The Next 50 Years of B'way

[mygfdontliveincanada]

Posted: 3/22/06 at 2:27am

Have fun with this. The silly, the serious, the productions you wish would happen. Post them all, and keep adding your predictions...

2007:
Catch Me If You Can wins Best Musical

2008:
Competing against her own "9 to 5," Dolly Parton stars as Dolly Levi in a revival of "Hello, Dolly!"

Oprah Winfrey produces a revival of "Porgy and Bess" starring Brian Stokes Mitchell and Audra McDonald.

After being torn between reviving either "Stop the World! I Wanna Get Off!" or "Pal Joey," Hugh Jackman picks the later and wins another Tony. He reprises the performance on film two years later.

A revival of "Camelot," featuring a King Arthur and Gueneverre that resemble George and Laura Bush, hits Broadway. Critics see how the show's now become a symbol for the fall of America, but George Bush just doesn't get what the simple folk do.

2009:
To cash in on their much publicised feud, producers cast Sarah Jessica Parker and Kim Catrall in "Gentlemen Perfer Blondes" but the actress's fighting over wages and billing keeps the show from ever returning to Broadway.

Lyrics in "Avenue Q" are changed to..."George Bush! Was only for then." Some elderly women complain that it doesn't rhyme with the other lyrics in the song.

Harvey Fierstein replaces Dolly Parton in "Hello, Dolly"

2010:
Chicago finally closes on Broadway.

Adam Guttell and Tony Kushner adapt "Angels in America" into an opera. It wins the Tony for Best Musical over Disney's "Lilo and Stitch."

“The Last 5 Years” is finally produced on Broadway. It wins best revival, and Neil Patrick Harris and Kelli O’Hara win Tonys for their work in it.

2011:
"Kiss of the Spider Woman" is revived with Catherine Zeta-Jones for a 6 month limited engagement. It wins Best Revival over "Mame" with Bernadette Peters in the title role (Bernadette wins best actress).

Hugh Jackman stars as Billy Bigalow in a revival of "Carousel."

Jason Robert Brown's "13" opens on Broadway after years of workshops.

2012:
"Wicked" finally stops casting understudies and replacements as Elphaba and casts Heather Headley in the leading role.

Suzanne Sommers returns to Broadway in her one-woman show “The Girl Hocking Thigh-Masters on the Home Shopping Network.” It closes at intermission.

2013:
Catherine Zeta-Jones stars in the screen version of "Kiss of the Spider Woman" and wins an Oscar for Best Supporting Actress.

2014:
"Desperate Housewives" becomes the first TV show turned musical. Its nude scenes involving a hunky gardner also make it the first Broadway show to card audience members at the door.

Ten years after "Caroline, or Change" closed, the Tony's acknowledges that the show should have won Best Musical and gives a special award to Tony Kushner and Jeanine Tesori.

2015:
Susan Stroman directs a revival of "Crazy for You." It wins the Tony for Best Revival.

2016:
The set designer for the revival of "Sunset Blvd." gets top billing. The show stars Farrah Fawcett as Norma Desmond, but every time she goes on stage she thinks she's in Charlie's Angels. She's immediately replaced by Kristin Chenowith who makes Norma into a cute, ditzy blonde from some distant land called OZ. The show closes in four days, making in the most expensive flop on Broadway. Andrew Lloyd Weber goes bankrupt and gets a job on Hollywood Squares.

Julie Taymor's revival of "Sweeney Todd" wins the Tony for Best Revival.

My classmates Chris Fore, Sara Girard, Robert Bastron, and Jenna Pinkham all win Tonys.

Ok. I did the next 10 years. Carry on, or add on to what I have for 2007-2016.


Updated On: 3/23/06 at 02:27 AM

[munkustrap178]

Posted: 3/22/06 at 2:48am

2017: DIET COKE: THE MUSICAL opens on Broadway to rave reviews, and goes on to win Best Musical, Best Score (Paula Abdul), Best Actress (Amy Sedaris), and Best Direction (Eden Espinoza.)

