Hilarious Comments Overheard By Tourists and Audience Members- Page 10

Posted: 6/17/06 at 10:58pm

Like in my sig - I overheard these two, um, ladies discussing the Playbill at DRS. One was convinced that she remembered that NLB played one of the monkeys in Wicked. Even though she had the Playbill (which does list the roles an actor has played). Her friend (who had the same Playbill) insisted on calling JONATHAN Pryce Michael throughout the whole show.

Man next to me: What, John Lithgow isn't in this show?!?!?! (Same Playbill, etc)

Oy

My three wishes:

1. Please read the playbill so you'll have a clue as to what's going on.
2. Please have an idea of what you're going to see.
3. Please keep making these theater faux pas' so we can have more material to write :)

[antman]

Posted: 6/17/06 at 11:17pm

So, I'm in the hallway at school and here this two random kids talking to each other.

Kid 1: Man, why do all the black kids have to be getting into these gang wars and bring guns and knives to school.
Kid 2: Hey, that's racist!
Kid 1: Yeah, well we're all sorta racist.
Kid 2: Hey, that's the name of a musical!
Kid 1: Really?
Kid 2: Yeah, I was listening to my friend's Ipod and it went to a song about rascism and said it was from a musical called "Everyone's a little bit racist."
Kid 1: What was it about?
Kid 2: Racism, I think, but it was really funny, I remember that.
Kid 1: Cool, maybe we should go see it one day.
Kid 2: Yeah, it sounded really good!
Updated On: 6/18/06 at 11:17 PM

[clarkstallings]

Posted: 6/17/06 at 11:33pm

At Wicked in Atlanta, the elderly lady sitting next to me asked me if the Time Dragon over the stage was a part of the show or if it was a permanent installation? It isn't too funny, as themed as the Fox is, I can see her point, but part of it is funny for some reason.

[SeptemberKel]

Posted: 6/17/06 at 11:35pm

Along the same line as the Passion/Passions thing, I was at Wonderful Town and the lady behind me says, "Donna Murphy was Fosca in Passions?! I watch that every day, and I don't remember any character by that name! She probably was an extra once - either that or they killed her off real quick. I can't imagine she's any good."

Oy.

[LizzieCurry]

Posted: 6/17/06 at 11:36pm

Antman, FYI: "racist."

[deardarling]

Posted: 6/17/06 at 11:47pm

My friends at Godspell at a regional theatre...
Friend 1: Hey, whats GODSPELL about anyways?
Friend 2: Maybe God.
Friend 1: What about the spell?
Me: Oh my God...
Friend 2: We've already figured that one out, Mackenzie!

Oy vey and I actually knew them...

[jasonf]

Posted: 6/17/06 at 11:52pm

Because of this thread, I especially had my ears open today when I was in the city. Sure enough:

In the bathroom during the intermission of The Wedding Singer:

Man 1: That was an exciting journey
Man 2: It's not over yet.
Man 1: Really? I thought it was.
Man 2: No, it's just intermission
Man 1: Oh, so I guess they get married or something.
Man 2: I don't know, we'll have to see.
Man 1: I think I'm drunk or something
Man 2: Did you have anything to drink?
Man 1: I had one before - at the bar - and one before that...

At that point I was trying so hard not to laugh I had to leave.

[defyingravity11]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 12:10am

This wasn't by a tourist, but I had brough "Broadway: The American Musical" into my musical theater class at school... So we get up to the part where they show clips from the Tony Awards for La Cage.

When they show the red Tony logo onstage, this kid in my class turns to me and says: "Oh Tony! That's a good show!"

I just about died! I hate it when people act as if they know everything when they're clueless.
Updated On: 6/18/06 at 12:10 AM

[Mythus]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 12:55am

Back when I saw North Shore Music Theatre's Camelot in Boston...they had Mordred sit in one of the boxes and watch the play for the first act, at some points amused, at some bored...and then he got really interested when things took a turn for the worse...and of course, he left for his entrance onstage, which I think is in Act Two, but don't quote me on that. ANWYAY. During intermission, I overheard the people in front of me talking.

