What is the worst review you can give a show? — Page 2

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#26

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/27/06 at 9:10pm

This was from a review for The Scarlet Pimpernel:

Frankly, Scarlet, we don't give a damn.

Broadway.com called Lestat the most hilarious show of the season.

Butters, go buy World of Warcraft, install it on your computer, and join the online sensation before we all murder you. --Cartman: South Park ATTENTION FANS: I will be played by James Barbour in the upcoming musical, "BroadwayWorld: The Musical."

#27

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/27/06 at 9:17pm

"Even LESTAT was better then this!"

#28

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/27/06 at 10:26pm

"At least the theater is gorgeous"

#29

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/27/06 at 10:35pm

"Even LESTAT was better then this!"

hahahaha

"the bathrooms were SPOTLESS!"

"the show was...INTERESTING??"

#30

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/27/06 at 10:38pm

Nice ones Margo! Simon is a tricky one. He is the most vicous critic but he also can admit when he is wrong:

When Stephen Sondheim's Follies arrived in 1971, we critics were pretty obtuse about it. It now emerges as one of our finest musicals and should be on the top-ten list of even those people who, like me, don't believe in list-making.

That original production had the benefit of Harold Prince and Michael Bennett's co-direction and the latter's choreography, of Florence Klotz's eye-popping costumes, and Boris Aronson's magnificent ruin of a set. And, of course, 22 Sondheim songs, each worthy of a musical-comedy hall of fame, if such a thing existed.

Follies has enough life to survive even in a half-alive revival.

#31

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/27/06 at 10:42pm

Does anyone know the source for this quote? I heard that one reviewer in San Francisco said that Lestat was an "insult to the word 'worst'".

"I have got to have some professional music!" - Big Edie

#32

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/27/06 at 11:13pm

My comment about Dance of the Vampires:
"Well...I'll put it this way, it makes "Carrie" look like "Carousel""

http://www.youtube.com/huskcharmer

#33

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/27/06 at 11:18pm

"The scenery was terrific, but the actors kept getting in front of it."

b12 - that made me crack up. I have a set designer who believes the play is all about her set. She said, "The play is OK, but it keeps getting the actors in the way of my set."

I responded, "Maybe that's because your set is problematic."

We ended up having a huge argument (we've never worked well together because she doesn't always understand the play to a full extent) and she finally said, "Fine, do what you want."

Hell, I won't argue with that! Still, we all lost.

Updated On: 10/27/06 at 11:18 PM

#34

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/27/06 at 11:30pm

I remember that the New York Times called In My Life "the real-life Springtime for Hitler"

You can't get much worse than that.

There's a lot I am not certain of...

#35

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/27/06 at 11:49pm

"Worse than TARZAN."

It can't get any worse than that.

"If you are going to do something, do it well. And leave something witchy." -Charlie Manson

#36

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/28/06 at 12:11am

"As an actor [insert female lead name] was not noteworthy and as a singer, she was not worthy of the notes."

I loved the review of Tarzan: "You Tarzan. Me looking at watch."

In our household the standard by which all lousy shows are measured is the Voysey Inheritance, as in, "This is as bad as the Voysey Inheritance done by a middle school."

#37

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/28/06 at 12:15am

Exhibit A:

https://forum.broadwayworld.com/readmessage.cfm?thread=914998

"Winning a Tony this year is like winning Best Attendance in third grade: no one will care but the winner and their mom."
-Kad

"I have also met him in person, and I find him to be quite funny actually. Arrogant and often misinformed, but still funny."
-bjh2114 (on Michael Riedel)

Updated On: 10/28/06 at 12:15 AM

#38

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/28/06 at 3:20am

Another unfortunate case of "when bad shows happen to good actors."

#39

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/28/06 at 6:59am

I think CARRIE got some of the worst reviews ever written.

#40

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/28/06 at 7:06am

"The seats didn't make my butt hurt!"

"I think of avant-garde as downtown shows where you rub waffles and chocolate on yourself."- Hunter Bell

#41

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/28/06 at 7:56am

"(Insert actors name)is responsible for the death of American acting in the 20th Century."

Word for word a quote from a Bus Stop I was in mid-80's.

"Love Life. Live." Michael Bennett

#42

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/28/06 at 11:40am

""(Insert actors name)is responsible for the death of American acting in the 20th Century."

Word for word a quote from a Bus Stop I was in mid-80's."

im so doing that show in february!!! lol. sry, got excited!

#43

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/28/06 at 1:47pm

This is from Richard Ouzounian's recent Toronto Star review of Legends with Joan Collins and Linda Evans. The title was "Divas can't avert disaster." A few choice tidbits:

"When a play starts an 18-city tour, it's the responsibility of the critics in the first venue to offer everyone involved some constructive suggestions. Legends! (which officially opened to the media last night after four weeks of previews) is no exception.

So here's my advice, dudes: close it down and take the tax loss."

--------------

"Joan Collins plays, uh, Joan Collins. She does it very well. She's been doing it for a long time."

--------------

"At one point, the ladies are discussing why producers pick bad scripts. 'I don't suppose,' says one, 'that people ever get together and say "Let's put on a steaming turd!"'

Well, until last night, I would have agreed with them."
Legends Review

#44

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/28/06 at 1:55pm

"The candy at that show was great! I just think they need to work on the show a little bit."

#45

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 10/28/06 at 2:00pm

In regards to my theatre looking gorgeous thing...

"...the theatre was gorgeous. Did you know at [insert theatre that is playing flop] there is a large spot on the ceiling apporximatley 50 feet above seat H 109? Well, I found this out while spending most of act one measuring it with my eyes. There is also a large chandelier above seats B 104-110. It has 4,311 crystal pieces on it."

#46

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 11/16/06 at 4:00pm

lol DRS

"I think of avant-garde as downtown shows where you rub waffles and chocolate on yourself."- Hunter Bell

#47

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 11/16/06 at 4:13pm

"I enjoyed this show as much as I enjoyed my recent colonoscopy."

"The world is a better place because of hairspray." - Michael Ball

#48

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 11/16/06 at 4:17pm

Best 12 Bars - That one about the scenery and the actors nearly made me spit out my drink!

These are hilarious!

"You drank a charm to kill John Proctor's wife! You drank a charm to kill Goody Proctor!" - Betty Parris to Abigail Williams in Arthur Miller's The Crucible

#49

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 11/16/06 at 4:24pm

To the actors in said show:

"Congratulations on learning your lines."

"I saw you up there."

I also think I read where James Agee once published a blank review. Margo, ring any bells?

#50

re: What is the worst review you can give a show?

Posted: 11/16/06 at 4:26pm

Brantley's 'Jekyll & Hyde' review said that 'fog drifts in and out like a wandering attention span. It's easy to sympathize with the fog.'

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