I feel very shunned from my friends for loving Broadway.- Page 2

[A Fleur De Toi]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 3:54am

since you obviously love legally blonde - "cheer up chin up and keep a happy attitude! keep it positive!"

None of my friends love theatre as well but they dont go quite so far as to hurl abuse and violence my way, though they sometimes ask me to stfu :P

I'm in no position to empathise with you, but I just wanted to let you know you ought to stay true to yourself, cliche as that sounds. Have the courage to be different!

After all, you are what really matters in defining your own life isnt it?

Big Hugs and Kisses to cheer you up!

[KrissySim]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 4:36am

Well, from what you state I strongly suggest you keep up with the professional help that you have access to for your emotional turns. You seem to have a strong passion for an art and it's very good to feed this interest. Try to find friends and teachers who can help you fuel this interest. This board may be able to help you in some ways with your interest in the art, but for the former - specifically for help in your battle against depression - you need to turn to professionals who have the qualifications to give you the help you need.

You are not alone in this world. I can't even begin to name all the great artists who have had to battle with depression. Ultimately, it's a struggle that you must face alone, but there are those who can assist and guide you. Depression, even severe depression can be successfully treated to many different levels of success. But each case is different and it can sometimes be very complex. This is why you need to seek and accept the help of those who are knowledgeable and qualified in the field to guide you.

[bwaybabe2]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 5:57am

"To be true to yourself can often be a lonely and scary thing. It requires bravery to go 'where angels fear to tread.' The people who throw things at you are afraid of their own emotions and would rather play it safe by being numb and emotionally neutral."
...what a beautiful and powerful statement...I have experienced this myself. Most of my best friends, do not share my passion for the business either;however, they respect my feelings (and luckily, they do like Theater, if not the life).

This is the thing: Learn to love what life is given to you, without trying to think you've been shortchanged. Otherwise, you will become bitter and downtrodden. Though I am not a "professional" counselor, I have given some very good advice to many, who have turned their lives around because of it (and I feel very humble and blessed for this). I think your depression might be because you are staring at things in the eye, without knowing how to stare back at them and put them in their place. Depression comes from not understanding why something happens, and not being able to control what is happening to you. Once you understand something, then you can start to deal with it, and heal. HOW you take things, is a very important factor in how your life turns out...that is why there are so many stories of people beating the odds out there (you are certainly NOT the only one, trust me). Your surroundings are a bit harsher than most of us might have experienced, but hang in there...this, too shall pass.
The other thing: Be wise in WHO you choose for a friend. The best way to do this, is to "surround" yourself with people of like mind, who share your core values;they not necessarily need to agree with you about everything--that would be boring =[-- but they should be people who share those values in life which you deem most important (ie.: if you hold "not cheating" as extremely important to you, then choose those who don't cheat, either;otherwise, you will start to compromise YOUR values, and thus, your own soul. It is always better to be alone, than in bad company, as the saying goes. And who says "you" are not good company for yourself? Learn to like yourself for who you are, and you will ultimately have a friend in yourself, and enjoy your solitude.
Still, strive to be in good terms with others, without compromising your morals or values, and try to share when given the opportunity, this life with others...you are doing that on this board, already :)...have you heard "friends are people who know all about you, and still like you, anyways"...? So true. A true friend, will stick by you, even if you have your strifes, and they realize that, as you entrust them with your feelings, so too, they will be able to entrust you with theirs.
And try not to imagine things..."worrying about tommorrow, will only take power away from today" (I read this, wish "I" had come up with it
Also, I believe, deeply, that obstacles are put in our lives to give us character...sort of like "resistance" training. The more resistance we get, the better we learn to eventually discern what is important, and what should be tossed aside, without letting it destroy us ("don't sweat the small stuff"...).

Well, hope I have made a "dent" here. Continue growing in your love for theater and the arts...at least we artists are not as judgemental as others...and, we love you, too (wish they had hearts we could put in here, just like the smileys).
Take good care :)
Updated On: 6/30/08 at 05:57 AM

[DefyGravity777]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 8:16am

Bundy,
I have no friends that like musical theatre at all. It really doesn't bother me either. I figure it's their loss. I go to the theatre alone and that's actually the happiest time in my life and it's also my therapy. There's nothing like getting lost in a show for almost 3 hrs and not having to deal with life. So ditch the friends, enjoy your music and just be you.

[Kaykohl]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 8:51am

Though you always have the net to fall back on, you will inevitably cross paths with others in 'real life' with whom you can share your love of musicals. I don't know the particulars of your situation but is there a community theater or theater group in your area where you can volunteer your services, if not as a performer, then as an usher, carpenter, painter, etc., anything that will enable you to join a network of like-minded individuals?

-------------

ITA with TheEnchantedHunter. I wasn't able to find friends who loved musicals until I became involved in community theatre. The friends I made when I was involved in community theatre are still my friends today and we still go see shows together.

