How can I convice my parents to let me go see a Broadway show by myself.

[Adescalzo14]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 9:40am

So I enter in lotteries and when I win, my dad and I go and see the shows. But right now my dad doesn't have the money to see a Broadway show, but I do. I am a 14-year-old who lives on long island so Broadway is a 1 hr train ride away from where I live. I am very independent and I think that I can go see a Broadway show by myself but my parents don't think so. Does anyone know how I can convince them? Also, I know that the Marquis theatre checks ids when it comes to winning the lottery but does any other theatre check id?

[dramamama611]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 10:02am

You convince them with actions, not words. I'm about as liberal as they get, and I know too many 14 year olds... not ready alone, too big a target. With friends, maybe.

[BroadwayNoob]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 10:03am

Regarding lotteries - I wouldn't take the risk. If you show up and they do ID, you just lost like 40 dollars. Try rushing a show - I'm 15 and my friends and I went in to the city and rushed a matinee of TPTGW. Could you find a friend that might want to go in with you? I felt the same way last year when I wanted to go in to the city to go to Broadway in BP, but my parents really didn't want me to go in alone. This summer was the first time I've been in the city alone, and both times I've been with two friends of mine. Just understand that your parents are worried about your safety, and it is scary that if anything were to happen you are alone.

[Scarlet Leigh]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 10:12am

Pretty much ALL shows are going to be checking IDs upon the pick up of the lotto tickets. It's a safety against people that would enter and then attempt to sell the tickets off to someone else for a profit. At the age of 14, I agree with one of the others above. On your own, no. Your parents are thinking of your safety. You might be mature enough but that doesn't protect you from those that would prey upon a 14 year old traveling on their own. In a group or three or four however would be a better idea. Safety in numbers. Don't risk your safety.

[John Adams]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 10:15am

Adescalzo14 said: "I am very independent and I think that I can go see a Broadway show by myself but my parents don't think so. Does anyone know how I can convince them? "

I believe that you're independent, and it sounds like you have a great relationship with your dad in terms of attending theater together. That's he good news!

...and now for the bad. Your parents have placed a restriction on you that feels unwarranted, but that does not mean they don't recognize that you are an independent person. Without knowing your parents, I can only assume that they are thinking of your safety above all.

No matter how independent, mature, intelligent you are, you are still a minor, and your parents are responsible for your well-being. It seems to me that they understand that responsibility, and that they take  their responsibility seriously. How loved are you?

But it is difficult to be in your shoes. I'm sure that there are opportunities for you to exercise your independence in an environment where your parents will also feel comfortable. While it is difficult to be in your shoes, with the restrictions of this circumstance, there is room for compromise. You need to speak with your parents - not strangers on a Message Board.

If I could offer any advice, I might suggest that you begin a conversation with your parents by eliminating any "I" statements (i.e., I am capable, or I want...). Ask them about their reasons for not allowing you to go on your own. As you are growing into adulthood, you now have additional responsibilities; some of which include taking the additional time necessary to listen and understand the needs of those you love. 

Once that goal is achieved, both you and your parents can continue the conversation regarding a compromise (perhaps scheduling a later date when your dad can go with you?).

Best of luck! It sounds like you have parents who care about you and love you!

[Wick3]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 10:31am

Why don't you surprise your dad and treat him to a broadway show if you win the lottery? In that way, both of you can go see the show and your dad would be able to go with you since you paid for his ticket! It would also be a bonding experience your dad will remember for a very long time.

[Adescalzo14]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 10:35am

Scarlet Leigh said: "Pretty much ALL shows are going to be checking IDs upon the pick up of the lotto tickets. It's a safety against people that would enter and then attempt to sellthe tickets off to someone else for a profit. At the age of 14, I agree with one of the others above. On your own, no. Your parents are thinking of your safety. You might be mature enough but that doesn't protect you from those that would prey upon a 14 year old traveling on their own. In a group or three or four however would be a better idea. Safety in numbers. Don't risk your safety."

About the ID I have a school-issued ID to show who I am so would that count or does it need to be in a license? Also if my parents know I really want to see a show they might consider it hard. that's what they did for when I wanted to carousel but I am not seeing it since I really ended up not liking the soundtrack and the story didn't really interest me.

 

[moira8]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 10:58am

Adescalzo14 said: "So I enter in lotteries and when I win, my dad and I go and see the shows. But right now my dad doesn't have the money to see a Broadway show, but I do."

Since you have the money, it'd be nice for you to treat your dad to a broadway show you want to see. Problem solved.

 

[haterobics]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 11:02am

Adescalzo14 said: "carousel... I am not seeing it since I really ended up not liking the soundtrack."

I agree with your dad now. You're not mature enough yet. The songs in Carousel are lovely. The story? Not so much.

