Joel Grey Comes Out Publicly: 'I'm a Gay Man' — Page 6

You should listen to the recording and read the memoir ASAP, if you haven't.

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"This thread has taught me that I need to talk to themysteriousgrowl about sexuality more."

Let's make that this year's FI theme.

No, wait. Let's NOT.

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As well you know, growl, anything goes when it's 3am and you're sitting in the kitchen eating leftovers and talking about Mary Testa.

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Updated On: 1/30/15 at 02:58 PM

"As well you know, growl, anything goes when it's 3am and we're sitting in the kitchen eating leftovers and queening out about Mary Testa."

Fixed that for you

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That is EXACTLY what we were doing.

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That was in response to growl's fix!

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Ever since my early days in the theatre[70s] I[male] always had an unusual girls name that started with the first letter of my surname. It was a friendly familiar nick-name amongst cast members.
One name stuck and my 6 best friends very rarely to this day call me by my real name.
When I talk to myself[often], I always address myself by my feminine name.
Self revelation but I love the fact that I 'wear so many different hats' and different aspects of me are not revealed to everyone.

People in general love to speculate and even then don't want to believe the truth.
I would certainly never be called a masculine man but if you, as a poster above said-put me in a room of footballers[please!] I would appear most feminine but I have gone through life with a certain style, created by myself, copying others but my uniqueness is mine alone- 'I am my own special creation'-no wonder this is a gay anthem.

Joel Grey--look what you started--who knew?

For my first few years here, I had this photo of Dolores Gray as my avatar, just because I've always loved her abrasive outrageousness--and I've always loved the idea of a diva ending a musical number with her arms at ten-and-two. (Dolores's arms here are at eleven-and-five, because, well, Dolores.)



But at one of the early Joe's Pub gatherings, a female board member said, upon meeting me, "I expected you to come in drag!" When I asked why, she said, "Because of that icon."

Shortly thereafter, I switched to Gene Kelly pictures, not out of any shame at being thought of as female or in-drag, but because I thought a picture of Gene was more on-message with my screen name. Plus, he's nicer and everyone likes him. Dolores is the other side of me, the part that's abrasive and doesn't care if I outrage others.

I've thought of bringing her back, but each time I decided I don't really want to be her.

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You name your son Jessica Smith, and he's gonna have some baggage, even if he goes by Jesse. You name your son Jessica Lange Smith, and he's gonna have some identity issues. You name your son Jessica Rabbit Smith, and you just home brewed a female impersonator.

Oh Jessica- the first female genitalia most nineties kids ever saw on film.

Disney went back and edited a couple things out for home releases - a middle finger and a couple frames from Jessica's dress hiking up (where you see the crotch AREA, with odd coloring, but you can't tell exactly if they were going for some sort of underwear or indeed an animator having fun) is what I remember.

Side note: Would The Little Mermaid have survived on Broadway if they included the penis-shaped castle in their designs?

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I was always made fun of for being effeminate when I was young. I don't know if I've modulated my behavior or if it's a code-switching thing or if it's because times have changed, but I'm always surprised when someone else expresses surprise when they find out I'm gay. All I know is that I never worry about whether or not I'm too queeny anymore. I encourage all gay men to let that crap go, too, because it's liberating. I always think it's sh¡tty when gay guys make fun of other gay guys for "being too gay" or whatever. THAT's usually when I whip out "Mary" this or "Mary" that, when I got someone worried about being straight acting that they are bordering on self-parody.

But still, I graduated high school in 1992 and I grew up in the Midwest, and sometimes it really does astound me how far we've come and how things of changed in the nearly quarter of a century since then. I do admit that I'm a little envious of the kids who get to have GSAs and let their queen flags fly nowadays, but I do hope gay kids out there general had it easier than I did. Or do, I guess, because I still get a couple of "faggots" or similar similar hurled at me out of the blue every few years.*

Now I'm one of the people on a Broadway message board who has a feminine screen name. I do think if I were part of a poof of gays that call each other ladies' names that I'd like to be calked Phyllis. Or Lisa.

And if we're sharing things that make us queen out, for me it is that moment in the Audra/Marin/Judy Kuhn ALW trio when they get to "I neve thought I'd come to this." Sometimes it makes me cry!



*It should go without saying that in situations where a gay guy thinks his personal safety may be compromised, he might want to downplay his queerness. There's nothing inauthentic or shameful about self-preservation.

Updated On: 1/31/15 at 12:43 AM