Broadway Legend Joined: 9/20/08
Saw the National Tour of Spamalot today and heard a couple good ones:
Teenage/early 20's guy to his girlfriend:
"I saw Young Frankenstein the Musical as was like 'oh my god, this is incredible!' and then I watched the movie and it was like 'oh my god, this is terrible! It's all...black and white and stuff..."
Middle-aged woman during intermission, after going down and looking into the pit:
"There are actually instruments in there!"
Over the summer, my friend and I did SRO for Book of Mormon and this family with a 10-11 year old boy walks out of the theatre and goes straight to stage door. After thanking one of the Mormon boys for a great performance, he sees the kid and the kid says "You were so good in the show!" and he chuckled and said "Wait! You saw the show?" The kid said yes and his parents were behind him. This man gave his parents the dirtiest look I have ever seen! We could not stop laughing!
Maybe I'm just tired but I've read this about ten times and am still confused. An actor in the show gave the parents a dirty look?
BoM intermission. A boy of roughly tween years turned to his father right as the lights were coming up and said, loud enough for those of us around him to hear, "I don't get it, what's a clitoris?" Sheepishly, dad said "I'm still trying to figure that one out." Felt really bad for his wife until the second act started.
^ THAT was good.
It's not you, Eris, I'm baffled, too. WHO did the thanking (and of whom??) and who is the "he" who saw the kid?
And who is "this man"? The actor? Another person at stage door?
(This is clearly a case of pronoun abuse.)
I knew this was gonna happen... not a big fan of tiny laptop...
OK! So what happened was one of the actors who playedone of the Mormon boys saw this little 10-11 year old kid at the stage door. When the kid said "You were amazing! I loved the show", the actor looked confused and said "Wait! You saw the show?" The kid said yes and his parents were right behind them. (HERE'S WHAT HAPPENED) The actor looked the parents and the actor gave the parents the "My name is Patti LuPone" dirty look and I thought it was pretty funny. Sorry for all the confusion...
Broadway Legend Joined: 10/16/11
BUMP
I literally got an account to post this:
So i saw CAMELOT at the John W. Engeman theatre a few weeks ago and this woman behind me (i was front row) said:
"Wow, I love sitting so close to the stage. You can see so many things that you can't see when sitting in the back. For example, one of the actors stuffed his package."
I died of laughter XD
At Bonnie and Clyde this past Thursday. A man says to his companion "I better be humming some of the songs from this show when I leave or I will be angry".
Chorus Member Joined: 7/17/11
I saw the tour of Shrek about 2 weeks ago. And I live in FL. So there is A LOT of oldies.. Well a common thing is for the oldies to just talk loud because of their hearing aids and ****. And I was in the balcony at row N and he was in row G. When farquad made is entrance, this old man turned to his wife and (he thought he was whispering) LOUDLY said " Oh I get it. HE'S A MIDGET! THAT'S PRETTY GOD DAMN FUNNY"
me and my sister had to bury our heads in our programs to keep the laughter down
Leading Actor Joined: 5/20/11
My sister sat behind two tween girls at Rent and overheard these:
Girl 1: *looking at song list in Playbill* Where is "Would You Light My Candle"? I don't see it.
Girl 2: Are you sure it's in this musical?
Girl 1: I think so. I'm pretty sure. But I just can't find it.
Girl 1: Mom, why are those two girls kissing?
Girl 2: Mom, what's AZT?
Mom: It's a medicine for AIDS.
Girl 2: Oh...What's AIDS?
Girl 1:*at intermission* Is this halftime? It's halftime, right? Are they going to do "Seasons of Love" after halftime?
Broadway Legend Joined: 10/16/11
A few years ago I saw Million Dollar Quartet when it was on Broadway, and some woman a few rows in front of me loudly asked where the hot dogs and popcorn were being sold...
During intermIssion of Anything Goes this old guy says:
"I like most musicals...except for Wicked. That show is too damn long "
Way back in the dark ages, I used to usher at American Conservatory Theatre. They were doing a big honking production of THREE SISTERS. Now, anyone who knows the play knows the curtain line for almost every single act is "To Moscow! We must go to Moscow! Things will be better in Moscow!"
When the curtain came down on the third act, this matronly lady sitting in front of my station says to her companion, "That's just like my sister Sophie. She always wants to go to Chicago."
During the end of Spiderman when Spiderman defeats the villain:
Little Boy: Mom did Spiderman win?
Mom: Yes, honey.
Little Boy: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!
Broadway Star Joined: 8/19/10
Broadway Legend Joined: 10/16/11
Scene: The Fantasticks -- Day after thanksgiving
Little girl at intermission: THIS IS JUST LIKE MARY POPPINS!!!
When i saw Arcadia there was a old man in front of me who turned to his companion and shouted "terrible" we were in the mezz but he was so loud I'd be surprised if the actors didn't hear him.
Understudy Joined: 6/15/06
Last night at Follies, the lady in front of me and her daughter stood up, and the woman said "I thought you said it was Elaine Stritch!! Who's that lady?"
....
Friday at Follies, the teenagers behind me had no idea what the show was about, who wrote, who the cast was (aside from bernadette.) They called the blurb from his book in the program "Sondheim's review of the show." -_-
i got a text this morning from my best friend, "i am going to go see BOM today, we are on our way to the discount tix place"
i just texted her back and said, "wow, good luck with that i hope you can't hear me laughing all the way over in California"
i get another text a little later, "wait, there is no tix at the TKTS booth for BOM is it not playing today"
my final answer before she stopped texting me "seriously can you hear me laughing? because i am dying over here"
^My friends thought they could just walk up to the box office and get premium seats for the matinee on the day of. I told them they would fail...but they didn't listen. Guess who ended up not seeing the show that day lol
Broadway Legend Joined: 7/28/05
Man after War Horse:
I'm confused... was that a play or a musical?
I'm amazed by how many people still think that they can get BOM tickets on a whim. I saw 3 groups try to get tickets at TKTS. One woman was complaining about the lottery system and everything (she was right next to me) So when I won the lotto, let's just say I had the smuggest look on my face :}
I meant to post this before:
A few weeks ago, as I was walking out of How to Succeed, a girl who was maybe 12 or 13 said to her mother,
"Mom, that was nothing like Harry Potter."
I almost died of laughter.
The worst is when there are 3 or 4 consecutive winners at BoM who list New York as their state. I've heard a few out-of-town tourists complain about that. The lotto guy actually sassed one of them and said, "Well, look where we ARE!"
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