the EPITOME of tasteless audiences..... — Page 6

Get a load of this story:

I was at a performance of Jekyll & Hyde minding my own business, when I notice a movement out of the corner of my eye. It is an ~85 year old woman leaving the side aisle to go to the bathroom during "A New Life". Well, well, well that didn't sit well with Ms. Linda Eder. Linda stopped the song and asked the woman:

"Where the hell are you going you worthless excuse for a person?"
"Ummm, the powda room!" The woman replied
"Really?"
"Yes"
"Get her"

Linda snapped her fingers and in 5 seconds Frank Wildhorn Apparated into the theatre, he took out a piece of paper and gave this woman the worst papercut she ever got. She died shortly thereafter. True Story.

The moral of this story is: Fosse beat Civil War fair and square, it should have gone to Parade if anything.

---

I forgot to say that all these posts make me want to beat all the rude people in this world.

As far as dress goes again, theatre/show definetely makes a difference. Still, I personally wouldn't wear jeans to anything but high school theatre.

today at Sweet Charity, the audience wouldnt stop talking during the entracte and overture, and well into the first song of each act

I had to join the boards just so I could share some stories...

When I saw RENT on tour the 2nd time in February this year, we missed rush, so we got tickets in the 2nd to last row of the balcony for like, $10. Anyways there were some undeducated-but-still-enthusiastic-about-the-show rentheads with their black book and all, gushing about how they wanted the $20 front row seats or something. Not a problem, all of us RENTheads were there at some point. They weren't the nuisance. It was this girl behind me, who would pull out her cell phone every 5 seconds, she kept dropping things out of her purse, and kept rummaging around inside her purse making all kinds of noise, and used her cell phone as the flashlight. So distracting. I called some people during some songs but made sure my phone was as dim as possible and under my jacket so the light didn't illuminate three rows in front of me. Plus she kept laughing and many, many times sang (loudly and off-key) along with the show. I didn't say anything but at intermission I know she overheard my friend and I complaining about her, so she stopped for the most part.

Then when I was in "Up the Down Staircase" a few years ago, during a student matinee, this sixth grader farted right in the middle of a dramatic pause. We all had to keep ourselves in check so we didn't laugh, becuase at the time, we were all supposed to be frozen.

I also get annoyed at the old people who see Sunday matinees and feel the need to clap obnoxiously when the overture doesn't start the millisecond that it's supposed to. There was a large group of old people doing that at the junior ring ceremony last week at my school and I was so annoyed. I don't know if this is an old tradition to let the cast and crew know that they need to start..or what. In any case it's obnoxious and rude, there could be so many reasons why a show starts a little late.

---

Nobody said anything about blowing up any state!

---

This didn't happen to me (my parents witnessed this) and it happened at a movie, but it's too good not to share:
My parents saw the movie "Philadelphia" when it was in theaters. At the very start of the movie, when the title PHILADELPHIA comes on screen and Bruce Springsteen's title song starts, a woman behind them said to a friend, "That's the Golden Gate Bridge."
Not tasteless, but incredibly stupid...

---

The lady sitting next to me at The Lion King back in November stared filming Hakuna Matata. She was Japanese, obviously a tourist, so I let it slide...it still pissed me off though.

She wouldn't have understood me if I told her to turn it off anyway.

---

at christmas i was doing panto and those audiences are always killers - full of really tiny kids who would normally be considered too young to be in a theatre.
well, the girl playing cinderella came stumbling off stage after one of her ballads to fumy that a woman had been breast feeding her baby on the second row! cinders couldn't take her eyes off it/them!

"Israelis in back of me constantly explaining Gem of the Ocean to each other. Of course, they had to be speaking Hebrew. If it was Mandarin or something I might have been able to tune it out as incomprehensible background noise. "

What makes Hebrew different from any other language Plum? It's no less annyonig than English, Spanish, French, etc. Yes, the talking was rude, but not especially so because of the language it was in.

---

I think it is because Hebrew is a language that Plum understands, so it was much harder to tune out.

---

At Lincoln Center when Patti Lupone was in ANything Goes...the guy next to me kept sniffing loudly, but sporadically. I finally saw him in the corner of my eye snorting what I thought to be cocaine. I was too intimidated to say anything.

The opening weekend of Les Mis, I had 6th row center, and the guy next to me who reaked of booze not only fell asleep, but slid onto the floor until the standing ovation. I got a little panicky, thinking he was dead. Both instances the guy appeared to be at the theatre alone.

I recall when Kate Hepburn stopped West Side Waltz in Boston when some woman took a flash pic from the balcony. Miss Kate came to the edge of the stage, demanded the house lights brought up and publicly reamed the poor embarrassed woman out, as she was led from the building to applause.

Wow. Sniffing coke -- that's really not good to sit there and watch. I'd be really distracted, and frankly that's not what you need in a theatre...

I went to see Phantom of the Opera, and someone tapped me on the shoulder during intermission and asked when Rent was starting. I was too horrified to reply.

---

I was in nthe theatre in London and this cretin pulls out his cell phone and is telling someone, "Naw, naw, really man, he sucks. Then he looks at the stage and says to one of the ators, I guess,"YOU SUCK!" A few rows in front of me, this big guy, I mean really big turns around, sees who it is and points it out to the guy beside him. They get up, walk back grab the guy and HAUL him out of the house.

After the show, the house manager is talking to two policemen. I guess they wanted him to identify the improptu "house manager" but he let the two bruisers walk right past him and obviously he didn't point them out.

Hell, I'd have given them free passes.

---