Hilarious Comments Overheard By Tourists and Audience Members- Page 58

[AudreyTwoTwo]

Posted: 4/2/07 at 12:28pm

My friend is kind of ditzy. She doesn't know much about things. When I brought the Little Shop of Horrors Playbill to school a few years ago, I showed her the playbill and she looked at the pictures of Hunter and his understudy. She said, "so, did you see the guy with the black hair or the ugly one?" I said, "Uhm, they both have black hair! IT'S BLACK AND WHITE!"
She said, "Oh. So who did you see?" "Hunter." "Oh. So you saw the ugly one."
INSULT!

[AudreyTwoTwo]

Posted: 4/2/07 at 12:36pm

This one isnt really funny, or about tourists...

When I was 9, I saw Seussical with my family. We went to see it and I had a Cat in the Hat Hat on. Rosie O' Donnell was in it at the time. I saw this man walking down the isle and I recognized him from the back of his head. When he turned, I realized it was Tom Hanks!
I immediately screamed "OMG IT'S WOODY!" Then, people applauded and a mob formed and started running towards the seat.

It was really kind of odd since he looked at me and smiled. I thought he was upset actually lol

[LyTeMyCanDyI]

Posted: 4/6/07 at 9:26pm

Last night in a parking garage on 50th and Broadway.

Mother and 4 teen girls: ::sees my Playbill:: What show did you see? The Fantasticks?
Me: Spring Awakening.
Mother: Oh. Spring Weekend! How was it.
My friend: Good, ::looking at the younger girls:: but not Kosher. Definately not Kosher for Passover.
Girls: Don't see the Fantasticks! It was awful.
Another girl: Yea. I don't think it'll last long.

[rocker05]

Posted: 4/6/07 at 10:19pm

Mentioned this on another thread, but had to mention it again.

At The Pirate Queen Wednesday Night:

Usher: Miss, remember, you need your stub to come back in.

Woman: Don't worry I'm not coming back! (Screams) IT STINKS!

I laughed so hard, it was more entertaining than the show!

[ahmelie]

Posted: 4/6/07 at 10:37pm

This had me laughing so hard

My Dad: Why are you so tired?
Me: I've been trying to dance like Donna McKechnie.
My Dad: John McCain did what?

I don't know how he heard John McCain, but now I have images of John McCain doing Turkey Lurkey in my head...

Oh, and my mom sat down to watch the concert version of Sweeney Todd with me (with Patti LuPone) and so The Begger Woman comes on during There's No Place Like London and my mom turns to me and goes
"Does he kill hookers? Is that where this is going?"

Updated On: 4/6/07 at 10:37 PM

[wonderfulwizard11]

Posted: 4/6/07 at 10:41pm

One night my parents and I were talking about shows we've seen, and we started talking about Dr. Dolittle. My mom and I agreed we both hated it, but my dad disagreed, saying:

I must like theatre then, because I enjoyed it.

[Becoz_i_knew_you21]

Posted: 4/6/07 at 10:42pm

"I don't know how he heard John McCain, but now I have images of John McCain doing Turkey Lurkey in my head..."

My mom just asked why I was laughing so hard

[istillbelieve24601]

Posted: 4/6/07 at 10:47pm

My mother was in a production of Crazy for You at a community theatre. Playing the part of Moose was a very talented performer who, besides being a very good actor, was also a professional bass player. He both played the bass and sang during "Slap that Bass." In his bio, he mentioned several times how he was returning to the stage after being exclusively in the pit for fifteen years and how glad he was to be slapping his bass onstage again. During intermission, I heard the elderly couple next to us whispering: "Wow, the show's very good so far. I wonder how they rigged up the guy on the bass. He couldn't have been playing it for real. It looked convincing, but if they had a real guy playing it, he wouldn't be in community theatre." I was fuming. If only those morons had read the program!

My grandparents have an interesting relationship with theatre. For example, they saw Les Mis back in 1987 and have the cast album. They can remember where they went to eat the night of the show, what they ordered and where exactly their seats in the theatre were, but they can't remember anything about the show. When I went to see the revival last month, my grandma was curious about the actors.