Guy: Hey, it says here this guy's been in Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor.
Me: (quietly) ...Dreamcoat...
Mom: (snicker)
Woman: Did you see that guy up in the box [Mordred]?
Woman2: The woman?
Woman: I think it's a guy.
Woman2: No, it's a woman, did you see her hair?
Woman: Who is she?
Me: (tries to hide hysterical laughter)
Mom: (pats me on the back)

[justagirl2]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 2:20am

My friend Alex is ridiculously dumb. We just saw Wicked last week, and after the show was over:

Alex: "The sound system was really bad. I mean, I could only understand what Glinda and Elphaba and that guy whose name starts with F, and the Wizard and that old lady and the sister and the munchkin dude and the teacher were saying, I never heard the other people's lines. Their mikes must not have been on."
Me: "WHAT?"
Alex: "The people who sang in the beginning, and danced and everything, I never heard them say their lines!"
Me: "Alex, that's the ensemble. They don't have individual lines."
Alex: "Well, God, what's the point of having a bunch of people up there if they aren't going to say anything? Oh, I know, are they just the people who really wanted the main parts and didn't get them, so they snuck on stage?"

I kid you not.

And this was after the conversation in which he asked me if the list of songs in the playbill were the different acts. I told him those were the names of the songs in the show, and he said "Wait, they SING in this? They don't sing in the Wizard of Oz movie! Wait, this isn't the same story?"

I'm really proud of myself that I didn't kill him. Never, ever again.

[Dre2387]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 3:01am

justagirl, that is hilarious!

I don;t have any stories, but I will when I go in later.

here is something that I overheard near Broadway:

one guy to another: "The best way to end this day is to find a hooker."

[gumbo2]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 4:01am

Sweeney Todd with my mom. To her credit it was a matinee after a long night...but she pretty much was asleep for the whole first act, and woke up right before A Little Priest, and I made her stay up for the 2nd act. Considering she had never seen the show before she had absolutely NO idea what was going on. I just found it funny. But this is the woman who HATED Light in the Piazza and absolutely loved Wicked.

[Calvin]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 11:49am

I remembered another one.

At MGM (or maybe it was Universal, as I was only 13 at the time) they had a special show where they would select audience members to act out famous scenes from TV in front of a blue screen, splicing the audience members into the shows live. It was scenes from all the TV shows that were popular at the time -- Cheers, The Golden Girls, etc. -- as well as classics, like the I Love Lucy scene at the chocolate factory.

As we lined up to get in, I guess one lady close to us had misunderstood the show description, because I heard her ask: "Does anyone know when Lucille Ball is going to get here?"

Even if she hadn't been dead for several years, did she really think Lucille Ball would be doing 6 shows a day in Orlando?

[Wanna Be A Foster]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 12:01pm

I was standing outside the Broadway Theatre a couple months ago, looking at the marquee and photos, and these two women tourists (one was wearing a fanny pack) were walking by. One of them stops, looks up at the marquee and says to the other, "Oh, look, it's Oprah Winfrey Presents The Colored People." The other one stops, looks up and says "Oh wow" or something to that effect, nods, then continued to walk on by.

Now obviously the woman misread the marquee. I can understand misreading a marquee, but to not recognize the name of the American classic novel or, in their case, the movie, "The Color Purple", or to think that Oprah Winfrey would produce a show called "The Colored People"? Oh dear. That was quite a moment.

Updated On: 6/18/06 at 12:01 PM

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 12:18pm

I should have a million of these stories but i've either blocked them out or I just haven't been paying attention.

the funniest thing I do remember hearing a tourist say was this very loud teenage girl with a valley girlish voice leaving her hotel on 8th ave:

If I don't get some lotion on my ass crack I'm gonna FREAK OUT!

[wickedrentq]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 12:21pm

Calvin, it was MGM. Superstar television. I miss that attraction.

Posted: 6/18/06 at 1:19pm

I go to a very small high school in Indiana and there are very few people involved in theatre. Because of this, almost all of my friends aren't into Broadway.

I went to New York over fall break last year where I saw Spamalot, Wicked, and The Producers. I had seen Spamalot when Hank Azaria was on hiatus and Alan Tudyk replaced him. That monday after fall break I was showing my friends my stage door pictures at lunch.

I showed them the picture of Alan Tudyk and I and there was a chorus of, "OH MY GOD! THAT'S STEVE THE PIRATE FROM DODGEBALL!!!!"

