The Gospel According To Scott Rudin

Mr Roxy said: "Went to Blackbird tonight & found it to be an engrossing piece of theater. Daniels was fine as was Williams but she looked positively anorexic.



The night was almost ruined by the heavy handed rules laid down by Mr Rudin for attending any of the shows he is associated with. While doing the normal bag search, you find out that if you want to bring in a bottle of water it is confiscated. No drinks with ice in sippy cups is sold . I totally agree with the sippy cup ban. The problem is the drinking water issue is handled as if you were doing a strip search at an airport. My wife brings in water as years ago she had thyroid cancer and sometimes her throat closes up. She keeps water with her to stop her from coughing. The usher told her she could get a cup of water from the bar downstairs. The water is given to you in a cardboard cup but , even though it is in cardboard with no ice, it is still not allowed at your seat..This serves no purpose if you are coughing at your seat. There was a lot of coughing by people tonight which kind of defeats the purpose of no ice or water One guy got up and walked out after about 20 minutes as he needed water and could not have any at his seat.

The second problem is that you are not allowed to leave your seat during the performance if you have to go to the bathroom. If you do, you cannot go back to your seat & have to stand in the back of the house for the rest of the show. One usher told us no latecomers were allowed and pointed to a couple who were turned away last week and given tickets to tonight's show.

To us the tactics were way over the top. Maybe some reason why it is not doing well is people who go tell their friends about these heavy handed tactics and these people do not go. We will make sure we try and avoid a Scott Rudin show in the future because of these draconian rules. During the play, one character looks at the other and said " I want water". Some in the audience wanted it to but were prohibitied.



"I think I have come up with a way to sneak a water bottle in (mine was confiscated at "The Humans" though they put all the confiscated bottles on the bar in the lobby and when you left you could get it back -- but difficult for people who all drank the same brand).



Tie a sweatshirt with a pouch around your waist -- make sure the pouch isn't facing out -- it will be just below your butt, on the inside. Slip the water bottle in there just before you get to the theater, and I swear no one can tell. Just walk slowly so it doesn't 'swing.' I've done it three times since "The Humans" -- I don't drink water during the performance, but I do just before. And I carry a bag that I let them poke through to distract them. I just hope none of the theater police read this.

Speaking of water -- for you travelers -- you CAN take your water bottle through security IF you freeze it the night before. All you have to do is drink the melted water -- the rest is considered a solid and by law they have to let it go through. I have done this in at least 20 airports in the US (don't know if it works internationally). No one tells you. I found out by accident when I froze my water before a trip and was trying to drink as much as I could before having to toss it. A security guard noticed me and told me it was OK because it was ice. It worked! Remember that the next time you are about to fly.

The bit with the ice water shows you how brain dead the government is.

Read my post. My wife had thyroid cancer-her throat sometimes closes up and she needs water to avoid coughing which disturbs others.You suddenly have to go to the John. You can go but you cannot go back to your seat. Is this worth $140 ? If it does not bother you fine. I am not defending my wife's need to have water or having the audacity to want to return to my seat should I have to go to the John. If it is ok with you,fine.

We have numerous threads about people behaving inconsiderately at the theatre- and then someone wants to not consider those around him and apparently it's ok to disturb people if you consider you are a special case.

For goodness sake, use the bathroom before the show, again at the interval (if there is one) and then dash out again at the end. Surely most bladders can cope with that? If not, a box seat may be the answer.

It's like the cellphone argument- "I know they should be switched off, but I just have to keep mine on".

The water thing might be tricky for numerous medical conditions- and in the UK Rudin would probably be in trouble with the laws on access for people with special access needs.

Mr Roxy said: "Read my post. My wife had thyroid cancer-her throat sometimes closes up and she needs water to avoid coughing which disturbs others.You suddenly have to go to the John. You can go but you cannot go back to your seat. Is this worth $140 ? If it does not bother you fine. I am not defending my wife's need to have water or having the audacity to want to return to my seat should I have to go to the John. If it is ok with you,fine.



"

We were just yesterday and this morning waxing nostalgic over the "good old days" but the Scott Rudin rules you describe are EXACTLY the same as those I had to enforce as an usher in 1972. People somehow managed to get through entire acts and even 2 hours of FOLLIES without a bottle of water.

Now your wife's case is clearly different and of course requires no defense here. Is there really no sort of cough drop that can substitute for a drink of water? If not, then I suggest you get a note from her doctor and call the theater in advance to ask how they will accommodate her. Under the Americans with Disabilities Act, I think you'll find they have to accommodate her somehow.

Larry D



I think you know what you can do. To the rest of the understanding souls here , one can hope you are put in a situation like this. I guess the party who was coughing and walked out because of a lack of water really did not like the show. People amaze me sometime and than again they don't.I can tell you some other audience members were none to thrilled with this policy either.

Mr. R, I took your word as to your wife's problem and was trying to be helpful. If that wasn't clear, I apologize.

I have a lot of sinus allergy problems and a tendency to cough if I get too cold, too hot or the air is too still. (Yes, it's a nuisance.) So I carry some sort of mint in a roll that I can unwrap beforehand and keep in my shirt pocket. If I feel a cough coming on, I can reach for one without disturbing anyone and I do so.

I have to say I have been pretty lucky with respect to audience behavior in the past year or so. But I am also a huge fan of the no late seating and no returning to your seat until a break if you leave. I understand people have emergencies but if that happens you will simply have to stand in the back to watch. It's not like they don't let you watch after that. This should be the case at all shows - I mean most already start 8 minutes late to accommodate people who refuse to come on time (or the handful who may have a real reason for it).

As for drinks, I always put one of those small 8 oz water bottles hidden in the bottom of my purse and never have a problem. I consider myself to be a model theatregoer which includes gently taking a sip of water if I need it. The person next to me at a show last week who kept clearing his throat and making weird gurgly sounds was way more distracting than someone taking a sip of water. I can forgive that kind of stuff because we are humans, not robots, but it doesn't mean it doesn't get annoying after a while.

Last night, the FBI would have been proud of the bag check. They really went thru every bag with a fine tooth comb.

In the old days, leaving people cooling their heels outside was unheard of. Bag searches are a sign of the times unfortunately. Security is needed but sometimes in the wrong areas. We now know for a Rudin show we have to find someway to bring in a small thing of water or we do not go. We never come late .

If they are actually thorough and do not consist of obstructing the entrance and poking at one pocket of everyone's bag with a stick just for the illusion of it, maybe he has specific instructions/things to check for. (Like not letting in water bottles.)

It's been interesting to notice all the shared rules at his productions. I like most of them because they make it less likely for the show to be interrupted.

Can't imagine this particular play was great for forgetting troubles, either.