[Sarah329]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 11:15am

You’re supposed to be 18 or older to enter the lotteries so they might not let you use a school ID? I’ve never tried.

[(Insert Clever Name)]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 11:23am

I’ve been traveling to the city alone since I was 12. My dad works in the city so when I started we would both go and split up. I let them put a tracking device on me along with my iPhone because find my iPhone sucks. Three power banks with 4 charges each. I look a lot older than I am which helps. My parents are also very lenient. I took my first flight alone at age 9. I made the argument than many kids I know in the city can roam alone. I think I wore them out really.

[michaelhale]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 11:28am

I agree with the other posters here, your parents care about you and bad things happen to even the most independent and smart kids, because kids are targets, unfortunately. But there are definitely ways to protect yourself that you can discuss with your parents, if you do think they can be swayed:

You can share your location using a Google account through the Google Maps app on your phone. This way your parents can always be aware of where you are.

You can have regular check ins, every 15/30 minutes or so, to let them know where you are. You guys can set up a danger word as well for these, so if you are in trouble you can discreetly let them know, and since you will have your location on your phone, they will be able to find you. As well, with your location they won't have to be worried during the time you won't be able to check in during the show.

Make sure you have a portable charger and your phone is fully charged. There's also check in apps you can download where you need to respond to an alarm every x amount of time and if you miss the response then it will contact an emergency number (you can put in your parent's) for you.

Your parents are worried about your safety, which unfortunately can have little to do with your independence. It can be very frustrating, I know, but this is how they show they care. You can always just wait until your dad has enough money.

The advice from John Adams about approaching discussion is also very good. Being mature and civil in discussion is hard, even as a grown up haha, but being calm and rational and prepared for a "no" will go a long way to show your parents how responsible you are. Don't go into the discussion only prepared to accept a yes.

[BrodyFosse123]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 12:27pm

Gee Louise.  My parents let me see my first Broadway show ALONE when I was 7 years old.  I wanted to see again the original cast of PIPPIN; they didn't; they bought me a ticket, dropped me off at the Imperial Theatre, watched me go in, they were waiting for me at the theatre after the performance.  After this, it became a norm for me whenever I wanted to see a show again that they didn't.  This was 1972.  When NYC was at its dangerous peak.  I also started traveling internationally by myself since I was 9 years old.  My dad was a well-respected session musician who was always on the road so I grew up traveling.  My parents taught me to be independent starting as a toddler.  I'm amazed at how many millennials can't even clean a bathroom, build an IKEA table and all because their parents took care of everything for them.  

[dramamama611]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 12:56pm

The key? They dropped you off and picked you up.

[OnBroadway4]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 2:27pm

Adescalzo14 said: "So I enter in lotteries and when I win, my dad and I go and see the shows. But right now my dad doesn't have the money to see a Broadway show, but I do. I am a 14-year-old who lives on long island so Broadway is a 1 hr train ride away from where I live. I am very independent and I think that I can go see a Broadway show by myself but my parents don't think so. Does anyone know how I can convince them? Also, I know that the Marquis theatre checks ids when it comes to winning the lottery but does any other theatre check id?"

I understand your parents' POV. Most shows are in the evening and even in summer when they let out, it's already dark. I'm sure it's not comforting to know your child is roaming a big city at night all alone. I think others gave you some very good advice:

1. If you can afford it, pay for your dad's ticket and bring him along.

2. Be ready to accept a no, and that's okay too. (My parents were overly strict with letting us kids out the house. They were busy and tired, but as soon as I got a car, they gave me so much independence, because they knew they could trust me. I was extremely mature for my age.) You will have plenty of opportunities to do this when you are older. I know it sucks hearing this as a kid, but it's true.

3. Have a tracking device or constant communication while getting there.

I think if you tried a matinee your first time and showed them how responsible you are, they would be a bit more lax in future situations. Maybe you can text them and give them updates while you're getting there. Then when you're at the theatre snap a picture and send it to them and let them know that you'll be turning your phone off or on silent mode and will text them once the show is over. Let them know when you are on the train back. I think constant communication will ease their worries a bit too. 

 

[Dollypop]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 4:14pm

My 13 year old granddaughter would love to travel into the city to see shows by herself. She sees me doing it all the time and thinks it's "cool". She definitely knows her way around the city and is fully capable of negotiating the traons and subways, so there's no.problrm there.

The problem is that she's very pretty. A pretty 13 year old teenager sitting alone on a subway or eating alone at Juniors might attract the wrong kind of attention.

For now, I'll gladly join her.

