Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times — Page 8

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#176

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 3:13pm

You're completely twisting my words. That man is dead now, and his family may very well not want personal information about him in the national press. It has nothing to to with shame, but with their own privacy.

Do you really think I'd be posting with sympathy for a family ashamed of their gay relative? Seriously? I don't know if they were or not, but that's certainly not what my "argument" is about. It's about privacy.

Have I ever shown you my Shattered Dreams box? It's in my Disappointment Closet. - Marge Simpson

Updated On: 11/26/06 at 03:13 PM

#177

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 3:14pm

This is an interesting and intelligent discussion...one worthy of its subject.

As a fan of his work, I can only wish Raul the best.

I'd only like to mention in passing, that the interview was conducted by Joyce Wadler, the former N.Y. Times gossip columnist who was fired from that position - (and eventually the somewhat puerile column itself was terminated under her successor - after trying to compete with the lively gossip coverage of Post and the News - particularly the Post's Page Six).

My direct experience with this woman is one of misquotes, rudeness, and frequent inaccurate reporting. Also, I have seen her - shall we say - "provoke" people she was interviewing. Obviously I think VERY little of her.

I'm not saying that she is guilty of this in this particular interview with Esparza...but I wish a more reliable and professional interviewer had been accorded Raul and his important story by the Times.

Godspeed, Raul.

Updated On: 11/26/06 at 03:14 PM

#178

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 3:16pm

A gossip columnist? What the hell? Why would someone with that kind of background be allowed to handle something like this? I think she handled it fine, but... wow.

A work of art is an invitation to love.

#179

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 3:20pm

Raul, I'm so very proud of you for coming out. *huggles 'cause he's so huggable*

Best wishes with Company!

1. Ted Allen: Everyone has an interesting life if you ask the right questions.
2. Great buckets of Spoffnor, they're going to sing!
3. "I love shrubs that are historical." -Johnny and The Sprites
4. "We're not singing it to you, we're singing it for us." -Rosario Dawson, about La Vie Boheme
5. "The best moments in reading are when you come across something - a thought, a feeling, a way of looking at things - which you had thought special and particular to you. And now, here it is, set down by someone else, a person you have never met, someone even who is long dead. And it is as if a hand has come out, and taken yours." -The History Boys
6. "Pass the parcel. That's sometimes all you can do. Take it, feel it and pass it on. Not for me, not for you, but for someone, somewhere, one day. Pass it on, boys. That's the game I want you to learn. Pass it on." -The History Boys

#180

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 3:35pm

But if we don't know the family is demanding privacy, why should you demand it on their behalf without knowing their wishes?

Like a firework unexploded
Wanting life but never knowing how

#181

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 3:40pm

Good for Raul!

#182

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 3:40pm

I feel like we can't assume one way or another what anyone in the article wants or wanted. For all we know Raúl got the okay from everyone mentioned. I'm not saying he definitely did, but it's just as legitimate an assumption.

"We don't value the lily less for not being made of flint and built to last. Life's bounty is in it's flow, later is too late. Where is the song when it's been sung, the dance when it's been danced? It's only we humans who want to own the future too." - Tom Stoppard, Shipwreck

#183

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 3:42pm

Good God. I'm not "demanding" anything. I'm adding to the discussion. Other people have been involved in his coming out, and we don't know how that makes them or their families feel.

It's part of what we're talking about. It's not demanding anything on their behalf - a little late for that, and I don't know them. I'm putting myself in the place of other people who are affected by this article.

Not that they count, apparently.

Have I ever shown you my Shattered Dreams box? It's in my Disappointment Closet. - Marge Simpson

#184

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 3:46pm

Of course they count, but by all logic, putting yourself in their position is clearly the antithesis to putting yourself in Raúl's position.

I think it's a little bit moot, really, to "assume" what their position must be like; for all we know, they may be okay with this. They may not. I don't get what's worth arguing about, honestly, even if you disagree with what Raúl did.

On another note, I don't know how I'm going to keep from crying my freaking eyes out next time I see the show. :/ If there were moments that were painful to watch before, it's going to be even more emotional now.

A work of art is an invitation to love.

#185

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 3:49pm

I was just thinking that Em...I wanted to go back this week anyway, but I feel like maybe I'll give it another week. I'm sure I'll be a wreck like I have both times thusfar.

#186

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 3:51pm

This has nothing to do with the discussion itself, but just something random that's been bothering me whilst reading this thread. People keep saying that they are "proud of" Raul. How can you be proud of him unless you are really close with him? I mean, sure you know of some of the angst he's been through judging by this article, but it's not as if you were there with him comforting him and supporting him with his decision to make this information accessible to the public (which to my knowledge, none of you were). Sure, you can admire him for making the decision and being so brave (which I do, and he is). But being proud of him is a bit much.

#187

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 3:57pm

Um. Accusatory much? I don't really find anything wrong with the distanced sort of pride that it is, if people know that this was difficult for him, and that he's been struggling with this for so long. It's obviously not a claim to know him or be close to him, but I think that... for me, at least, being very, very moved by many pieces in his body of work leads to the fact that I can't help but care at least little in that I want for him to be happy. When someone you care about, however distanced that is, does something brave, isn't feeling proud of them sort of... natural? I'm certainly not going to walk up to him and be like "dude, I'm so proud of you!" There's a difference.

aspiringactress, I only cried that first time, but it still just feels like I've been punched in the gut by the end.

