How To Not Be Creepy At Stage Door- Page 3

[marcblack]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 5:34am

Updated On: 10/28/10 at 05:34 AM

[mikem]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 7:25am

On a tangential note, have there been many non-African-American Simbas, or is Adam Jacobs the first? (I believe his mother is Filipina and his father is Caucasian.)

[BroadwayGirl107]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 8:09am

Wow, I love how ridiculous some people's rules are about stage-dooring. I'm in agreement that it's gotten out of control, but to imply that saying "great job" or complimenting previous work an actor has done is rude, is one of the goddamn dumbest things I've ever heard of. "Great job" probably isn't the most eloquent way to put it (if you can only squeak out two words, somehow "Nice work," always seems to sounds more pointed and genuine), but you'd have to be one egotistical, cynical, miserable actor to take any kind of offense to that. And if you happen to throw into the conversation that not only did you enjoy me in this, but you also enjoyed me in something I was in in the past? Well, that's lovely!

I think the bottom line with the stage-door is...WHY are you doing it? If you are waiting at the stage door because you just want an autograph, picture, or (and this is far far worse than the former two) you just want to become chummy with an actor, you're kind of wasting everyone's time. You're not going to become friends with the actor by waiting at the stage door. If you saw a show and were moved by the piece as a whole, a particular actor's work, or have been consistently moved by a particular person's work in the past, I think it's quite wonderful for you to simply shake that person's hand and say "Thank you" or "That was really wonderful" or "I was really moved by..." etc etc. And then if you are so inclined to ask for a picture or an autograph, and they are willing and are not being hounded, fine. (Sidenote: To this day, I don't understand why people want or need autographs at all, but since they are pretty harmless, if you must ask, I suppose it's fine)

I'll add..Once you've said your thank you or complimented who you wanted to...go home or go out and get you're post-theater drinks. Don't wait around watching them finish while others are pushing and shoving to get through; if they are the last people out, don't bother everyone and anyone who comes out of the door. If you have nothing in particular to say to someone, then don't! I promise, they will not be offended! There's no need to bother people who didn't particularly move you with disingenuous compliments out of "courtesy," or inquiries about the person you ACTUALLY have something to say to.

Just be respectful and genuine. Don't be ingratiating and selfish. That pretty much covers all bases.

[LesMiz24601]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 2:27pm

wow

First of all I do NOT hope to offend anyone by my comments, but do want to chime in

I have been reading some of the comments on stage dooring on this board for some time now, and am amazed at the level it has been brought to.

For people talking about a new "phenomenon" of stage dooring I would say that stage dooring has been around ever since there has been live performances. Does it gain popularity based on certain shows, certain stars, certain Broadway seasons with more star power?? Sure it does...but it is nothing new

For some people it is part of the experience, and for some it is not...but people shouldn't judge or assume people enjoy it more than the show...alot of people just like meeting the performers after the show and there is nothing wrong with that.

Reading pages and pages of "rules" not just on this thread, but also in past threads, makes think...how far is this being taken. I see thes rules as rules "things that would upset the person writing these rules, if they were an actor"

The real fact of the matter is almost any actor KNOWS that there are fans of all types. They KNOW people will say innapropiate things every now and then...of course they are people and deserved to be treated with respect, but they are people not gods.

My rule is a single line: act with respect and common sence

________________________________________________________________


"Do not refer to an actor by their character's name.(i.e "OMG there's Uncle Fester!"

COME ON! This happens all the time...fans do not know a name, or they make a mistake...I am sure the actor doesn't care

Do not say "You did a good job!". They know.

That is probably the most ridiculous thing I have ever read on this board, who wouldn't appreciate a compliment?

Is it common sence to follow a person home? NO

Is it commons sence to "yell" at ANY PERSON, NO

I would venture to say the person in the video is not the average person at the stage door, and actors know that. They know every now and then someone will act innapropiately, which is all that person was doing. He did not abide by my rule, which is applicable in most social situations.

I love how some think that they are the definitive source on the rules of stage dooring, but the fact is actors know what there are MANY different types of fans....As Bill Holden once said "Its when they stop looking, that I will worry." It couldn't be more true. I am sure that any actor who enters the live theater, knows there is a possibility that they will be addressed outside of the theater. If they are bothered by this, then they choose to opt out, like Nathan Lane sometimes does.


"the absolute worst thing that I find unconscionable and inappropriate, is when people compliment actors on their prior roles in other works, rather than the performance at hand. It's classless and irrelevant."

Any actor who walks outside the stage door, has enough brains to know that a person who calls him or her by their name onstage, or compliments another work, or says "good job" probably does not mean any harm. It is not classless. Some people don't know what to say, and a compliment is a compliment.