2018: WORKING is revived on Broadway starring Patrick Duffy as all of the characters. He also plays the entire score on 56 different instruments, while singing. The production is directed by John Doyle and closes after 27 previews and 14 performances. MAMMA MIA! finally closes, but producers promise its return in 5 years.

2019: CATS re-opens at the Winter Garden after nearly a year of re-destroying the theatre for a 4 week only run. Not one ticket is sold, and Cameron Mackintosh and Andrew Lloyd Webber both drown themselves in the Hudson River.

2020: A revival of COMPANY opens starring Neil Patrick Harris and Bebe Neuwirth. Stephen Sondheim directs as well as conducts the orchestra himself. This revival goes on to win 13 Tony Awards, beating out THE PRODUCERS as the most awarded show. It will run for 7 years.

[CATSNYrevival]

Posted: 3/22/06 at 3:17am

2019: After being rescued from a near tragic incident in the Hudson River Andrew Lloyd Webber produces another revival of JESUS CHRIST SUPERSTAR, again, starring Tony Vincent as Judas. This time, Tony actually gets to preserve his performance on a beautiful two disc set recorded on the Really Useful label.

Posted: 3/22/06 at 9:38am

2024: The Roundabout Theatre Company announces plans to bring South Pacific back to Broadway after a 75-year absence. Lindsay Lohan is to star as Ensign Nellie Forbush, with Wilmer Valderrama as Emile de Beque and Aaron Carter as Lt. Joseph Cable.

2026: Mango: The Musical sweeps the 80th annual Tony Awards with wins by leads Chris Kattan and Jennifer Lopez, featured actor nods going to Alec Baldwin and Ana Gasteyer, best book going to Will Ferrell, and best original score going to Queen Latifah.

[Kitzarina]

Posted: 3/22/06 at 9:57am

If Stephen Sondheim is still alive in 2020, he'll be 90 years old. If he can conduct and direct a show, I will personally hock all my belongings and go see it.

[jv92]

Posted: 3/22/06 at 7:57pm

2027: Follies is revived the correct way.
2028: The Phantom of the Opera closes and Andrew Lloyd Webber decides to take a class on music composition.

[Katurian2]

Posted: 3/22/06 at 8:02pm

2030: An Andrew Lloyd Webber show is finally NOT the longest running one on Broadway

2031: To repent, Webber writes what he calls an original and revolutionary musical: Dogs!

[QMAN03]

Posted: 3/22/06 at 8:12pm

2032: Wicked finally ends because some serial killer goes around and kills every tween who ever loved the show.

[catstagestud]

Posted: 3/22/06 at 8:47pm

2035: Hairspray becomes the longest running B'way musical. To celebrate the momentous occassion producers bring in much of the film version's cast to reprise their roles on stage for a six month engagement. John Travolta garners a best replacement Tony for his portrayal of Edna.

[alwy15]

Posted: 3/22/06 at 10:16pm

2036
the producers of hairspray issue an apology, saying that they showed a hologram of hairspray running this whole time--- and it actually closed in 2007. It is NOT the longest running show. Damn producers. Shameless. Really.

Also in this year, Adam Guettel creates an original musical and wins the Pulitzer Prize for Drama.

[BroadwayNick]

Posted: 3/22/06 at 10:21pm

Mygfdontliveincanada, I could see most of that happening...and some of it wouldn't be that bad! I'd love to see how much of it actually comes true! Thank you for making my night.

[thez914]

Posted: 3/22/06 at 10:24pm

2040: Brooklyn: the Musical is chosen as part of ENCORES!, is lauded by critics and audiences alike, moves to Broadway and becomes the longest running Revival of a Musical.

[peggyandvelma]

Posted: 3/22/06 at 10:30pm

"Andrew Lloyd Weber goes bankrupt and gets a job on Hollywood Squares."

Laughed out loud. Thank you.