A work of art is an invitation to love.

Updated On: 11/26/06 at 03:57 PM

#188

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 4:01pm

I don't think it's moot at all. Why would the feelings of the people he brought into this be moot? And I agree, we DON'T know if they all threw a parade for him, or if some did and some didn't, and if some perhaps had painful memories brought to the surface. Why isn't it relevant to the discussion? It's a big part of the article.

Have I ever shown you my Shattered Dreams box? It's in my Disappointment Closet. - Marge Simpson

#189

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 4:03pm

Because you speculate, you say what you think, you make your points about agreeing or not, and then... since nobody knows one way or the other, what's to debate? I don't think it's irrelevant at all, just not particularly worth debate once the arguments have been presented.

I'm certainly curious because it's a big bomb to drop, but I doubt much will come to light on that one.

A work of art is an invitation to love.

Updated On: 11/26/06 at 04:03 PM

#190

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 4:05pm

And yet so many of you are debating it, instead of just letting it lie as an added thought when I first mentioned it.

Have I ever shown you my Shattered Dreams box? It's in my Disappointment Closet. - Marge Simpson

#191

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 4:06pm

Well, you brought it up and people disagreed. You say something controversial and it gets refuted -- common sense. You didn't exactly just add it and let it lie, but kept pushing it when people disagreed. So it goes.

A work of art is an invitation to love.

Updated On: 11/26/06 at 04:06 PM

#192

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 4:29pm

No one tried to imply that they were holding hands with him through all this and providing a shoulder to cry on. The word "proud" is not intended to mean that you had a direct impact on the person that you are proud of. One of the definitions of proud is "much pleased". We are much pleased that he is being open and honest about this. We were pleased about his actions as we respect him as an actor and understand what a monumentous move this is for him.

This discussion, however, shouldn't have to dissolve into an analysis of semantics just because you feel the need to be judgemental about how people should be allowed to post about this instead of addressing the ACTUAL news. And you of all people should not be judging others for feigning closeness with an actor, especially since no one here was doing that.

Like a firework unexploded
Wanting life but never knowing how

#193

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 4:40pm

Hey now, I was not trying to attract hostile vibes at all. I was not directing the comment towards one person in particular, and I apologize if it seemed that way. Also, that's just how I see the term "proud." I mean, I just don't go around saying that I'm proud of someone I don't know. That's all. I wasn't trying to offend anybody. And for the record, I was not, in any way, implying that one of you was flaunting a non-existant (or even existant) relationship with Raul.

And also, in reference to the feigning relationships with actors, I have not been running around saying that I'm close with random actors. I hardly even post on love threads anymore. I wasn't accusing anyone of doing this, either.

#194

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 4:48pm

Raul is a fantastic performer, and a brilliant, eloquent person. No matter what his sexuality is, I think we can all agree that he will continue to shine as one of the most gifted Broadway actors of this generation. So kudos to Raul for being so candid in his interview, but, to quote T.R. Knight, "His sexuality shouldn't be the most interesting thing about him".

"Writing should be easy, like a monkey driving a speedboat..." -[title of show] "I'm tired of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're going and meet up with them later." -Mitch Hedberg

#195

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 4:54pm

It felt a little unncessarily personal. But whatever.

Well, it's nice to see that Broadway.com has addressed the matter with its typical insensitivity and lack of tact in treating everything as a big joke. They allow you to post comments, but I think I'll... refrain.

http://www.broadway.com/gen/general.aspx?ci=536203

I am, however, curious to see their Q&A with him tomorrow.

A work of art is an invitation to love.

Updated On: 11/26/06 at 04:54 PM

#196

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 4:57pm

You can't post to blatantly disagree with certain posters' actions (don't say it's not personal, you can scroll through this thread and find exactly which posters used the word "proud" in their reaction), then claim you didn't want to attract "hostile vibes". You brought it on yourself; don't get upset just because we reacted in the manner your post deserved.

Like a firework unexploded
Wanting life but never knowing how

Updated On: 11/26/06 at 04:57 PM

#197

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 5:25pm

sigh

#198

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 5:50pm

The incredibly gifted lesbian writer and activist Sarah Schulman has beautifully articulated why the privacy canard is, at its core, fundamentally homophobic. Not surprised in the least to see that it's our Rath who's invoking it.

Twitter @NamoInExile Instagram none

#199

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 6:12pm

I really don't know why I'm bothering at this point, but I suspect that Sarah Schulman was talking about situations rather different from this one.

I'm in favor of actively outing certain people, especially anyone who is pubicly homophobic while privately engaging in gay sex. And, as I've stated, I couldn't be more in favor of people coming out.

But this particular article raises other issues. And when people bring them up, they get accused of being homophobic or defensive or who know what else.

The professor's family might not be thrilled to have the subject of his suicide revisited and in such a public place.

#200

re: Raul Esparza Interview in Sunday Times

Posted: 11/26/06 at 6:43pm

No, your suspicion would be wrong.

And here's the fundamental question: do people have a right to tell the stories of THEIR OWN lives? Because I believe that we all do. And, subsequently, we get to tell of the people in our own lives.

Twitter @NamoInExile Instagram none

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