When Someone Overflows Onto Your Seat & Ruins The Show?

I'm a pretty easy-going guy & can put up with a lot in the theater, from cell phones to folks eating Chinese food during the show. And, it takes a lot to make me angry, but tonight, I am so angry I could spit nails.

I saw Three Tall Women tonight. Or, at least, I tried to see Three Tall Women tonight. 

I paid a lot of money for an Orchestra seat. I was dead center. Great seat. Except the otherwise lovely person next to me was very large and took easily 1/3 of my tiny seat. I was pushed so far to my right that the poor man next to me was as trapped as I was. I'm 6'1", but I fit in my own seat. When I pay $100+ for a ticket (or $10, for that matter), I expect 100% of my seat.

I spent the entire show unable to move my entire left side. I had to hold my left arm across my body (and I have a painful strained bicep). I couldn't lift my Playbill to read before the show. I could hardly applaud afterward and standing was out of the question.

Edward Albee is my favorite playwright and tonight couldn't come soon enough. But, I spent more time pulled out of the play, than enjoying it (and I tried--hard). Between the pain and the odor of the individual, which came home with me (I took a shower when I got in and I still smell it), I was only partly invested in the show & looked forward to it being over.

I recognize the sensitivity involved and I could care less how small or large anyone is and I know the individual next to me was terribly uncomfortable, as well.

Sorry for the rant, but, I'm so upset, I don't know what to do. This only happened once before, but an usher let me move to any empty seat I wanted. Tonight was sold out so that wasn't an option.

Has anyone had this happen to them? What did you do? How should I have handled the situation? I would never want to hurt someone's feelings, but I'm not sure why I should have an experience ruined because of another audience member.

haterobics said: "I'd've bolted just before curtain and asked the house manager if there was anywhere else I could go?

Good point. I didn't even consider that because it was sold out. But, they may have had another option.

My fault for not getting an aisle seat, I guess.

 

This happened to me in Hello Dolly. The woman next to me was pressed against me so hard the whole time, and she was tapping her foot through the entire first act which in turn made my entire leg move up and down since I was wedged in. I (politely) said something to her at intermission and she stopped moving so much which made it way better, but it was still pretty unbearable. The people around me were gasping with delight at the show, and I was sitting there practically fuming because I was so uncomfortable and distracted.

I want to be sensitive as well, because I imagine that she was more uncomfortable than I was, but I am also with you that it sucks to pay so much for a ticket and expect a transformative night at the theatre, only to have to deal with an impossible to ignore distraction that inevitably ruins the experience. Not sure what the solution is (especially in a full house for something like Three Tall Women or Dolly where changing seats isn't really an option) but I'm sure that most of us at least commiserate. It's just lousy luck. 

Updated On: 4/26/18 at 11:28 PM

ghostlight2 said: "Sounds like an unfortunate situation, but you lost me at this:



Really? Not only did you had to take a shower because the person next to you smelled bad, but after the shower, you still smelled them?

C'mon."

 

I smell it as I'm writing this. It's probably just one of those things that gets in your nose and stays. The person smelled. It's an observation, not a criticism.

 

GeorgeandDot said: "I often feel like overweight people are one of the last few groups that it's still socially acceptable to openly hold a prejudice against."

I don't think anyone here has a problem with the actual people! It's being mad at the situation, not the person for being overweight. No doubt that they are uncomfortable and probably embarrassed, and I feel empathy for that. But it also sucks to not be able to fully enjoy a show because of the physical experience.

I think it's like a baby crying on a plane. It's a baby who doesn't know any better, so there's certainly no blame. And there's only so much that parents can do, and I definitely feel compassion for any parents who are dealing with that crying baby. But it doesn't make it any less annoying. 

GeorgeandDot said: "No, because there's nothing to be done about it, so you can either except it or be a huge a-hole and make a scene. There's nothing to be mad about. The person can't lose 20 pounds by curtain. There's nothing to be done. Unless the person smells, I don't really care how close we are. Maybe because I grew up in New York and I'm used to being jammed next to strangers. Either way a little compassion is always good and I often feel like overweight people are one of the last few groups that it's still socially acceptable to openly hold a prejudice against."

First off, the person had an odor, which I stated, but was not mean about. This is not a 20 pound issue. This was a 400 pound person, maybe more, who was with an equally large person. Stop with the "compassion" whine. I didn't insult anyone's weight and I don't really care what anyone looks like. But, when I have to physically hold my left arm across my body with my right arm for an hour and 45 minutes, because there is nowhere to put it down next to me, that's a problem, not to mention I have a painful left bicep strain and this didn't help.

I grew up here, too and I have never had an experience like this. It used to be that people would be self-aware and, as haterobics said, shown fellow audience members some thoughtfulness and purchased an aisle seat. But, the narcissism that has taken over, shielded under the PC guise of not mentioning something unpleasant is more than distasteful.

EthelMae said: "You got me on that one. (does anyone still wear a watch?) "

I do. And I switch between the 7 I have every few days. But I'm not constantly pulling my sleeve every 5 minutes. Even if i get bored.

"I grew up here, too and I have never had an experience like this. It used to be that people would be self-aware and, as haterobics said, shown fellow audience members some thoughtfulness and purchased an aisle seat. But, the narcissism that has taken over, shielded under the PC guise of not mentioning something unpleasant is more than distasteful.

I recognize the sensitivity involved and I could care less how small or large anyone is and I know the individual next to me was terribly uncomfortable, as well."

You mean you've never had an experience other than the time you mentioned in your original post? And oh yes, how narcissistic those fat people are these days, smelly and overflowing into your seat, so thoughtless that they didn't buy an aisle seat.

"Sorry for the rant, but, I'm so upset, I don't know what to do. This only happened once before, but an usher let me move to any empty seat I wanted." 

 

haterobics said: "wolfwriter said: "I smell it as I'm writing this. It's probably just one of those things that gets in your nose and stays."

Once the sexual musk of someone's pheromones triggers you, there is no way to stop them, except to comply."

 

Thank you haterobics ...... for the funniest thing I have heard in quite awhile.  This was one of your best comments of all time.  I laughed so hard I almost piddled myself.

 

"I recognize the sensitivity involved and I could care less how small or large anyone is"

I believe you meant you couldn't care less (an odd mistake for someone whose screen name includes the word "writer" ), but your recognition of sensitivity is not well supported by your saying this:

"Stop with the "compassion" whine."

What is it, exactly, that you think you are doing with this post? 

 

Updated On: 4/26/18 at 12:56 AM