For people who feel "terrible" for actors swarmed by people at the stage door...I would say "really"? The larger the crowd, the better I feel for the actor! Name me ONE starting actor who hopes nobody will EVER beg for them to sign a playbill?

If their safety was compromised I would absolutely feel bad, but I am sure every actor enjoys the stardom, or they wouldn't walk into the theater. If they don't again, they can leave another exit, or make alternative arangments. Most (In my opinion) don't seem to mind.

"It's a workday for these people; how would you feel if some jamoke approached you after work and asked for your autograph and yammered on and on about how much they loved the data entry you did at your last job when you're tired, maybe stressed, likely trying to remember where the hell you parked your car"

As someone else already mentioned, their living is based on the fan's interest in them or the production. It is NOT the same thing as "any other job" If they don't like it they can avoid the stage door, again most don't.

I find it offensive when people consider waiting in a designated area on a public street "stalking."....it isn't...thats why the baricades are setup....following them home is a different story and may even constitute legal action as leginimate stalking.

In conclusion, I just hope people don't take everything too far, trying to disern what actors like and dislike. Just treat anyone (actor, fan, ticket taker, parent, whoever!) with mutual respect...thats all...there is no need to tell people what to say and what not to say and what is appropiate or not appropiate...actors were not born yesterday. In the end, if actors were offended they wouldn't come out.

[MadonnaMusical]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 2:39pm

I think stagedooring has gotten out of control mostly because of facebook. Everyone wants their picture with a celeb....

[eatlasagna]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 3:37pm

not quite stagedooring... but I lived in Hollywood for 6 years and there came a point when meeting celebrities became just really lame... I get why people do it, but I think I grew out of it quickly after meeting a famous person who just didn't seem all that friendly... it made me realize that no matter how famous the person is, they are just like everybody else... but yeah... i do agree that it's all about common sense... and I don't think there should be rules, but just common etiquette... but then again... most people these days don't follow etiquette for most things!

[orangeskittles]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 6:14pm

I have to say, anyone who can't take the compliment "Great job" in stride has a bigger etiquette problem than any well-meaning fan.

[Yankeefan007]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 9:43pm

I wish I was around during the days when one could swing by the stage door, pick up a chorine at the stage door, buy her a drink and get laid.

Like Eugene O'Neill did.

[ghostlight2]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 9:51pm

Ah, yes! Or to even go back further to the good old days, when actresses were considered little better than prostitutes!

[Yankeefan007]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 10:01pm

This thread, after reading through it all, is absolutely ridiculous.

Do any of you really think actors you meet at the stage door care how you behave or what you say to them? Half of 'em don't even make eye contact with you. They wouldn't be able to pick you out of a line-up.

[ghostlight2]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 10:28pm

I can't imagine why you would say that. Actors certainly care how they're treated at the stage door by fans, and most will definitely recognize those who appear more than once. Though not necessarily in a good way.
Updated On: 10/27/10 at 10:28 PM

[luvtheEmcee]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 10:43pm

^ Yeah, that.

[orangeskittles]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 10:53pm

Yankeefan, those girls only slept with rich men who could be their ticket to retirement from show business, so I don't think you'd be as lucky.

[CockeyedOptimist2]

Posted: 10/27/10 at 11:31pm

There are people like Jason Danieley and Marin Mazzie who have repeatedly said that they really love the stage door time when they can speak to people, some of whom were very emotionally affected by the show, especially those who have friends or family members going through the same thing. It's a very specific show, but it seems some actors relish the opportunity to interact with their fans.

On the other hand, there was Alice. I blame her, perhaps unfairly, for the crazy fangirls that Next to Normal has generated.

[dragonlp86]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 2:13am

I've stagedoored a couple of times, and they've almost all been pleasant experiences. Most of the actors seem to enjoy the face-to-face time with the fans, hearing what they have to say and see how the show affected them. The only 'bad' experiences I've had were at the Rent tour, Promises, and La Cage. With La Cage, people were pushing and shoving from behind where I was standing. RENT was just...insane. And some girl was crying because Anthony Rapp signed her scarf...

My experience with 'Promises' leads me to add another rule to stagedooring: DO NOT CHANT THE NAME OF AN ACTOR WHO HAS NOT COME OUT YET. This woman was being so rude, asking EVERYONE about Sean Hayes and chanting his name. We eventually just left because of her, and the crowd.

All of the other times, however, have been very pleasant. The best being 'Next to Normal', I think, mostly because of the intimate nature of the show and the small cast. As for touching, I agree that it can be very creepy. You shouldn't be the one to initiate anything; let the actor decide that. I've met people who just stand there, put an arm on your shoulder, and a few who will pull you in a big bear hug if you let them.

[millie_dillmount]

Posted: 10/28/10 at 3:22am

I think LesMiz summed it up pretty well.

