you in your deep conscience feel that being gay is who you are and is the right thing, no one can say that one of the other "legs" of the stool outweighs your individual conscience. And some of our more esoteric doctrines like the Athanasius creed acknowledge that we cannot see God's plan, in that seemingly parallel lines of belief and thought (that we see as being so different as to never meet) will eventually meet toward infinity as part of God's design. So if you want to be or assert that you are Christian based upon your true conscience no one can knock out the third leg of the stool to say you are not. Therefore I do not see Christianity as excluding someone. The difference may be how you choose to view what Christianity itself is, whether you have felt it or viewed it to be exclusive because of what some people said or did, or whether you choose to embrace it and find a place within it, claim a place within it for yourself. No one has to, but you can.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 11:07pm

"...I do not hate either you or Namo, though I have countered one aspect in particular of both of your behavior and you know well what that is and it deserves to be addressed and eliminated..."

Ha ha ha HA. Who CARES what you have to say nom? I mean, I'd be happy to "eliminate" in front of you, perhaps all over your pointy shoes, maybe show you what a three-legged stool really looks like.

But other than that, you're a phony and a fake and "transgender" is not a verb and the night of your last big meltdown you spent and AWFUL lot of time in an AWFUL lot of threads attempting to "out" again and again. So, you're a hypocrite, too.

[PalJoey]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 11:09pm

Scripture, at least the old testament, may take a stance against homosexuality

That's the most disgustingly homophobic thing you have EVER posted.

How DARE you cherry-pick scripture and choose only the few homophobic edicts to follow? HOW DARE YOU? HOW DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE YOU?

If you choose to throw Leviticus 18:22 in my face, I DEMAND that you yourself ALSO follow:

Ephesians 6:5-9

Timothy 2:9-15

Leviticus 11:7

Leviticus 11:9

and ESPECIALLY

Leviticus 19:19

Look them up, bItch!

But don't you EVER, EVER throw individual biblical injunctions in my OUT PROUD GAY FACE until you can look me in the face and say that you follow EVERY biblical injunction.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 11:13pm

"though I have countered one aspect in particular of both of your behavior ... and it deserves to be addressed and eliminated."

So, nom, I guess it looks as if we've both rejected your little charm school lessons! Ha ha ha HA!

[StickToPriest]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 11:22pm

Okay, nom, I was with you and willing to defend you until you threw in the scripture line and the Old Testament mumbo-jumbo.

I'm climbing over the fence to be with Namo, Sueleen, PalJoey, et al.

Updated On: 4/11/07 at 11:22 PM

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 11:23pm

How odd you both are.

Sorry if what you were wanting was hate because I'm actually feeling just sorry for you that you are both off on such ranting tangents.

[PalJoey]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 11:29pm

nom: Your hatred is all the more insidious because you claim to be free of it. But it oozes out of your demented posts in ways everyone else can see even if you can't.

My wish for you is that God in all Her kindness grant you a little self-sight.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 11:30pm

"I'm actually feeling just sorry for you ..."

Again, completely misguided and wholly inappropriate. Again, funny that you should think anybody gives a damn about what you're "actually feeling."

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 11:39pm

StickToPriest, I see the legs of the stool as a doctrinal argument for the strength of individuals in Christianity, and it covers much more than whether someone is gay or not.

It is supposed to give balance to the Church, and strength by inclusiveness. There is a further consideration that one part of scripture is not supposed to outweigh any other part of scripture, so one cannot be "right" by quoting one part of scripture against another.

Probably half of the men at my parish are openly gay and they are very devoted to the Church, participating in all the duties and events.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 4/11/07 at 11:43pm

Wow, you're veritably ROLLING in the gay people, aren't you? Too bad you're still such a prick(ette)!

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 4/12/07 at 12:00am

When you worship beside so many gay men at Church, and it could be as much as 70 percent of the men at my Church, it's hard to reconcile that with hearing gay guys on here condemn Christianity as anti-gay. It seems like a paradox.

[StickToPriest]

Posted: 4/12/07 at 12:01am

I didn't condemn Christianity as anti-gay. I consider myself Christian. I took offense with you throwing certain Old Testament passages in our faces.

Updated On: 4/12/07 at 12:01 AM

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 4/12/07 at 12:15am

StickToPriest, I did not name or mention one single quote or passage from the Bible. I only said Old Testament and used the word "may" as the New Testament doesn't seem to be included when the issue is raised. Not a word from the Bible was thrown in anyone's face.

[theaterdude87]

Posted: 4/12/07 at 12:39am

ok no offense but isn't Jesus half naked on the cross? that sounds pretty gay to me. i am jewish so... its not my expertise really.

[nomdeplume]

Posted: 4/12/07 at 12:42am

You wouldn't be the first person to raise the question of whether Jesus was gay, kidding or not.

[suzycat]

Posted: 4/12/07 at 12:47am

hmmm... when I read this thread title I thought it said "Why Do Some Gay Men Want to Make Out With Other Gay Men?"

And I thought, well duh.