[dchesnutny]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 10:19am

when i was 12 (turning 13), i wrote to patti lupone, who was then starring in 'evita'. in my letter, i mentioned that few people (including my parents) understood my love of broadway (in fact, they thought it was weird).

patti wrote me the NICEST letter back. in that letter, she gave me some advice that i have held with me to today: that it is MUCH better to go through life with passions, INTERESTED IN SOMETHING, rather than "wandering listlessly" through life like most people.

bundy - it's far better that you have your interest in theatre, which can help you get through the dark times and light times, whether your friends understand it, share it, or not. today i have a few friends who share my interest in theatre, and many who do not. but similar to patti's advice to me as a 12 year old, though, i feel sorry for those people who do not have passions and interests like it do. it makes life so much more special.

that said, the depression and isolation i read in your note troubles me. do you have a counselor to talk to as well?

[WiCkEd BaCcHaE]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 11:04am

If you don't already have it, get a copy of The Wiz. I went through a period of time where I felt like you do now and I would listen to the song "Soon As I Get Home" many many times. It helped me remember that 'home' is a place where we are completely loved and embraced and, once I got there, I would be fine. Sounds like you are trying to find your home. Don't worry. You will find it.

Until then, find a Scarecrow or Lion to help you along the way and enjoy the road. And don't forget to click your shoes. Just to check. =)

[best12bars]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 11:11am

You're all very supportive, but is Bundy listening to any of this?

Or did he just start a thread and run away?

[bundy5000]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 11:45am

no i am listening. And I appreciate each and every post. "Make new Friends" it sounds so easy but it is very difficult for me

[jpbran]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 11:47am

I was wondering that too...

Also, and I think I'm just burned by too many "sock"-ish posts, but does this seem over the top to anyone else?

"I get light bulbs, cell phones, garbage, cigarettes thrown at me."

"They say how they can't portray the movie on one stage. and that the orchestra is just for show the electronic computers play the music."

Little junior gays REALLY say that???? Ok...

On one hand, I hope I'm right-- hopefully someone is NOT really going through this. If this is real, then I agree with the poster who was questioning the "friends" mention. If these are friends, what are your enemies like????

If real, best of luck. I went through something similar (and still do at 37), and realized that 98% of the public doesn't share my tastes, and that's ok. Even my partner of 6 years doesn't usually want to listen to what I like. But he will in moderation (and I'll listen to his repetitive dance music in moderation too.)

[bundy5000]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 11:58am

the friends that did that were raised in a very bad environment. Always had no money, and when they did they spent it on drugs and alcohol, divorced families, lived downtown, one contracted an STD, always couldnt do anything till they got their social security checks. But I didnt let that impair my relationship with them. A person is a person. No more , no less. I don't want this to be a "get help" "this sounds over the top" I just wanted people to know that how Broadway has turned my life for the better.
And I hope others in my position will embrace Broadway in a way to show them thier not alone they are part of a family of millions of people.

[SporkGoddess]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 12:22pm

I had a lot of people back in high school who claimed to love theatre, but they weren't as passionate about it as I was. Now, in college, I don't know anyone who likes musical theatre (I'm not a theatre major or anything). Or, if they like certain musicals, it's usually the shows that I dislike. And that's fine; I talk about other things with my friends. Sometimes I mention that I saw a show or what have you, but I don't ramble on about them.

I hope that you continue with your counseling, as well.

[jpbran]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 12:24pm

"But I didnt let that impair my relationship with them."

And you also didn't let them throwing "light bulbs, cell phones, garbage, cigarettes" at you impair it either???

Assuming this IS real, it WILL get better as you get older. Find better friends, meet up with new people (carefully) and put those assholes behind you. And like what you like-- sites like this will confirm that there are TONS of others with similar interests.

[KrissySim]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 4:53pm

jpbran , if the post was indeed made by a "sock puppet" or jokester, that person may be in more need of professional help than someone who had posted it in all seriousness.

It may sound a bit over the top, but perhaps it was a way of portraying a perception of something rather than a depiction of a specific event. However, if the poster's friends have emotional problems themselves, the throwing of cell phones and light bulbs may be a relatively normal occurrence.

[bundy5000]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 6:56pm

Maybe if I said "Abuse" it would pan out better for you. I have been in many hospitals and i can't even grasp what some people go through.But I am not trying to concentrate on that. I gave a more detailed representation because I am not some person grieving over a small thing.


But All I know is I might get kicked out of the movie theater during Mamma Mia cause I am already beginning to dance and Jive in my room and in the grocery store. I would so want to buy a Dynamo costume SO MUCH WHEN I SEE IT!!!!

[Hest882]

Posted: 6/30/08 at 7:41pm

Bundy, I just wanted to echo some of the other posters. You're dealing with a whole lot right now, and it's compounded by a circle of friends who have their own set of issues. Someday, I hope, you will be able to acquire friends that support your interests. I know that it doesn't help right now, but there *will* come a time when you'll be able to choose your friends as opposed to just having friends imposed upon you. Best of luck to you and I send you strength (and many fabulous musical distractions!).