2041
The Tony Awards are not held because all the Wicked tweens are now middle-aged and have boycotted musical theatre for stripping them of their eardrums, vocal cords and their childhoods.

Updated On: 3/22/06 at 10:30 PM

[waddledee524]

Posted: 3/23/06 at 12:42am

2041: After the aforementioned incident involving Andrew Lloyd Weber drowning himself in the Hudson, his family went through his belongings. They found an unreleased manuscript of a musical involving people in jet packs singing as they buzz around the theatre and fly around the mezzanine. It runs for a fortnight but is forced to close due to carbon monoxide poisoning from jet-pack exhaust in an unventilated theatre.

[DryMartini]

Posted: 3/23/06 at 9:49am

2032: Cher plays herself in the leading role of her biography "If I Could Turn Back Time" and looks better than ever. Madonna is her understudy.

[CATSNYrevival]

Posted: 3/23/06 at 10:25pm

2035: Disney acquires property in Times Square, forces the existing tenets to vacate and tears down the existing structures making way for a new towering Disney Times Square Resort complete with three brand new state of the art Broadway houses. The first show produced is SPIRIT: STALLION OF THE CIMARRON. The show features alternating celebrity guest narrators and is sung by a lone vocalist with Choreography by Twyla Tharp danced by an ensemble who dress as horses and Indians in costumes designed by the latest winner of "Project Runway".

2036: Matthew Bourne stages a revival of his SWAN LAKE, but this time decides to cut the foreplay and simply has his male swans dance in the nude... Updated On: 3/23/06 at 10:25 PM

[Holly Therese]

Posted: 3/23/06 at 10:42pm

You are all hillarious. I love this board.

[CATSNYrevival]

Posted: 3/23/06 at 11:25pm

2037: Down and out, the Roundabout Theatre Company stages a second revival of their CABARET at Studio 54. This time not only is the inside of the theatre made to look like the Kit-Kat-Klub, but all of New York City is decorated to look like Nazi Germany. Jewish tourists get so confused that they flee the city and the mayor has to go on television to explain the misunderstanding encouraging tourists to return to New York and see a Broadway show.
Updated On: 3/23/06 at 11:25 PM

[Ourtime992]

Posted: 3/23/06 at 11:32pm

Adam Guettel will indeed win a Pulitzer, but it won't take 30 years. Mark my word.

[TheEnchantedHunter]

Posted: 3/23/06 at 11:36pm

2007: Following a nuclear attack, Times Square is wiped off the face of the map and Broadway as we know it disappears forever. However, in June of 2008, Barbra Streisand presents a concert in the smoking ruins of the Winter Garden theater (where she appeared in FUNNY GIRL) and charges $1500 for the privilege. Outraged flesh-eating mutant zombies stone her and suck out her brain.


Daisy Buchanan
Long Island, New York

[Ourtime992]

Posted: 3/23/06 at 11:53pm

she has a brain?

[Theatreboy49]

Posted: 3/24/06 at 12:06am

by far the best thread i have read since i joined this site. I must say ALW on Hollywood squares would be acutally amazing. And destroy brooklyn now so encores never get their hands on it.

[catstagestud]

Posted: 3/24/06 at 12:48am

2013: SIDE SHOW is revived staring Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen as Daisy and Violet, respectively. Alongside the former Full House stars are John Stamos as Terry Conner and Usher as Jake. The revival goes on to re-coup its investment and spawn a national tour headed by Alice Ripley and Emily Skinner's daughters Amelia and Kathryn.

[TheEnchantedHunter]

Posted: 3/24/06 at 12:52am

"She has a brain?"


And very tasty. So I'm told.


Allison MacKenzie
Peyton Place, New Hampshire

[Link Larkin Wanabe]

Posted: 3/24/06 at 1:09am

2017 - Jenna Leigh Green wins a Tony for Leading Actress in a Musical. She is sure to thank her husband, Akiva, for all his love, sex, and support.

Akiva