Me: Wow! You guys are so lucky that you get to see the original and the revival. It's great.

Grandma: That's good. How was the guy?

Me: Which guy?

Grandma: The guy who sang.

Updated On: 4/6/07 at 10:47 PM

[caitiesus1522]

Posted: 4/6/07 at 11:27pm

How do they have the Les Mis soundtrack?

[istillbelieve24601]

Posted: 4/6/07 at 11:33pm

*facepalm*

I need to go to bed.

I AM SO STUPID!!!!!!

[RockabyeHamlet]

Posted: 4/6/07 at 11:38pm

(sitting in Sweeney Todd)

"Woman- Its such a shame they made that poor man have to shave his head for this show.

Me- He's always like that.

Woman- Dose he have cancer?! Oh dear, maybe I should send a card."

Me- *stares for a good 5 minutes*

Updated On: 4/6/07 at 11:38 PM

[jv92]

Posted: 4/6/07 at 11:44pm

The Pirate Queen walkout story, Donna McKechnie and John McCain story and the Michael Cerveris story are hysterical. I wish I had something good to post now, but I don't.

[stageishome]

Posted: 4/7/07 at 12:01am

So, my friend is not the smartest....

J: So, I'm, like, going to New York City over Spring Break!

Me: Yeah? Are you going to see any shows?

J: Um...oh, yeah! RENT is in town!

Me: RENT is on B'way. What do you mean it's 'in town?'

J: Well, you know, shows tour around the country and they stop in New York every once and while- well RENT is stopping there when I'm there! And I mean, it's not the original cast or anything, it's a few down, but it's probably better than what I could do!

Me: Alright...


----several days later after her trip----

J: I saw CURTAINS, too!

Me: Yeah? How did you like it?

J: David Hyde Pierce was hilarious!

Me: Did you like the story?

J: Oh....yeah, uh, it was funny, something about a murder. They had indians!

Me: *shakes head*

[neddyfrank2]

Posted: 4/7/07 at 12:34am

My friend went to see Hairspray when she was little and she got to go backstage.

It opened three years ago, so she was little three years ago but not anymore?

[virgil blessing2]

Posted: 4/7/07 at 2:50am

TRUE SOTRY - At CHITTY CHITTY BANG BANG awhile back. Sat. nite show, chaos. children everywhere. intermisison. a little spanish boy runs past me, SCREAMING like an idiot. his mother begins chasing after him, calling his name:

MOTHER: "Nacho! NACHO!"

WASP WOMAN sititng next to me hears the mother. w/out missing a beat, sarcastic deadpan: "Nacho? Hmmm. Must be Spanish for Chip."

WASP WOMAN #2 next to her, not hearing, repulsed by the notion: "They sell nachos here??!"

[Jellylorum]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 5:25pm

This isn't about a specific incidence, but there are quite a few people think A Chorus Line is a clean, fun, glitzy show and are shocked to find out that it isn't. It's an understandable mistake, since the only thing most people know about it is "One."

But one reviewer on Broadwaybox.com said, "We were very disappointed with this new version of Chorus Line...language/profanity was disgusting...do not recommend for children or adolescents..."
He seems to be implying that he's seen the original, but I don't know what this person is talking about. I've never seen the original version, but the content hasn't changed, right?

Updated On: 4/20/07 at 05:25 PM

[jarretSF]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 7:18pm

When I was helping with merchandise on ALtar Boyz during the recent SF stop - we frequently had people showing up looking for Jersey Boys. If you know the theatres at all - they are NOT close in proximity. When they bought tickets - do you think they would know what theatre it is in????

One lady was calmly trying to explain to her friend (who realized they were in the wrong location) that Jersey Boys was sold out - so they weren't promoting it - but it was playing in the other auditorium, and the ushers would show them where to go inside. At the doors they were given directions from the Orpheum to the Curran - 5 minutes before curtain.

A school group was standing out in front and a teenage girl proclaimed (after looking at the poster promoting Kathleen Turner and Bill Irwin in Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?) " I need to see that show - I did a monologue from it last semester! I really want to see Who's Afraid of The Virgin Wolf!"
And she repeated herself - over and over and over.