Regarding an actor's past work - whats wrong with complimenting them on it? Some people just get nervous and don't know what to say, so that may be the first thing that pops into their mind. Actors are busy signing many autographs and tending to their personal lives that they don't have the time to analyze and care about every comment someone makes to them. That said, it doesn't justify people being rude at the stage door; however, an actor isn't going to sit there and dwell on the fact that someone complimented them on a previous work may be offensive. If I were in their shoes, if anything, I'd appreciate any compliment!

Also, there is absolutely nothing wrong with telling actors "good job." Of course they know there are people out there who may not like their performance. A theatergoer may be attending the show not knowing what to expect, so I don't see the issue with telling someone "good job." Hopefully this was just bad wording on the original poster's part.

There shouldn't have to be a set of rules. I'm sure actors understand what it is like to be a fan of someone and aren't going to take offense to every comment that may possibly be offensive (for example, as I described, commenting a past work). Instead, people should keep in mind basic etiquette, which applies in all social situations, not just at the stagedoor.

[misschung]

Posted: 11/13/10 at 5:45pm

"And if their job ends when the curtain goes down, so does mine. Don't expect fans follow your career and buy solo CDs and concert tickets if you can't be bothered to give them a half-assed Sharpie scrawl on a playbill and a fake smile as they fawn over you with praise. "

I agree.

[dramamama611]

Posted: 11/13/10 at 6:46pm

Really? You are suppose to be a fan of their WORK. Is it always about what they can do for YOU?

What if the day you happen to be there, they have a migraine, or a toothache, or a death in the family or any other miriad of reasons they want or NEED to leave and don't have time for 'you' -- then you'll no longer BE a fan? Good riddance then.

I am a fan of a performers body of work (and sometimes their body, too.) I have no need to pester them for anything else.

[GatorNY]

Posted: 11/14/10 at 8:33am

My pet peeve is the tourist family who didn't even see the show who happen to be walking by and line up just so their tweens can meet the "famous person" in a show that they've never heard of until they walked past the theater. BTW, Jordan...thanks for the eye candy as usual.

[orangeskittles]

Posted: 11/14/10 at 11:45am

Oh, please, be sensible. I'm not talking about someone who happens to have a migraine the one time I'm at the stagedoor to meet them, I'm talking about the actors who make it a habit of sneaking out side doors to avoid fans. It's about showing respect towards the people who support their career and livelihood.

Fans matter. Actors don't get parts if producers don't think they will attract an audience, and people who adamantly refuse to interact with their fans aren't going to have one. Like it or not, it's the nature of the business.

[AEA AGMA SM]

Posted: 11/14/10 at 11:50am

I think it's far more sensible for an actor who does not like the crowds to avoid them, rather than go into a situation they don't want to be a part of.

[Bettyboy72]

Posted: 11/14/10 at 12:06pm

I agree that stage dooring has gotten out of hand due to all the picture taking and video taking. Technology has pushed the average person into being so fascinated with THEMSELVES, so they need to document every freaking thing on facebook or it didnt happen. They are no longer happen with a moment with a celebrity.

Plus, people have no common sense. If an actor looks tired, isnt made up or is wrung out have decency and don't ask them for a photo. Most people are so self serving and oblivious to anyone else's needs.

[orangeskittles]

Posted: 11/14/10 at 12:16pm

I sincerely doubt there are half as many claustrophobic, enochlophobia, germaphobic, OCD actors on Broadway as there are people who use that excuse in defense. I used to make excuses, but since then I've witnessed that there are actors who privately admit they just don't want to be bothered with it. The actors who wait in their dressing room for over an hour, then call down to the stagedoor to make sure no one is still waiting, and complain when there are still two fans aren't worthy of the endless internet excuses about social anxiety disorders, new puppies, deaths in the family, etc. etc. etc. I don't see why people have such a problem admitting to themselves that a lot of times, there is no "reason", the actors just don't want to deal with you.

[Bettyboy72]

Posted: 11/14/10 at 12:26pm

An actor could be fine with stagedooring initially but easily develop an anxiety disorder from the impending doom of dealing with nut jobs on a daily basis.

[AEA AGMA SM]

Posted: 11/14/10 at 12:27pm

They shouldn't have to give a reason. If an actor doesn't want to deal with fans then that is their choice. As is often stated in many stage dooring threads, the price of the ticket entitles you to the performance, nothing else. There is no obligation to make sure you get an autograph, or a picture to post on Facebook, or anything else.

And quite frankly, I would be leery to meeting somebody who was essentially stalking me (waiting outside a door for an hour or more is a bit obsessive).

And many actors are pretty neurotic so I would not be surprised at all about high numbers of OCD, claustrophobia, agoraphobia, etc.