[luvtheatre11]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 1:40pm

sitting behind us at the original production of Les Miz..
Man: Does this show have a happy ending?
Woman: I am sure It does..after all, it's on Broadway!

[iHeartMyGeek]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 2:18pm

Well, our school (a Creative and Performing Arts high school) was going on a trip to New York. On the third night of the trip we were scheduled to go ice-skating at Central Park but if we got a slip igned and tok money we were allowed to go to shows on our own. By now, I had been a fan of RENT for several years but never had been able to see it live so I was very excited to have the chance to finally see it on my own.

So I discussed this with a girl in my chemistry class and she said "oh, why bother? no one good will be in it besides maybe Jesse L. martin." I stared at her. Mind you, this was in February of this year. THe fact atht the girl was a MUSICAL THEATER major and thought that it was possible that Jesse L. Martin would still be playing Collins on Broadway was absolutely mind-blowing to me.

[alwy15]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 3:23pm

during piazza, referring to clara, during a tender moment of the show

(in a thick new york dialect)

elderly woman #1: What's going oooon!
elderly woman #2: She's retaaaaaaaaaaarded.

end scene.

[goldenstate5]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 4:10pm

"I was standing outside the Broadway Theatre a couple months ago, looking at the marquee and photos, and these two women tourists (one was wearing a fanny pack) were walking by. One of them stops, looks up at the marquee and says to the other, "Oh, look, it's Oprah Winfrey Presents The Colored People." The other one stops, looks up and says "Oh wow" or something to that effect, nods, then continued to walk on by."

Sounds less like a misread and more like a clever, yet racist joke between two stupid tourists...

[Dot2]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 4:25pm

I don't have many good ones, but this thread is amazing.

I was in a community production of "Peter Pan", and there is a point where Cpt. Hook had just discovered Peter's glass of milk and was planning to poison it. Hook lifted the glass and said, "What's this?" and a little boy in the audience called out, "It's milk!" "I think you're right," Hook replied. "It's milk!" Cute moment.

It seems "Rent" has caused more than its fair share of confusions - a friend of mine went to see it with her mother and they didn't realize that the characters had AIDS until almost the end, so they were pretty confused as to why they all had such a downer outlook on life.

When I saw "Rent" in NY with my high school drama group, one girl was heard to loudly inquire at the end of "Contact": "Where did Angel go? Why did she just randomly walk offstage?"

[Color and Light]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 4:50pm

I was in a community production of "Peter Pan", and there is a point where Cpt. Hook had just discovered Peter's glass of milk and was planning to poison it. Hook lifted the glass and said, "What's this?" and a little boy in the audience called out, "It's milk!" "I think you're right," Hook replied. "It's milk!" Cute moment

That is the cutest thing I've ever heard! Thanks for sharing that!

[Mythus]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 5:11pm

This isn't so much as show...but this group called Pastimes does faires at Hammond Castle, this little castle in my town. Like, they do a Robin Hood Faire and so on. A while back, they did a faire for Christmas...I forget what it was called, but throughout the day they did the story of A Christmas Carol. The little boy who played Tiny Tim was the director's son, and he was itsy bitsy. He must've been two or three.

So at the end of the day, the story was over, and it was time for the line "God bless us, everyone!" So they hauled little Tiny Tim up on their shoulders and gave him his cue...

...and he said, "My bum hurts."

[kate2]

Posted: 6/18/06 at 5:45pm

On the bus back to the ferry after seeing Sweeney, there was this girl (early 20's I'd say) sitting behind me. Her phone rang and this is what I heard when she picked it up...(she talked SO LOUD about something that should've been kept quiet)

"HEEYYYY GUUURRLLLLL! DID YOU LOOK INTO MY PAP TEST RESULTS?"
-- pause --
"OH THATS GREAAAT, GUUUUURL! THANKS, GUUURL! DID YOU HEAR ANYTHING ABOUT MY OTHER STD TESTS?"
-- another pause--
"OH THANKS, GUUURL! THATS SO GREAT, THANKS, GUURL!!"

I was cracking up and turned around and just laughed in her face.. so she moved to the back of the bus, but continued to talk just as loud. So this other guy sitting near me turns around and says "GUUUUURRRLLLL, WE CAN STILL HEAR YOU!"

I think I lost about 10 pounds from laughing so hard.