[dashb10ard]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 7:22pm

Last weekend I was in the M&Ms store in Times Square with my friends and we asked this girl to take a picture of us with one of the big M&Ms (don't judge) because we didn't know she was waiting, and she did, and then when we were finished, this family (who appeared to be British) went to go in front of her as well, and her mother was like "Excuse me, she's been waiting for a while!" And the father of the British family, deliberately being a jerk, was like "Okay, do you mind if we go after you, is that okay?" When the girl's mother said it was, he backed away and turned to his kids and said "Welcome to America, kids."

It STILL makes me laugh just thinking about it.

[shesamarshmallow]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 8:31pm

" I need to see that show - I did a monologue from it last semester! I really want to see Who's Afraid of The Virgin Wolf!"

I heard that story in person! Yay me.

Last night at Jersey Boys (SF) the old lady next to me sang (AND DANCED) along to all the songs. I would have been mad, but it was my 7th time, and honestly I appreciated the enthusiasm. Then she turned to me at intermission and said "They never swore like that in my day! Or had marijuana!"

[LyTeMyCanDyI]

Posted: 4/26/07 at 4:50pm

My friend was going through my iPod. She got to the songs from Cabaret and said, "Oh you don't have my favorite!" I asked which one it was. She said "Big Spender, you know, from Chicago." I told her no, it's from Sweet Charity. She said, "Umm...I think I know where my favorite song is from." I replied with, "Umm, I think I would have remembered seeing it in the three times I saw Chicago." She shut up.

And why would it have been in my Cabaret playlist if it was from Chicago?

[Mattbrain]

Posted: 4/26/07 at 4:54pm

"Last weekend I was in the M&Ms store in Times Square with my friends and we asked this girl to take a picture of us with one of the big M&Ms (don't judge) because we didn't know she was waiting, and she did, and then when we were finished, this family (who appeared to be British) went to go in front of her as well, and her mother was like "Excuse me, she's been waiting for a while!" And the father of the British family, deliberately being a jerk, was like "Okay, do you mind if we go after you, is that okay?" When the girl's mother said it was, he backed away and turned to his kids and said "Welcome to America, kids.""

Wow, what an asshole.

[Anti-Romanticist]

Posted: 4/26/07 at 7:17pm

My mom and I had this convo while at Les Mis with Lea Salonga as Fantine. BEFORE I post the convo, I HAVE TO say one disclaimer though: I really do love my mother dearly and she really is a nice person and all...she just doesn't pick out actors very well sometimes...

*At Intermission*
Me: So what do you think of the show so far, mom?
Mom: It's good so far.
Me: That's great to hear. (insert fangirlish gushing over how awesome Norm Lewis is as Javert) So who do you like so far?
Mom: I like the girl who played Fantine. She can hold those notes forever. There's one thing that really stood out for me though.
Me: What?
Mom: It's interesting how they used the same girl for Fantine and the older Cosette.
Me: :|
Mom: ...
Me: ...Mom.
Mom: What?
Me: Cosette and Fantine are two different actresses.
Mom: Really?
Me: ...Yeah.
*the end*

[caitlinette]

Posted: 4/26/07 at 8:21pm

*facepalm*

I need to go to bed.

I AM SO STUPID!!!!!!

I missed something -- what did you say that was so stupid?

[Marianne]

Posted: 4/26/07 at 11:07pm

From the last time the Les Miz tour came through my city: two teenage girls at the stage door, giggling at each other, peering at all the guys who came out and whispering things like, "No, that's not him, I don't think he's come out yet."

"Are you here for Randal Keith?" says I. [Randal was playing Valjean at the time.] "Or waiting for someone you know?"

"Oh no," they say, exchanging conspirational giggles. "We don't know anyone. We're just here for him. You know. Captain Vest."

[neddyfrank2]

Posted: 4/26/07 at 11:20pm

Marianne- Who is Captain Vest?

caitlinette- That he called a cast recording a soundtrack.