[upinlights]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 4:56pm

Hey! As someone who grew up in the NYC suburbs and moved for school just last week, I have a ton of experience in theater by myself/managing my parents/etc... I would say 14 is a bit young, especially coming from LI and having to walk or taxi from Penn to the theater district yourself. I started going to the city by myself right before I turned 15, but I was also a bit closer to the city than you are. My mom wasn't big on me taking the train and walking in the dark, so the first time I saw a show myself (15.5 y/o), she (very nicely) took me on the train and picked me up. That being said, if you have the money for it, treat your father and have him take you! I worked two jobs around my neighborhood from ages 15-18 and got money for shows that way. If you're thrifty, you can make it work, but I think you should wait a year before venturing to the city yourself :) side note: I also taped on a piece of paper to my student ID with a fake birthday to seem older and get lotto tix, but no one ever checked me... 

Updated On: 8/22/18 at 04:56 PM

[dearalanaaaa]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 4:56pm

I've been doing Broadway alone since I was 12. They'd drive me in and drop me a few blocks down and let me walk if traffic was too bad. They don't like Broadway, so they never came with me. Here's how it was possible:
-Life 360 is an amazing app she used to keep tabs on me, and it was in it's early stages at the time. I can track her too if I need anything as well!
- bring a portable charger and cord, as well as basic directions to navigate the place.
- Avoid obvious places like alleys and dark bodegas.
- Appear like you're on a mission and have a place to be
- Try to look 19+ (especially as a female). Wear heels or makeup. Carry a clutch.

[yesraccoons]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 5:15pm

It says you have to be 18 to enter lotteries but the only one that I think would really care is Hamilton. I’m sixteen and I enter lotteries myself all the time. Just put a different year for the birthday. They check your ID for name they don’t really care about age. I highly doubt any box office will give you **** for it.

As for convincing your parents, personally I began rushing shows on my own (as in hours alone in time square) when I was 15. You also may be able to compromise with your parents. Like you only see maintees alone. I understand how if you’re coming home late it may be an issue. Maybe you can get some friend to come with you too and it’d be different. Good luck!

[everythingtaboo]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 7:16pm

I'd say skip the lotteries and book a ticket in advance, so you have a definite date/time to present to them, and then treat them to a LIRR ticket to come in with you, have lunch before a matinee, they can drop you off, and pick you up. If they don't come in the city often, I'm sure someone can kill 2.5 hours before meeting you back at the theatre.

Remind them there are thousands of kids that navigate the city streets all by themselves every single day going to schools, some just blocks away from Times Square. And with national security concern, there's no place more safe than Times Square on any given day.

[highlander0704]

Posted: 8/22/18 at 11:52pm

I think that's awesome that your parents support your love of the arts.  Like someone else suggested, try to treat your dad to the show.  Just make sure it works for his schedule before entering for two tickets and let him know ahead of time that it's your treat.  It seems like the easiest solution for now and maybe going to even more shows with you will show him that this is a real passion of yours and you're comfortable walking around in the city and going from Penn to the Theater District.  Maybe they'll let you go by the time you're 15 and if it's a matinee.

Additionally, you're not old enough to enter any lottos yet - I'm not sure if you had been entering your dad in the past?  You have to be 18 years old for Lucky Seat, Broadway Direct, and Broadway Boosters goes.  If you're comfortable spending time/money to go into the city only to possibly be turned down then go for it.  But I know of at least two different high schoolers whose IDs were checked (possibly by the same box office attendant based on their description) who were not allowed to pick up their winning ticket.  Maybe you can pass for 18 more easily though? 

Since the school year is starting up, maybe ask one of the arts teachers if there are any Broadway field trips planned.  If you're not in chorus/orchestra/etc., maybe they'll still let you attend if your parent signs a permission slip and if it doesn't interfere with class. I had two different teachers in high school who organized Broadway field trips and it was always really nice, provided you're with a group that actually wants to be there. 

Do you have any friends that do CAP (Cultural Arts Playhouse)?  If so, maybe they can include you when they go see shows and your parents will feel more comfortable if you're with a group going into the city.

[yankeefan7]

Posted: 8/23/18 at 2:59am

You maybe a very mature 14 yr old and only your parents know that but you are still a very young person and being in NYC by yourself at day/night is not something I would allow a 14 yr old to do. You have plenty of years left in your life to experience Broadway alone so for the time being I would grin and bear it (lol) and understand your parents are really looking after your best interests. For now, just enjoy shows that you can attend with your parents or another adult family member.

Updated On: 8/23/18 at 02:59 AM

[Adescalzo14]

Posted: 8/23/18 at 7:29am

What is the CAP?

[dramamama611]

Posted: 8/23/18 at 11:48am

The poster wrote what CAP is right next to it!

[highlander0704]

Posted: 8/25/18 at 11:14am

Cultural Arts Playhouse in Syosset. They used to have a Wantagh location too, but they've moved around a bit I think. CAP